The blonde moaned seductively as she got closer. She took a deep breath and held it as she reached her peak. Her brow furrowed with delicious tension and then relaxed as she slowly exhaled her satisfaction. The redhead’s freckled face was pink from her ragged breathing. Her sharp gasp when the moment arrived turned into a giggle as she grinned sweetly.
The two brunettes were antonyms. The first was verbal with every sexual obscenity until she almost screamed when she climaxed. The other was silent, her lips pursed, her eyes intense until they briefly rolled back in her head before she sighed and took on a peaceful glow.
There were four similarly diverse clips of men reaching orgasm. To open the safe, they would need to correctly identify who was whose partner. Brad was sure he could tell, so Janet allowed him to try his luck—unsuccessfully—before systematically trying the twenty-four possible pairings of men and women.
Having failed to unlock it, she was reviewing her work when her husband suggested, “What if two of them are gay?”
“Good point,” she agreed. “That makes more possibilities. If there is a gay couple, there must also be lesbians.”
She let him suggest which candidates to try first. Although he did get the male pair right, she still had to cycle through the other possible combinations until, with a musical fanfare, the safe door popped open.
Inside was a recipe for Banana Cream Pie.
Obtaining the recipe from the safe was the first objective in the x-rated escape room they were doing for their annual New Year’s Eve tradition. For fourteen years, they had been celebrating their love by climaxing together at the stroke of midnight. Although it had started as a simple happenstance, it had grown to become an occasion and even an adventure.
Earlier this year, when they had done a normal mystery escape room, they had discovered this sex-themed version designed for couples at that location. Offering to pay substantially more than the usual rate—in cash—convinced the owner to have an employee open it for them on New Year’s Eve.
It had the admittedly silly and contrived premise that they were to retrieve a secret recipe from a safe and escape without being caught. To avoid detection by the alarm sensors, they both needed to stay sexually excited until they finished.
They wore electronics that monitored their heart rate, blood pressure, temperature, and skin conductivity. The colors ran from red—failure—through orange and yellow to green—turned on. Blue and purple show sexual exertion and it would gleam white at orgasm.
Maintaining their arousal was made more difficult by their chastity suits. At the start, they stripped naked, which gave them the opportunity to stimulate themselves into the blue range. But then each had to don a plastic pear-shaped bubble. There was a large hole at the bottom to allow them to get inside and three smaller holes at the top enabled their heads and arms to protrude. They looked like Tweedledee and Tweedledum.
The bulky suits precluded any stimulation, self or mutual. Even attempts to kiss were impeded by their sumo wrestler shapes.
To ensure that they didn’t remove the suits or otherwise cheat, there were surveillance cameras. Their privacy was guaranteed because the cameras did not record or display what they observed to anyone. Instead, computers analyzed the images internally and only raised the alarm if something improper was detected.
Excited both by their anticipation and their preliminary love-making, they entered the room full of puzzles to solve. The riddles had sexual topics, which helped keep them in the green. Easier preliminary questions led to more difficult ones.
In addition to obtaining the recipe, opening the safe allowed them to watch the full clips of the four couplings they had identified. Janet had to pull Brad away, saying, “We don’t have time for that.”
Searching for clues or puzzles, Brad found a sheet of paper.
“At the orgy, four men—Gil, Hal, Ira, and Joe—want to have sex with four women—Kat, Lin, Meg, and Nia. The men have different cock sizes (below average, average, above average, and huge) and the women want to do it in different positions (missionary, cowgirl, doggy, and sixty-nine).” Brad sounded confused as he read the paper. “Who has the average cock, who does he fuck, and how? Is this a joke? How the fuck should I know?” he laughed.
“No, it’s a puzzle,” grinned Janet, picking up a pencil and drawing a grid on the pad of paper. “Read me the clues.”
“Gil has sex doggy style,” he slowly read the list as Janet made marks on the grid. “Both Ira and Lin’s partner do not have above-average cocks. Nia does it missionary but not with Joe. The two men who do missionary and cowgirl have neither the smallest nor the largest cocks.”
He shook his head as he watched her work, hoping she could make sense of the clues.
“Finally,” he editorialized, “Poor Ira has the smallest cock, and is not Kat’s partner, so bad for him but better for her I guess.”
He set the sheet down next to her so she could confirm what he read and review them as she added Xs and Os to her grid. Without her, he would have been reduced to random guesses of the hundreds of possible combinations. As he watched her work, the device on his wrist chirped; the indicator had turned orange; hers was still yellow.
“Uh-oh,” he warned, “I’m in trouble. Better hurry.”
“Don’t rush me or I’ll make a mistake and we’ll get a penalty. Why don’t you picture these couples going at it, or whatever you want? Since when is it hard to get you hard?” she smirked. “I’m almost done, but want to check to be sure it’s correct.”
Solving the orgy puzzle would finally allow Janet to get out of her chastity suit.
“Okay, here goes,” she said as she used the pad to enter their answer. “Joe has an average cock and fucks Lin cowgirl.”
When the musical sting indicated it was the correct answer, Brad cheered even more than his wife did. She was relieved to be out of the contraption, but as she ran her hands over her naked skin, her husband’s still sequestered genitals responded to the sight.
Spending a few moments to play with her breasts and pussy moved her indicator back into the green. She offered her fingers to him to sniff and taste, which also got him into the safe zone.
“Okay, let’s get back to work. The clock is ticking,” Janet said, retrieving her fingers. Looking for the next puzzle, she found some strange words.
“Suck my feet? Suck my itchy feet? Suck my ass, my cooch? What in the world is this?” she grumbled.
“Oh, I know what that is. It's a message we have to decipher,” laughed Brad. Where his wife excelled at math and logic, he was better with words. What it actually said was:
SUCK M'Y FEET, M'Y ICHX FEET. ANO SUCK M'Y AZT M'Y ACOOCH. -- YZC SCQO
“We have to figure out which letter substitutes for which. With that apostrophe between two letters, it shouldn’t be too hard. I’ll bet the M is for I and the Y is for M and those words are ‘I’m’. Let me see what else makes sense.” He set to work and shortly had the answer:
When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better. -- Mae West
More word puzzles followed. As he worked harder, his cock inside his plastic prison unfortunately was getting softer, requiring Janet to tease him to keep his excitement level up, which slowed his progress. What turned out to be the last puzzle for him to get out of chastity was a word ladder, where he had to get from PENIS to PUSSY changing one letter at a time.
“I wish I could help,” his wife bemoaned, “but my brain doesn’t work that way.”
He was well into the orange as he worked from both ends toward the middle.
“I’ll suck your cock as soon as you take off that plastic,” she promised, licking her lips sensuously. Although it moved him into yellow, he had to shake his head to get back to the words.
Finally, he had a solution, explaining it to her so she could check that he hadn’t made an error.
“PENIS, PENDS, MENDS, MINDS, MINTS, MISTS, MISTY, MUSTY, MUSHY, PUSHY, PUSSY!” he exclaimed, as he pressed the submit button. The tone indicated he was right and could remove his chastity suit.
Janet helped him out of the bulky encumbrance and gave him a hug. True to her word, she sank to her knees and helped resuscitate his organ. It wasn’t long before her slurping and sucking had him going from green to blue. When she withdrew from him he noticed a flicker out of the corner of his eye.
“Wait, dear,” he interrupted. “Would you take me in your mouth again?”
“Alright, but not for too long,” she chuckled, not suspecting his true motive. “We don’t know how much more we need to do in the remaining time.”
“How about that!” he exclaimed as she swallowed him again. “Turn this way a little,” he said, moving around her while gently keeping her mouth on his cock. “See that?” He pointed to a small screen near the exit door that had been blank earlier. Now it had the number 223.
Stepping back, as soon as he was no longer between her lips, the digits disappeared. He helped her to her feet and sat on the floor in front of her, grabbing her hips and mashing his mouth against her crotch.
“Now it says 212,” she reported; it wasn’t easy to see from his position. “I guess the cameras can tell when we’re having sex!”
After the constraints of the past forty-five minutes, and the samples she had provided to keep him turned on, he was not in a hurry to stop feasting on her pussy. Moaning appreciatively, she indulged him for a minute before tapping his head.
“I wonder what other numbers we can get,” she mused.
Sitting on the floor, Brad noticed that the rug in front of the exit door was quite thick. He scrambled to lie on it and pulled Janet onto him. The number changed to 113 when she straddled him and sank onto his pole. After being excited and frustrated for so long, both sighed loudly as she slowly rode him, forgetting about their situation and goal for a bit. He pulled her down into a hug and she straightened her legs between his, changing the display to 14.
“Midnight isn’t far away,” he whispered. “We can just forget this escape room.”
“Well, we still have a few minutes to experiment,” she cooed. “I would like to figure it out.” She giggled, “Don’t worry, we’re in the blue, so we’ll have no trouble cumming together when the time comes.”
She rolled next to him and pulled his shoulder, urging him to roll on top of her.
“Let’s try missionary,” she suggested. As soon as he was between her legs and entered her, the number changed to 3.
“Hmm. I would have thought good old basic missionary would be 1, but… hey!” She pointed toward the exit door. The leftmost of 7 lights across the top had lit up.
Janet showed her superior ability to concentrate as Brad slowly slid in and out of her.
“Of course!” she exclaimed, slapping her forehead and accidentally whacking him in the process. “It’s a banana cream pie recipe. Get it? Pie?” she squealed pushing him off and sitting up. Her husband just whimpered and looked confused. “Not pie like you eat, but pi like the number pi. It starts with 3. Look!” She pointed to the circular hints in the pattern of the rug they were on.
“What did we do earlier that registered as 14? Those are the next two digits.”
Her intellectual excitement started to control Brad’s physical excitement and he thought back. “I was underneath, and you were straight on top of me,” he remembered, moving into position. When she lay prone and he slipped inside her, the 14 returned and a second light over the doorway turned on.
“Hmm, that’s too bad. I hoped each light would be a digit, but it looks like we need to find five more positions, however many digits they have. We need to figure out what numbers they assigned them.” She stood up, abandoning his quivering staff, and looked around the room. “Come on, we don’t have much time. We need a book like the Kama Sutra or some sex guide with hundreds of positions. That blow job was 223, wasn’t it?”
“Alright,” he groused “but if we don’t have an answer by two minutes to midnight, we’ll give up and just fuck. Our tradition is more important!”
“Agreed,” she smirked, giving his cock, still swollen and slippery from her juices, a few reassuring pumps. “But let’s find that book!”
Highly motivated, Brad flipped through a few dozen volumes on the shelves before he found it. It contained a seemingly exhaustive—and exhausting, considering the gymnastics involved in some of them—list of positions for lovemaking. Confirming that missionary was 3 and woman prone on top was 14, Janet started looking for particular numbers that were the next digits of pi.
Taking the book with her, she returned to the rug in front of the door. Position 1 was a cowgirl variant but when they did it, it didn’t turn on the next light.
“Next thing to try is 15. You stay on your back, and I’ll sit on you like we’re spooning.” She flipped and lowered herself onto him, but other numbers were displayed. “Hmmph,” she frowned. With his cock deep inside her, she squirmed her ass while she reached for the book and looked at the picture more carefully. “Oh, I see now.”
Brad just did his duty as she bent one leg up across the other, tightening the grip of her cunt on his cock. “Yes!” he exclaimed, more from the bolt of pleasure through his shaft than from recognizing the number 15 appearing and the third light glowing.
Position 92 looked difficult, so they tried 9 first, which just required Brad to bend his knees a little as they stood facing each other so he could enter her. As soon as he slipped inside, the fourth light turned on.
“Oh, honey, I know,” Janet soothed when she moved away as soon as it registered after barely a stroke-and-a-half. “Come on, behind me,” she urged when she descended to the rug on her side for position 26. Lifting her upper leg, she welcomed his leg between hers, giving his cock perfect access to her g-spot.
Entwined, Brad drove into her and Janet turned her head to share a passionate, over-the-shoulder kiss. While their tongues danced, his hand massaged her breasts. Her hips pushed back with a familiar rhythm—the way she liked to have her g-spot probed. Only the chirp of their bracelets as they turned purple, indicating they were both reaching their edges, stopped them from finishing early and failing to escape. The fifth light had long since illuminated.
“Almost there,” she sighed, rolling away. “On your back, knees up,” she instructed. Standing briefly, she squatted to impale herself on his cock. Taking him deeper, she leaned back against his legs; position 53 lit the sixth light.
“Have we done that one before?” Brad wondered aloud. “Remember it. I’d like to try it sometime for more than two seconds,” he laughed.
“One more!” she said hopping off him and consulting the book. “Kneel there.” She lay on her back in front of him, her legs wrapped around him, but position 5 was not the final one.
“I was afraid of that. I guess they saved the hardest for last. Get up,” she directed. Standing in front of him, she put one arm around his shoulder and faced away from him. “You need to lift me up, hands under my thighs.”
When she raised and spread her legs, putting her full weight on him, he wobbled a bit, but backed against the wall to get more stability. With her at the proper height, she reached between her legs with her free hand and pushed his cockhead into her entrance. Fortunately, they didn’t have to hold the position long before it was recognized as number 58. Unfortunately, that did not turn on the final light.
“One more idea before we give up,” she said, squirming out of his arms and onto her feet. “If they rounded the last digit it would be 59, which is like the earlier one from behind, except you’re on top of me.” Face down on the rug, she bent one leg to the side and had him straddle her other leg. When the expected number appeared but the seventh light remained off, she sighed in frustration.
“Nevermind!” she whined. The clock was blinking the two-minute warning. “You’ve been such a good sport, let’s at least do midnight with that one you liked.”
Before he moved, he pulled her face into another hot over-the-shoulder kiss. “Any position with you is all I care about.”
Nonetheless, she wiggled out from under him and pushed him onto his back. He bent his knees up and she squatted over him, sitting fully on his throbbing pole.
“Mmm, that’s good,” she hummed, squirming her butt to take him as deep as possible. “No more positions, I promise. I guess we’re both ready,” she giggled. Their bracelets had turned from purple back to blue with the frustration of trying to turn the last light on.
Brad groaned in satisfaction with his cock finally able to feel the heat of her grip for more than a few seconds. With her feet astride him and her shoulders against his knees, Janet could lift and bounce her ass against his thighs. Given the clearance, he could use his shoulders and feet to meet her motion.
She stroked his chest as he fingered her clit and massaged her breasts. As the seconds ticked down to midnight, their eyes met. Reaching toward each other, they clasped each other’s wrists. With that leverage, they became more energetic, her posting like a show rider and him bucking like a bronco.
Straining and grunting like circus acrobats, they gave in to the lust that had simmered and boiled for the past hour. Lost in their mutual gaze and embrace, the tsunami of ecstasy flooded over and through them. The spasms of their pleasure broke their rhythm and euphoria weakened their muscles as they settled together. The wife leaned forward onto the husband; their legs straightened and intertwined, maximizing contact; their lips performed a tender echo of their more intense coupling.
Eventually, his softening cork slipped out of the enfolding grasp of her warm vessel and allowed their frothy mutual meringue to drip from her genitals onto his. Sharing a shiver of delight and a laugh returned them to the reality that their comingling had overshadowed. In that reality, their bracelets had turned from purple to white, the seventh light had glowed green, the door had unlocked with a click, and separate tones had heralded their success and the moment of midnight.
Between kisses and laughter, Janet chortled, “We should have known that what we needed for the final step was a cream pie!”
They retrieved their clothes and generously tipped the employee who had waited for them to finish, one way or the other. “I didn’t have any big plans, so watching the ball drop on TV from here was no different than doing it from my apartment.”
When Brad and Janet got home, they celebrated the arrival of 2023 in a few more time zones before they bid their last goodbyes to 2022 and fell asleep.
