“Good morning. How are you feeling?” I genuinely asked, as Christy emerged from her drunken slumber, finding me in the kitchen cooking breakfast.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” she snapped back with a precarious look on her face.

“Well, you got shit-faced last night. Guessing you might be hurting a little bit this morning.”

“Does that have anything to do with why your fucking boxers were on the floor next to my bed? What the fuck happened last night, Bo?”

Normally, this is the type of situation that I would be licking my chops over. The better you know someone, the easier it is the fuck with them. And the more potential a particular situation offers, the funnier it can be. Christy was about to have a mental breakdown, and I was just handed a silver platter of absolute hilarity.

However, the reality of the moment was too heavy, and this wasn’t something to fuck around with. Discarding the idiomatic box of gold in my grasp, I looked deep into her eyes, now welling with concern, and told her the truth.

“Nothing.”

Exhaling a sigh of deep relief, she threw her arms around me and fell into my chest. “Oh God, thank you, thank you, thank you,” she professed, “and I wasn’t questing you, just so you know, I was questioning me.”  

Returning the hug, and now back on safe ground, resisting was no longer necessary. “And question yourself you should.” I immediately followed up, “You were begging for it last night.”

“What?” she exclaimed, releasing our hug, “No way. Really?”

“Oh yeah, and you are a dirty little girl when you’re drunk. You were pleading with me, ‘I want your cock in my ass, Bo, fuck my ass, it won’t count. I’ll suck your cock good if you pound my ass with it first. Come on, do me, do me, do me.’ You’re lucky I am such a gentleman and only shoved my thumb up it a couple times. Want some bacon?”

“You dick,” Christy wittingly shot back as she tossed the pair of boxers she had been holding my way. “But seriously, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, but seriously, I don’t do laundry; remember?” I half-jokingly said, tossing the boxers back at her. “Well, I gotta get to work, and looking at this kitchen, so do you. See ya.”

“Yes sir!” she said with just enough sarcasm to make anyone else who might have heard, think it was said tongue in cheek. That is part of her defense mechanism. Christy is known for being a defensive, quick-tempered, take no shit type a chick, but that is merely a façade she puts up to hide her true, submissive nature. Few people know this about her; but I realized as soon as she moved in. I don’t know if it was out of trust, or necessity that she abandoned her façade around me, but she did. She still hands me the TV remote when I enter the room, ensures the house is in order without mention, and you can bet your bottom dollar that those boxer shorts will be clean and folded when I get home. Only when others are around does her guard go up, and she knows she has to keep it up. Because once that submissive cat is out of the bag, she can’t put it back in.    

House looked great when I got home. No evidence of my morning breakfast creation and a small stack of crisply folded clothes sitting on my bed, a particular pair of Mack Weldon boxer shorts right on top. I just need to take care of some bills another responsibility-free weekend could begin. Just as I was logging out of my financial app, my attention turned to the list, seeing that I had left it out on the desk amongst some bank statements. Usually, I only see the list when I pull it out of the drawer to add a name or check one-off, a genuinely positive experience. Most lists, people are trying to complete, the more items that are checked off the better. But those are ‘To-Do Lists’, used to indicate completing undesirable tasks. I considered mine a ‘Get-To-Do List’, and was most happy about it the night I passed it off as the roster of a softball team that I was coaching to some random chick that I had brought home. Looking at it now, there’s not much that I get to do.

With the effort I had been putting into marking Christy off the list, I hadn’t been spending much time adding to it. That, coupled with the fact that the last two additions to the waitstaff were dudes, it was slim. Aside from Christy, only two others remained, Nikki and Susie, and Nikki had moved to Florida about a year ago. I kept her on the list thinking she would get tired of the brutal humidity and the jackass that hauled her down there. But it was time to face facts, one had finally gotten away, and instead of a checkmark, my usually lucky pen drew a thick red line through Nikki’s name. All of sudden, the list was down to two, Christy and, ‘Little Susie’, as she appeared on it.  

Susie was a compact and adorable ball of energy. I had known her longer than any of the others, but she didn’t get added to the list until more recently. I had just moved to town from Michigan and I noticed her and her then-boyfriend getting out of a VW van with licenses plates from back home. I introduced myself and discovered that they had just recently moved to town as well. They were a great couple, that rare type that just looks like they should be together. She was maybe five feet tall with a baby doll face, perma-smile and high cheekbones. Her tiny frame made perfectly proportioned, not thick, not thin, round in all the right areas and spunky. Just an absolute cutie. But she was already with the right guy, and the three of us became good friends. Hell, I even went to their wedding. I never even considered adding her to the list; that is, until a mutual friend at the bar told me that they were getting divorced.

“Ah man, that’s too bad. I always considered them to be the ideal couple,” responding earnestly, as I finished off a bottle of pale ale. “Ah, that’s a damn good beer. Hey, do you know if she spells her name with a ‘Y’ or ‘IE’ at the end?”  

Anyway, I needed to back off from the Christy hunt and meet some new women. I decided that I would go hit the clubs that night, after a pre-game warmup at my usual bar of course. Suzy goes there once in a blue moon, worth a shot. It was Friday night; I liked my chances.

As usual, my local hangout offered nothing more than the magnificently-breasted bartender who had heard all my best one-liners already. There was a band setting up, so maybe I would swing back later. After downing a couple of beers while chatting with some locals, I was ready for a change of scenery. Waiting for my tab, I saw the front door of the bar open, and in walked a particular lady looking about the room as if maybe she had the wrong address. Then our eyes met, and I am sure that mine grew wide and bright exactly the way hers did. When she continued straight to the barstool next to me and we greeted each other, I changed my plans for the night. It wasn’t until much later that I realized it also changed my life forever.

Her name is irrelevant, her appearance you could probably piece together, and why she walked in that bar, on that night, at that exact time, means nothing to anyone, except me.

She was a person that I hadn’t seen in over ten years. And while we never got the chance to know each other well in the past, there was always that thing, that spark, that undeniable, yet indescribable vibe between us. We both knew it. I never made it to the club that night, or ever for that matter. She was as surprised to see me as I her, but we sat and talked for hours. Not to catch up or reminisce, but to finally get to know one another. I didn’t end up with any new names for the list that night, but I did get a phone number, and with it, a new girlfriend.

It was about a month into our relationship when she headed to a family reunion out of state. I had been spending a lot of my free time at her house instead of the bar. So, having a Friday night to myself, I decided to head downtown to the bar and see what I had been missing. Walking in from the parking lot, I ran into a familiar face, and was honestly more amused than anything by the irony of it. I hadn’t even thought about the list since that fateful night a month earlier. I hadn’t cared about it.

“Hey Susie, long time no see.”

She was standing just outside the bar smoking a cigarette, talking to a guy that looked to be at least ten years younger. She was as cute as ever, but I didn’t have the desire, or the energy, to doggedly pursue an elusive piece of ass anymore. Besides, it looked like she already had company for the evening.

“Oh my God, Bo! I have missed you so much. You look great!” she replied while reaching up for a big hug and quick kiss on the lips. “Guess what day it is?”

“Friday?”

“It’s my birthday.”

“Well happy birthday, sweetie,” I told her while still embraced in her arms, catching the scent of a few cocktails, “What are you doing for your big day?”

“Looking for someone to take me home and fuck the shit out of me.” Her voice now soft and sultry, and her jovial expression replaced with a skull probing stare as she said it.

She was dead fucking serious. The guy I had assumed she was with, casually snuffed out his smoke and walked inside.

“Who was that?” I asked, not taking my eyes from hers.

“He’s just a friend,” she confirmed, her deep gaze easing only slightly, “he just came down to buy me a birthday drink.”

My mind began to have thoughts outside of my immediate surroundings, away from the here and now of the situation I was in. Sometimes you just have to listen to your inner self, and respond accordingly after considering both the possibilities and future ramifications of your immediate actions.

And sometimes, you just have to shut that no-fun-having conscience down before it even gets started.

“Get in the truck, birthday girl. I’m driving.”

It’s only a five-minute drive from the bar to my house, exactly two-point-two miles having measured it in the past. What I didn’t know before that night, was that it took only nine-tenths of a mile for me to go from fairly flaccid to full-on raging hardon when driving thirty miles per hour. Susie had my dick out of my pants before we left the parking lot.

“I’ve wanted to suck and fuck your cock for so long,” she admitted while licking me scrotum-to-tip and tickling my balls, “Leah told me all about it. I used to fuck her too you know.”

Leah was a real good friend of hers, who I fooled around with a few years ago. I felt bad ending it, as she liked me a whole lot, but it wasn’t going to be. She had told me about her sex with Susie, but only after I had stopped fucking her. I think she was trying to get me back into the bedroom, using the possibility of a threesome with Susie as bait. I have to admit, it almost worked.

After popping my now swollen tip in and out of her mouth a few times, she added, “I bet she never sucked your dick like this.” Her mouth then launched a full-frontal assault on my defenseless manhood, causing me to miss the turn leading to my own fucking house.

The inside lights were off when I pulled into the driveway, we would have the place to ourselves.  Susie didn’t seem to realize we had arrived. She was too busy bobbing for cum balls from the passenger floorboard. Her head aggressively jouncing up and down, her tongue swirling round and round, she emitted carnal sounds of hunger that I don’t know how to spell. I put the truck in park and left the engine running. We weren’t getting out until birthday girl got the belly full a cum that she was working so vigorously to receive.

“I just tasted a little, Bo,” she throws her mouth back on sucking harder, “I want it all, cum for me, Bo.”

I wasn’t exactly close yet, so thought a good dishonest challenge might provide some motivation that be both would benefit from.

“Leah could swallow me whole,” I said, lying to her.

“Challenge accepted!” without stopping or saying a word, but by driving her head down deeper than before.

“Take it all baby, go slow if you need to, but I want to feel your nose digging into me.”

She continued to shove her head down on my shaft, slower but harder, her choking became louder until she gagged and lifted up. “oh fuck, almost, so close” she said as a cord of saliva hung from her chin, “help me this time, and don’t let me up until I get it all in me.”

As she began to devour me, I obliged, pushing her head into my crotch with moderate and steady pressure. She offered no resistance as she heroically gagged louder and louder. I moaned with appreciation when her lips reached the base of my tool, her nose prodding my pelvis. As my cock reached the nadir of its journey, my balls began to motor up and I thrusted my hips at her face, solidifying the landing. I released the pressure of my hand, guided her off of me as to afford her for two deep, well-earned breaths, and then returned her lips to the hilt of my sword, pulling her down into me while lifting my bare ass from the seat to close any gap that remained.

The liquid from my balls, compressed against its escape hatch, worked like a battering ram, pounding on a gate at the brink collapse, before finally breaking free and sending shockwaves through my body before launching into the convulsing mouth attached to me. The sounds of her gagging morphed into a deep and repeated gulp, as I hold her head into my lap and release load after load of my protein cream deep into her throat.

“Oh Fuckinggggg GOD…oughhhgghg. Holy Fucking SHIT!…’childish, uncontrolled giggling’.. you just blew my fucking loafer off,” I said, or tried to say, realizing I was now missing a shoe.

Lifting herself off of me, she joined me in a brief fit of laughter, before our mouths meet aggressively above the center console. Our tongues danced, wrestled, and boxed one another until she latched onto mine with her suction cup of a mouth. I offered no resistance as she pulled her face from mine, stretching my tongue to the point where I could see it beyond the tip of my nose. She then released it from her hold, and my now elongated mouth-muscle gently recoiled back to where she found it.

“Wow, that was pretty cool,” I acknowledged, “I never realized my tongue could extend out that far.”

“You do know,” she said, reaching for the passenger door handle, “let’s get inside and see what you can do with it.”

“I have to find my shoe first.”

Wanting a shower first, we quickly stripped out of our clothes and jumped in together. It was the first time seeing her in all her glory. No need for the overused cliché, because her body was exactly like I had imagined. Her calves matched her thighs, which matched her apple of an ass. Her pussy trimmed with a defining patch of light brown hair, lead to a midriff that gave reason for the existence of string bikinis. Perched on a five-foot frame, her B-sized breasts looked perfectly at home with their quarter-sized areolas, and punctuated with eraser-like nipples. She was a wonderful woman, but her little body was simply a toy of perfection.

The shower was quicker than the preceding paragraph, we were in and out and quick to bed. Her half of the first inning complete, it was my turn at the plate, and I proved hungry. As I explored every nook and cranny of her appetite-satisfying pussy, Susie gently rocked her hips and hummed sounds that suggested that it was she who was enjoying a mouth full of deliciousness. With her neck arched back, she pinched and pulled her nipples, submitting the rest of her body to the man between her thighs. Her humming transposed into a chorus of moans, and the rocking of her hips evolved into pelvic thrusts. Notes of laughter were added to the score, as she rudely requested my cock.

“Oh Bo, I so want your dick right now. I want it deep in me….oooh…come on…..I’m going to cum, please fuck me…I need it now…”

While my cock was more than ready, I had waited a long time for this, so a few more minutes wasn’t going to matter to me. I had some newly discovered length in this tongue of mine, and defiantly, I kept using it. Grabbing each palm-sized ass cheek I pulled her entire body to my face while thrusting my tongue deep towards her cervix. She moaned loudly, and realizing her demand would go unmet for now, grabbed the back of my head, pulling it into her helping me try to reach it. Her midsection began to convulse as her head and neck arched further back, her thighs spasmodically clutched and released the sides of face repeated. She then erupted into a vulgar and nonsensical vocal outburst, while trying with all her might to dislodge me from the geyser erupting between her legs. I silently counted to ten, then released her from my hold.

The first inning, now complete, score tied, 1-1.

I gave her just enough time to catch her breath and remember her own name before I complied to her request from moments ago. With one motion, I flipped her onto her stomach and lifted her hips into the air, her knees now supporting her, and slid into her from behind. What followed was a two-hour fuckfest which produced multiple more orgasms from each of us. The sight of her amenable body, as I alone bounced it up and down on my cock while she straddled me, is etched in my mind forever. But we were now done, our bodies vacant of anything left to share.

After lying motionless together for a while, I got up to get us some needed hydration. Returning with two tall glasses of straight ice water, I see her getting dressed, and told her that she was welcome to spend the night if she wanted.

“Thanks, but I just called a cab,” she stated, “I need to wake up in my own bed. It’s been a long day, and I’m meeting Leah for brunch in the morning. Tomorrow is her birthday. Boy, is she going to lose her shit when I tell her what I got for mine.”

“Blame it on her if she gets too pissed. She’s the one who made you want to ride my dick by bragging about it so much,” I suggested.

“Oh, that won’t work. She’s read all of my diaries, so she knows that I wrote your name in one of them years ago, long before she knew either of us.”

“Seriously? What did I do to end up in your diary?”

“You didn’t do anything, well except introduce yourself and tell me that you were from Michigan out in front of that breakfast place one day.”

“What else did you put in there about me?”

“Nothing, just your name. I wanted to make sure that I didn’t forget it. So, I wrote it down in a special place where I keep other names of certain people that I want to remember.”

“Let me guess, all male names?”

“Oh no, don’t be silly. Leah’s name is in there,” she replied as she walked past my desk on the way to the bathroom. “Oh hey, do mind if I grab this pen? I wanted to sign her card in red, but the one I have is out of ink. I promise to give it back the next time I see you.”

“Touché,” realizing that sometimes the hunter does indeed get captured by the game, “go ahead, keep it. I don’t need it.”

“Touché? Touché what?” ‘honk-honk’, “Oh, that’s my cab, gotta run. Thanks for a fantastic birthday, Bo. Oh, and for the pen.”

“I wonder if that pen will recognize my name when it sees it…”