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Things YOU DID that NO MOTHERFUCKER would BELIEVE!!!

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Burquette
Bug
1. I worked at NASA.
2. I've ridden on the back of an elephant
3. I've spoken in tongues
4. A drug-addled, paranoid guy once gave me (me?!?!) a baggie of cocaine to hide, so I did.
5. I gave my wife a deer head as a gift.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by Burquette
1. I worked at NASA.
2. I've ridden on the back of an elephant
3. I've spoken in tongues
4. A drug-addled, paranoid guy once gave me (me?!?!) a baggie of cocaine to hide, so I did.
5. I gave my wife a deer head as a gift.



I really am interested in hearing about the speaking in tongues. What happened!?

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by vanessa26
Went without uttering one single word for over 2 months
Had a really long conversation with Mrs America ( 1990 ) which was mostly just me telling her how much she looked like my Barbie ( I was like 3ish )
Started talking only a couple of months after I was born
could spell every single curse word in the book by age 4
had to jump out of the way of a moving train ( after I had just gotten done quoting Stand By me )
Went two weeks without eating just to see if I could.
ate several poison Mushrooms at age 3 while pretending to be Alice in Wonderland
rode my bike on a roof of a business ( long story )
got beaten half to death by a group of 5 people who were on some serious drugs



Holy crap, girl, you should be dead! You must have a protective spirit as well.

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
Burquette
Bug
Quote by Simmerdownchick



I really am interested in hearing about the speaking in tongues. What happened!?


I was part of a Pentecostal charismatic church for a while. On Sunday nights, they would have "blow outs" where you pray and sing until everyone gets to a heightened emotional state. People were laying on hands and praying on me. It was a strange kind of self-induced trance...that's the best way I can describe it. I was trying to pray and gibberish was coming out. It was almost euphoric and the after-affect was almost like afterglow.

They said I was filled with the Holy Spirit, but I don't know that it wasn't more of a type of mass hysteria. Others were dancing, some people yelling....
ScreamQueen
living dead girl
Quote by Simmerdownchick


Me too, I really know I have a spirit protector or guardian angel. I looked up some of the things he did, and I am so lucky....


James Gregory Marlow was sentenced to death in 1989



Did you ever watch Unsolved Mysteries with Robert Stack? to this day it haunts me
and its made me one paranoid person
You are very lucky!
Denim_Daisy10
Southern Barefoot Angel
1.never got to know my birth father which people find amazing my mom was close to 9 months pregnant with me when he was killed in the line of duty (he was a Virginia state trooper) and 11 days after is murder I made my entrance into this world and my mom swears to this day she saw him standing in the corner of the hospital room watching over us .
2. I share the same birthday with NY giants QB Eli Manning just different years.
Verbal
Gravelly-Voiced Fucker
Mine isn't nearly as cool/scary as most of these. That serial killer thing is crazy.

When I moved to New York City I hitch-hiked there from Iowa. Via Canada, around the Great Lakes. Took about two weeks. Insanely fun.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by vanessa26



Did you ever watch Unsolved Mysteries with Robert Stack? to this day it haunts me
and its made me one paranoid person
You are very lucky!



I used to watch that all the time! I also listen to creepy pastas and "Let's not Meet' stories on youtube. Shit! People are scarier than any ghost could possibly be

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by Verbal
Mine isn't nearly as cool/scary as most of these. That serial killer thing is crazy.

When I moved to New York City I hitch-hiked there from Iowa. Via Canada, around the Great Lakes. Took about two weeks. Insanely fun.


That is something I wish I could have done. I am so jealous. Very cool.

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by Denim_Daisy10
1.never got to know my birth father which people find amazing my mom was close to 9 months pregnant with me when he was killed in the line of duty (he was a Virginia state trooper) and 11 days after is murder I made my entrance into this world and my mom swears to this day she saw him standing in the corner of the hospital room watching over us .
2. I share the same birthday with NY giants QB Eli Manning just different years.



I absolutely believe she did see him. I'm a STRONG believer in the afterlife. That is a very sad and sweet story~ (((HUGS)))

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
NawtyGuy504
Active Ink Slinger
Flew 3 support missions for the USAF Thunder Birds. The Navy has Fat Albert permanently assigned and painted in the Blue Angles, Blue and Yellow Gold paint scheme. The Air Force assigned Thunder Bird support missions based a Wing's performance. The wing assigned it to one of its squadrons based on their performance. The squadron chose the particular aircraft and flight crew based on performance.

Nawty
Simmerdownchick
Creator
Quote by Jonathans_Fantasies
Well does rolling your car off the side of a 100 foot cliff in a blinding snowstorm count? Because that's how I got out of work one day! LOL! I didn't see the semi ahead of me until I was damn near part of it. I slammed on the brakes to keep from getting killed and then I started spinning. I went over the side rolled a few times and ended up kicking my way through what was left of the sunroof to get out.

Thank God I was wearing my seatbelt that morning. The real funny thing is that my wife (Sugarbaby) had a dream that night that I was involved in a car accident, so when I came home and woke her up, it scared her half to death! She thought I was a ghost!



That is crazy! You're so lucky to be alive!

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
Simmerdownchick
Creator
5. I was diagnosed with Cardiomyopathy in January 2012. My heart function was at 20% the day I went into the hospital. I got up on New Years day and told my family I was going to the ER. An Angel was sitting on the side of my bed that morning. I am sure it was my grandmother. I have since had stem cell therapy and I am asymptomatic now. It saved my life.

6. fell in front of Bono's house near Cork, Ireland. We were driving by his gate (which is super cool, it has the words to 'ONE LOVE' and a whole bunch of other stuff written on it). Anyway, I was like 'Stop the car!!" I got out, and as I was about to take a picture, the gate began to open, so, of course I thought I was about to meet the man himself. Instead it was another guy, and in his thick Irish brogue he said 'I don't mind ya takin' pictures, but can ya not block the drive?" So I agreed and began to back up, then tripped over the cobblestone road and my camera snapped photos as I fell. Sky, sky, sky, curb...


Ok, last one
7. When I was 17 years old I was a HUGE Beatles fan. Still am. On the morning of December 8, 1980, I was getting ready for work when this thought just hit me. "One of the Beatlescould die today and we won't know about it for hours." I considered all of them, George lived n Henly on Thames and he'd be hard to get to. Paul is in Scotland most likely (he was in London I found out later) and Ringo but who would want to kill him? I knew John Lennon was going to die that day and even woke my sister up to tell her. The feeling stayed with me all day, I couldn't shake it, so, that night when I saw the news I was in total shock. That's the only premonition I've ever had but it was so real. I swear on my life it's true.

I have three famous stories, 2 recommended reads and have come in the top ten in two competitions~ Come in and make yourself at home.
trinket
Convict
Quote by Jonathans_Fantasies
Well does rolling your car off the side of a 100 foot cliff in a blinding snowstorm count? Because that's how I got out of work one day! LOL! I didn't see the semi ahead of me until I was damn near part of it. I slammed on the brakes to keep from getting killed and then I started spinning. I went over the side rolled a few times and ended up kicking my way through what was left of the sunroof to get out.

Thank God I was wearing my seatbelt that morning. The real funny thing is that my wife (Sugarbaby) had a dream that night that I was involved in a car accident, so when I came home and woke her up, it scared her half to death! She thought I was a ghost!


Didn't you guys have a serious altercation with a moose one time? I hear the moose came off second-best.
SeaSiren
Active Ink Slinger
I shot a man. He broke into my house.
Guest
Lurker
Yes we did. Both those times Jon was driving.

Me, I'm a excellent driver.
ScreamQueen
living dead girl
Quote by Simmerdownchick



I used to watch that all the time! I also listen to creepy pastas and "Let's not Meet' stories on youtube. Shit! People are scarier than any ghost could possibly be



I love LOVE creepy pasta and yeah I totally agree with you..I once lived in a extremely haunted apartment
things would fly off the shelves, weird sounds, amongst many things yet I was more afraid to leave the apartment because of people.
Guest
Lurker
I was diagnosed terminally ill 19 years ago, but was discharged by my oncologist 5 years ago. Does that count as something I did, or is it just something that happened to me?
Guest
Lurker
Reading this thread makes life seem relatively uneventful (queue immense gratitude) and on other mentions, boring (still have plenty of time)!!
doctorlove
Active Ink Slinger
bunch of pussies....I have seen and done shit that makes most people cry like babies
NOLAHotGal
Active Ink Slinger
When I was 17 I was dating a guy 8 years older than me. Two months into our relationship I became his submissive sex slave. About a month later he took me to a 3 day gang bang. I was NOT forced to do anything. He offered to bring me home with no consequences if I did not want to stay. I was so turned on I stayed and fucked 7 guys multiple times the first night and ate my first cunt full of my boyfriends cum. I had many more first in the 3 days of my first gang bang. Before the weekend was over I had fucked over 20 guys and played with 5 women. My last gang bang was a couple weeks ago. There has been many more in between.

Brandie
Liz
Scarlet Seductress
Quote by doctorlove
bunch of pussies....I have seen and done shit that makes most people cry like babies


Did you watch Kung Fu Panda 2? That bit where Po finds out that Lord Shen killed his parents...
Sinnerman
Active Ink Slinger
I once crossed a road when the traffic signal was like below ... There was no traffic that I could see but even still, I broke into a cold sweat about halfway across .I kept my nerve and made it to the other side ... Fucking scary stuff I'll tell ya


LK213
Mountain Wolf
I was backpacking in the wilderness maybe 10 miles from anyone and set up camp, later that night or wee hours of the morning I awoke to sniffing and noises around my tent. When morning light came on I looked and had mountain lion tracks all around the tent. So thinking it was best to move camp I found a different spot maybe 2 miles away. As always i hung my food in a tree, cooked 100 yards away from camp and went to bed. A very quiet night and was glad of it. Till the next morning when I walked around camp and saw all the fresh bear tracks! Decided it was time to head back home. Was not going to tempt fate a third time....
Shannon3K
Una chica rubia caliente
Quote by trinket

I kept my mouth closed for 4 hours today.


This is simply not true!