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If you came with instructions what would it say

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Must be over 18 to look at and 21 to use
Quote by trinket

"duct tape her mouth"

No label required for that

Do not look him directly in the eyes.
May explode
Make sure you know how to turn it off when you turn it on.
Careful, I'm wild and kinky!
Click below to see

If you treat me like shit, watch your step.
Quote by heidi
May explode


hahah love this, i could use it easily for myself as well
"she will bite your head off for dishonesty, in any form."
I'll give you a second chance, but never a third.

Quote by ThisPing4U
I'll give you a second chance, but never a third.



Except me, he gives me hundreds smile



DOES NOT INSURE FOR PERSONAL INJURY
Soft and sweet, but may develop local hardness when handled by females
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.


Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
To achieve optimal performance from your Emerson model no. 501, adhere to the following guidelines:
1. If you notice your Emerson has a hard on, give him a blowjob.
2. If your Emerson doesn't have a hard on, give him some popcorn
2a. If popcorn is unavailable, a sandwich and/or beer will suffice.
Check out my latest - a humorous collaboration with trinket and a Recommended Read
Has a fuse that will wrap around the world a billion times, but once you light the fuse....RUN!! Better still just dont light the fuse coz you cant move that quick!.
Quote by Emerson501
To achieve optimal performance from your Emerson model no. 501, adhere to the following guidelines:
1. If you notice your Emerson has a hard on, give him a blowjob.
2. If your Emerson doesn't have a hard on, give him some popcorn
2a. If popcorn is unavailable, a sandwich and/or beer will suffice.



No no no! Everybody knows the sammich comes after the blowjob. Keep it real.
Quote by trinket



No no no! Everybody knows the sammich comes after the blowjob. Keep it real.


I like Mexican food after sex. Gimme a burrito rather than a sandwich
Fragile. Handle with love
Caution. Deeper than anticipated.
batteries not included
Quote by vivien
batteries not included


Great film!

*danger*
Unwrapping may cause sarcasm, uncontrollable laughter or a kick arse mentality. Use with discretion.
Enter at your own risk
Quote by heidi
Enter at your own risk


Good one!

....................................................................

Caution: Complicated Machinery
not all blondes are intellectually challenged
Some assembly required