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Nisha’s Notes on Narrative.

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These are just my thoughts and do not represent the views of the Admins, or my fellow mods, but I thought I’d share them as advice to new, aspiring, or developing writers - take them or leave them!

I’ve read hundreds of stories here on Lush, and there are some key elements that separate the wheat from the chaff. I’m not talking about accurate grammar and punctuation, which we can take as a given, so much as story construction and character development, and that’s what I would like to discuss here.

What is a story? Think of any story, be it Harry Potter, Star Wars, or Pride and Prejudice, and you will notice that they all have certain things in common. They all have one or more characters who go on a ‘quest’ of some sort, and is/are changed as a result of the ‘journey’ they have been on. They often have flaws or weaknesses (Kryptonite, Harry Potter’s scar, etc.) and these often put the quest in peril. The reader’s satisfaction comes from seeing the characters develop as people, overcoming their weakness to triumph at the end. Throughout the tale, the characters, not the action, remain the most important element of the story. Sure, there are exceptions, but that’s the general ‘formula’.

My point is that erotic stories should broadly follow the same pattern. Microfiction, Flash Erotica, and poetry will differ, but a longer story will usually have most of the above elements, and the story will have a clear beginning, middle, and end, rather than being just a series of loosely cobbled together events.

Key to this is characterisation, and this is where many writers could improve their stories, in my opinion. Sticking with Harry Potter, why do we as readers empathise with him, and become invested in his quest? The answer is that he is like us at the start; uninitiated, naïve, and relatable. He is keen to get out of his current, unfortunate circumstances and realise his potential. The same goes for Luke Skywalker, Jane Eyre, or any of a thousand central characters. Roald Dahl had it down to a tee! These characters represent ‘us’ in the story, with all our flaws and insecurities, and that is the key to our interest in them and their success.

So, getting back to Lush, if I read about a character called Bob, where the only description I’m given is the length of his cock, or Sue, whose vital statistics are all I know about her, why should I care about what they do? What follows will not be a story, but a description of two people having sex, which is not the same thing. Even worse, it will likely be highly improbable sex, which brings me to my final point.

By developing a three-dimensional character with desires, feelings, and motivations, your story becomes more plausible. Let’s face it, much of the sex in erotic stories veers between the highly unlikely and the borderline unfeasible, so we need to lead our reader to that point in the story carefully. Key to that is a character’s motivation; what do they want, and why do they want it? How many stories have we read here where two people being in the same room is deemed sufficient motivation for them to fuck? It may be, but only if we already know that they are both highly sexed, have been locked in prison for five years, and have already been conducting a torrid affair by correspondence. Then it makes sense. See the point I’m making?

What I don’t want to do is encourage everyone on Lush to write in a formulaic or repetitive way, and nor am I saying that the above is the ‘correct’ way to write. There are plenty of good stories which don’t follow these ‘rules’, and I’m sure you will suggest a few in response to this. But in my experience as a mod on Lush, investing more time in characterisation, and developing a clear structure to the story are the two ‘quick wins’ that many writers would benefit from focusing on.

‘The pious fable and the dirty story
Share in the total literary glory.’

W.H. Auden

All excellent points, Nisha. If you don't mind, I'll hijack this thread to offer one further technique.

As well as character / motivation mentioned above, one other element that can take writing to the next level is the story structure.

Stories do not have to be told linearly.

Unless you're writing for Disney, the "once upon a time..." approach is often not the most appropriate for engagement. Don't be afraid to experiment. Perhaps start in the middle of some action and then reel out to give context (consider how Tarantino does this in Reservoir Dogs). Weave backstory elements into how the characters interact.

Does one person hesitate when about to spank someone else? That can be used to delve into the reason why. E.g. A negative previous experience. Fear of rejection. Timidness they're trying to overcome. This doesn't have to be front-loaded.

Such exploration gives characters more depth, allows you to provide context for the situation and people's motives, and provides a brief pause in the action to build anticipation.

Starting a story with something dramatic, like a smashing plate or an argument, immediately draws readers in. They want to know why, so you can then expand upon how the situation developed. Use flashbacks or moments of contemplation or dialogue in the heat of the moment to keep the story moving.

If you have a bunch of story beats in your head when you start, play with them. Chuck them up in the air and put them in a different order, then find a way to connect them and keep the flow intact and logical so readers can still follow it all.

There are a zillion ways to add drama, tension and intrigue to Tab A goes in Slot B. Mix things up and have fun.

Over one million views on my stories can't be wrong, so please dive in and browse my 148 stories:


* 31 Editor's Picks, 84 Recommended Reads.
* 16 competition podium places, 12 other times in the top ten.
* 23 collaborations.
* A whole heap of often filthy, tense, hot sex.

Quote by WannabeWordsmith

All excellent points, Nisha. If you don't mind, I'll hijack this thread to offer one further technique.

As well as character / motivation mentioned above, one other element that can take writing to the next level is the story structure.

Stories do not have to be told linearly.

Unless you're writing for Disney, the "once upon a time..." approach is often not the most appropriate for engagement. Don't be afraid to experiment. Perhaps start in the middle of some action and then reel out to give context (consider how Tarantino does this in Reservoir Dogs). Weave backstory elements into how the characters interact.

Does one person hesitate when about to spank someone else? That can be used to delve into the reason why. E.g. A negative previous experience. Fear of rejection. Timidness they're trying to overcome.

Such exploration gives characters more depth, allows you to provide context for the situation and people's motives, and provides a brief pause in the action to build anticipation.

Starting a story with something dramatic, like a smashing plate or an argument, immediately draws readers in. They want to know why, so you can then expand upon how the situation developed. Use flashbacks or moments of contemplation or dialogue in the heat of the moment to keep the story moving.

If you have a bunch of story beats in your head when you start, play with them. Chuck them up in the air and put them in a different order, then find a way to connect them and keep the flow intact and logical so readers can still follow it all.

There are a zillion ways to add drama, tension and intrigue to Tab A goes in Slot B. Mix things up and have fun.

So true, WW. As long as moving backwards and forwards in time is clearly signposted, and doesn’t leave the reader confused, it can be a good tool to avoid the formulaic approach I touched on. X

‘The pious fable and the dirty story
Share in the total literary glory.’

W.H. Auden

Quote by WannabeWordsmith
Starting a story with something dramatic, like a smashing plate or an argument, immediately draws readers in.

I would argue, though, that it's a well you can go to too often. If every story starts this way, the impact gets dulled. Mix things up in your corpus, in other words.

Sometimes opening with a less dramatic scene that establishes a character or situation gets you further in the long haul. And fits better with some styles of stories, too.

Will likely have more thoughts as I digest this thread. Like this, Nisha. We need more actual discussion about actual writing here.

A strange little something for Halloween.

Strange Rites

Quote by Seeker4
If every story starts this way...

I don't think anyone would advocate starting every story the same! I certainly don't do that.

The point is that there's more than one way to tell a story, and thinking about character development, structure, dialogue and narrative flow can make things more interesting to the reader than 2000 words of world-building before anything happens.

Over one million views on my stories can't be wrong, so please dive in and browse my 148 stories:


* 31 Editor's Picks, 84 Recommended Reads.
* 16 competition podium places, 12 other times in the top ten.
* 23 collaborations.
* A whole heap of often filthy, tense, hot sex.

Great post, Nisha! I’m digesting everything y’all have said and I hope all writers read this.

I also like characters with flaws.

Also, you don’t have to have big tits a tiny waist and perfect bubble butt to be sexy. A man doesn’t have to have a 8-inch cock to be a good lover. I think the best stories written are those that don’t focus on that stuff, but still find a way to be very sexy. Great sex can start with the mind, right?

Kindness is contagious. Spread it! ❤️

Quote by KimmiBeGood

Great post, Nisha! I’m digesting everything y’all have said and I hope all writers read this.

I also like characters with flaws.

Also, you don’t have to have big tits a tiny waist and perfect bubble butt to be sexy. A man doesn’t have to have a 8-inch cock to be a good lover. I think the best stories written are those that don’t focus on that stuff, but still find a way to be very sexy. Great sex can start with the mind, right?

Absolutely! I much prefer writing real women and men much more than beauties and beaus. X

‘The pious fable and the dirty story
Share in the total literary glory.’

W.H. Auden

Quote by KimmiBeGood

Great post, Nisha! I’m digesting everything y’all have said and I hope all writers read this.

I also like characters with flaws.

Also, you don’t have to have big tits a tiny waist and perfect bubble butt to be sexy. A man doesn’t have to have a 8-inch cock to be a good lover. I think the best stories written are those that don’t focus on that stuff, but still find a way to be very sexy. Great sex can start with the mind, right?

I will stop and really read for a character that’s not the norm. My writing mentor once said every great character has a flaw that runs against type.

Let that freak flag fly!

Thanks for sharing your insights. I'm enlightened and now see a better direction for my unfinished stories. While they have different plots and characters I find the story itself boring. I'm definitely following this thread. 🌻

Quote by NishasWorld

These are just my thoughts and do not represent the views of the Admins, or my fellow mods, but I thought I’d share them as advice to new, aspiring, or developing writers - take them or leave them!

I’ve read hundreds of stories here on Lush, and there are some key elements that separate the wheat from the chaff. I’m not talking about accurate grammar and punctuation, which we can take as a given, so much as story construction and character development, and that’s what I would like to discuss here.

What a wonderful post, Nisha, and I agree with every word you say. As it states on my profile, character-driven erotica is my thing. I want readers to fall in love with, or resent, the often flawed characters I create. 😊

My beautiful Nisha. ❤️ I agree completely. Sex is always context, a question needs an answer for a million reasons. This is life. You like someone, how do I show this? He is handsome, will he fulfil my needs? If sex is always the answer, what is the question?

So when I see 1,000 words of... fucking. 2,000, maybe 3,000 (can they write that much?)

No, I would rather masturbate over a shade of white drying on a wall.

It is not... I wake up and I want sex. I am a slut. I miss cock. Never happens. I know some total sluts, they need a reason. We would rather masturbate, and if you men think you have really dirty fantasies? Us women? Ours are fucking perverted.

Find a reason.

Women are empathetic, we have intuition. There is a secret society that men do not understand, the underground railway of saving our sisters who are naïve, and intuition as the basic feminism we are born with. Or we are smart and we will break your balls - pick your poison. Any man, the supreme alpha male who could impregnate you with a glimmer in his eyes, women saw him coming yesterday.

You want sex? Base reason... she wants a kid, everything else is pleasure. Big questions are... because I love him (or her), or, I like him and I need to really understand him. Or, my husband wants to see me like this. Or, my friend is getting fucked silly, and I want some too. Reasons, reasons, reasons, sensible and stupid.

Always questions, always motivated. We are not ragdolls, blow up dolls, or a hole in the wood shed.

Even when I was so horny and I had to get some sex, I had to have a reason to like them, just a little bit, enough to fuck them.

I pay homage, Nisha, thank you. When you write and I write, we have reasons!

This is my collection of muses and stories. Stories of note include:

Little Bird - A true story of submission and dominance set in Paris between an older couple and their younger lover.

Le Weekend - Six lives intertwined during one weekend create events that change their lives forever.

Quote by AmuseBouche

My beautiful Nisha. ❤️ I agree completely. Sex is always context, a question needs an answer for a million reasons. This is life. You like someone, how do I show this? He is handsome, will he fulfil my needs? If sex is always the answer, what is the question?

So when I see 1,000 words of... fucking. 2,000, maybe 3,000 (can they write that much?)

No, I would rather masturbate over a shade of white drying on a wall.

It is not... I wake up and I want sex. I am a slut. I miss cock. Never happens. I know some total sluts, they need a reason. We would rather masturbate, and if you men think you have really dirty fantasies? Us women? Ours are fucking perverted.

Find a reason.

Women are empathetic, we have intuition. There is a secret society that men do not understand, the underground railway of saving our sisters who are naïve, and intuition as the basic feminism we are born with. Or we are smart and we will break your balls - pick your poison. Any man, the supreme alpha male who could impregnate you with a glimmer in his eyes, women saw him coming yesterday.

You want sex? Base reason... she wants a kid, everything else is pleasure. Big questions are... because I love him (or her), or, I like him and I need to really understand him. Or, my husband wants to see me like this. Or, my friend is getting fucked silly, and I want some too. Reasons, reasons, reasons, sensible and stupid.

Always questions, always motivated. We are not ragdolls, blow up dolls, or a hole in the wood shed.

Even when I was so horny and I had to get some sex, I had to have a reason to like them, just a little bit, enough to fuck them.

I pay homage, Nisha, thank you. When you write and I write, we have reasons!

Thank you, lovely. You put it so much better than I did! 😘X

‘The pious fable and the dirty story
Share in the total literary glory.’

W.H. Auden

Everything has a reason behind it. Everything, no matter how small. As I told Nisha over PM, this genre is made for internal conflict. The way most of us came up causes some hang up with sex or another.

Look at your TV shows, movies and novels. Before the action goes down, there is a reason for it. The conflict is internal or external. Can be both. What are obstacles that can possibly get in the way and what are the ways around them? I am trying to get better at these things myself as i find the topic of story so fascinating. Good writing can make almost anything enjoyable to consume.

Whiplash was about a fucking drummer trying to make it. You give a fuck about drumming? Probably not. You gave a fuck about dude's passion and the obstacle in his way - JK Simmons' character.

Island Getaway Comp(2nd place): Fucked In The Head

My last published story: Deliciously Assumptious

Quote by CarltonStJames

Everything has a reason behind it. Everything, no matter how small. As I told Nisha over PM, this genre is made for internal conflict. The way most of us came up causes some hang up with sex or another.

Look at your TV shows, movies and novels. Before the action goes down, there is a reason for it. The conflict is internal or external. Can be both. What are obstacles that can possibly get in the way and what are the ways around them? I am trying to get better at these things myself as i find the topic of story so fascinating. Good writing can make almost anything enjoyable to consume.

Whiplash was about a fucking drummer trying to make it. You give a fuck about drumming? Probably not. You gave a fuck about dude's passion and the obstacle in his way - JK Simmons' character.

Internal conflict! That's the phrase at the tip of my tongue.hahaha Thanks for helping this slow brain and sharing your thoughts. 😊

Quote by WannabeWordsmith
Stories do not have to be told linearly.

Adding a small caveat: They do tend to be read that way. From start to finish, one word, sentence, and paragraph at a time. Even if you want to chop and toss the chronology, the reading experience should still flow clearly and smoothly in a linear (or at least coherent) presentation so that the reader is able as they go along to discern the cause-effect relations that make up a plot.

Don't believe everything that you read.

Quote by AmuseBouche
I would rather masturbate over a shade of white drying on a wall.

So that's why my stories are so popular -- I've cornered a niche market. I'll have to start writing again. There's a lot of wall out there needs covering and I've got the literary paint to do it.

(I also agree with everything you said)