You’ve heard of that alien from Venus
Might be fun to have her ‘tween us
She had four boobs
External fallopian tubes
But teeth in her vagina - how heinous.
Jack was nimble and so very quick
Mary never bothered with a bra
Her life was just la di da
She bounced here and there
With nary a care
Keeping the neighborhood boys in awe.
You've heard of that alien from Venus
There was an old codger named Wright
Who claimed he invented flight
"Bullshit," said Gore
I did it and more
And Ben wasnt flying that kite
A vicious old whore from Albania
There was an old codger named Wright
Who claimed he invented flight
"Bullshit," said Gore
Withdrawal, according to Freud
Isn’t something to be enjoyed
It leaves one alone
Perhaps in mid-moan
Most unsavory finished employed.
There was an old codger named Wright
Exhausted on a bench in a park
Lay there until it got dark
Policewoman said "Scoot!"
And gave him the boot
While pausing to survey his landmark
Withdrawal, according to Freud
A sassy young lass from Illinois
Said “I’d rather a man than a boy.”
I need to be filled
A shy young girl gave him a smile
"I could easily ride that for a mile"
Doggie or cowgirl
Just slide on my pearl
A shy young girl gave him a smile
"I could easily ride that for a mile"
A young lad with a very large dick
was told, "My God, you really are half prick."
He stroked it with pride
Onlookers wide-eyed
A young lad with a very large dick
was told, "My God, you really are half prick."
We sat watching on a quiet beach
Wondering why it was just out of reach
I met a sweet gal from Nebraska
Followed me all the way to Alaska
A middle aged man named Sam
Scammed many a girl with his flimflam
A trader at the N.Y.S.E.
Enjoyed play that involved his pee
His aim was amiss
Hit where one should kiss
But shudda missed the bosses goatee
Others look askance at his habit
A trader at the N.Y.S.E.
Enjoyed play that involved his pee
His aim was amiss
Mary Jones liked sucking on bones
She delights in the thrusts and the groans
When it gets nice and hard
She coats it with lard
And slips it to parts unknown
A trader at the N.Y.S.E.
Mary Jones liked sucking on bones
She delights in the thrusts and the groans
Roses are red
Its not our desire
To belittle friend Rob
Or cast ‘im to the briar
Just the opposite is true-
A sign of affection
To tease without mercy
His perpetual erection
A way to acknowledge
His anguished petitions,
His mournful appeals
And heartfelt supplications
Having said that, dear Heidi
Knowing Rob as I do
Don’t feel overlooked
He’d welcome more than two.
Roses are red
wait 'till you see
the pictures he gleans
from AARP
His collection from Cosmo
Is something to view
You simply arent human
If you don't want to screw
But the best of his porn
Without fear of correction
Comes from the centerfold
In Costco Connection
'Doggie' was her other fave
Deep penetration she'd crave
The Lord asked the lusty Lady to dance
The intent was to get in her pants
She glanced at his codpiece
Said "that's an odd crease"
And quickly fell into a trance
Mary was known as contrary
There was a young lad with a limp.
Whose dick was causing his gimp.
It hung quite low
With balls in tow
Made Ferdinand look like a wimp
Alice had a strange bit of plumbing
There was a young lad with a limp.
Whose dick was causing his gimp.
Gloria's clothes were strewn on the floor
Next to them lay her sweating from every pore
Her novena answered
Marjorie Daw rode her seesaw, a lovely wench she was
A balancing act only done for the applause
The seat had a dildo
The other a pillow
Marjorie Daw rode her seesaw, a lovely wench she was
A balancing act only done for the applause
Roses are red
Sweet Juli please excuse
In my self-absorbed state
I feel so bemused
To not acknowledge
Your special day
Well, I dropped the ball
In a thoughtless way
Though belated they be
I wish to extend
Best wishes, happy times
My dear Lush friend
Meter and rhyme are important
Without them the structure is dormant
Otherwise just words
Not fodder for nerds
