n Boston the girls like clam chowder
And we know Boston boys like more the powder
With big chunks of clams
Tastier than jams
A sassy young brat from Moline
Said "let's fuck on the trampoline"
Their hips got to moving
The jolly old mother of three sexy young girls
Taught them to do 'bout anything for pearls
There once was a Grand Master of chess
Who played in a state of undress
Moved his bishop he thought
Then felt his loins get taut
His Queen was a mess, more or less.
The board was as wet as can be
There once was a Grand Master of chess
Who played in a state of undress
Moved his bishop he thought
A skinny young lass knew a trick
Involving some ice and a dick
In twenty minutes its blue
Nice and hard too
But its over when he calls it his joystick
There once was a Grand Master of chess
A skinny young lass knew a trick
Involving some ice and a dick
In twenty minutes its blue
The royal dick most resplendent
Had it's own mind quite independent
With jewels on the shaft
His wife thought he was daft
But the effect was truly transcendent
A shy little lass from Des Moines
The royal dick most resplendent
Had it's own mind quite independent
With jewels on the shaft
The Bishop was quick to disrobe
He lacked the patience of Job
"Birth control is a sin"
Men should just stick it in
"we'll make the most of this probe"
The royal dick most resplendent
The Bishop was quick to disrobe
He lacked the patience of Job
"Birth control is a sin"
Annie lifted her skirt to her waist
Asked if anyone wanted a taste
Line reached 'round the block
Lot's of tongues and some cock
Well basted, tasted and wasted
The Bishop was quick to disrobe
Annie lifted her skirt to her waist
Asked if anyone wanted a taste
Line reached 'round the block
Annie took such delight in those feels
Which led to more tawdry ordeals
The feels became gropes
Became interlopes
And causing a whole bunch of squeals
Annie lifted her skirt to her waist
The Duchess of York played a game
Gave each part of her body a name
Two she called them feet
in the mouth named teeth
And one tit called Aunty, the other called mame
The Duchess of York played a game
Gave each part of her body a name
Two she named feet
With a big toe called Pete
Putting Pete in her girlfriends surname
Her husband, the Duke, was a cad
A young man with an ego quite high
Was so narcissistic he could die
He'd boast and he'd brag
And wave his own flag
While seeking new targets to terrify
The Duchess of York played a game
In the summer he would change his tack
And seek girls to take to the sack
"Open wide," he intoned,
"You're about to be boned."
An instructor of skis from Squaw Valley
Screwed too many guys to tally
He liked the back door
Its less of a chore
The ladies of Perth are well known
For the number of cocks they have blown
They all prefer sucking
The guys hips a bucking
A skill they have long ago honed
An instructor of skis from Squaw Valley
The teacher said "I'll give an 'A'"
To girls I find willing to play
An endless supply
Until Chris Hansen dropped by
Best then to run swiftly away.
The ladies of Perth are well known
The teacher said "I'll give an 'A'"
To girls I find willing to play
An endless supply
The weather outside was so cold
That “Stay in bed,” she was told
There are ways to stay warm
Two alone in the dorm
Make sure the batteries aren't old
there they lie with their hands quite busy
The weather outside was so cold
That “Stay in bed,” she was told
There are ways to stay warm
Swimming was this coed's choice of sport
Some nice teammates with whom to cavort
A coed once studied at Berkeley
Her choice of study philosophy
Odd choice of a major
unfit for a teenager
A lecherous cad from Dundee
Shaved his pubes into a goatee
Hoped it would fool all the gals
They were kissing Frans Hals
A Dutch Master they thought they would see
A coed once studied at Berkeley
The head nun then said to His Grace
Is it sinning to sit on your face?
"Take a seat," he replied
Oh Lord she cried
"My toys this will likely replace."
The head nun then said to His Grace
Is it sinning to sit on your face?
"Take a seat," he replied
And confess while you ride
"I'll absolve you when we get face-to-face."
A lecherous cad from Dundee
The head nun then said to His Grace
Is it sinning to sit on your face?
"Take a seat," he replied
