I rang the doorbell, and Mrs. Bartels quickly came to the door. “Ooh, I don’t remember ordering myself a late-night treat!” she said with a big smile on her face. “Come in.” She took my hand and practically dragged me inside. She was a small woman, but I let her pull me along. She wore dark pajama pants that revealed her cameltoe in the front and her chubby bottom in the back. “You can just go ahead and strip for me,” she...