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Twisted_Skald
Over 90 days ago
Lesbian Cis Female, 49
Ireland

Forum



Not bad for the amount of time I've been here.
That's about 44 people a day.
A lot of it depends on what I'm looking for.
If I just want to watch a hot girl jill herself off, then either is fine.
If I want some BDSM stuff it's mostly utter trash unless you find someone that actually knows what they're doing.
The queer stuff is a very mixed bag. If I see any more women with nails long enough to cause serious internal injury fingering each other , I'm going to burst out laughing hysterically.
So for that I tend to be more interested in who is in front of the camera then whether it's pro or amateur.
Big fake tits, huge nails, and the most ludicrous tongue waggling in the air instantly turn me off, or make me burst out laughing at them.
I think it depends on how much of either we're talking about.
Most of the people I know in long term relationships pretty much admit most of their kids were the result of one or both of their parents having at least one drink to reduce inhibitions.

So a glass or two to loosen up can do wonders especially if you're a restrained kind of personality. Getting wasted and climbing into bed just results in a mess.
If you're so drunk you can't even tell your lover they're doing exactly what you need them to do, or what you don't want them to do, how are you remotely present in that moment?

I've had drunken sex, and I barely remembered it, what little I did remember wasn't very impressive. It's so easy to fall asleep mid performance if you're drunk or high, or to get distracted by something and find they've been fucking your belly button for the last 20 minutes and are loudly wondering why you haven't cum yet.

Maybe it's just my taste in men, but I've had it happen a time or two. Or in one memorable occasion I was sober, he was high and he came before I could get his clothes off.
When your lover has the blissed out face of someone who has cum hard, and their undies are full of their own cum, time to tuck them into bed and go sleep on the couch.
I always found bad sex more frustrating then not having any at all. There's the intense feeling that you could have been doing pretty much anything else and felt better than you did after having bad sex.
What fucking asshat insists I need to use HTTPS to connect to the admin portal to bring a router back online, and then makes the security cert a self signed one that chrome and Edge won't accept?? YOU FUCKING ASSHATS!!!!
Thank Fuck for Firefox.
FUCKING THING!!!!
Struts into the bar, blowing kisses as she gets to the bar.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for the real caffeine fans. Refills with some Italian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Blows a kiss to BB and gives her a comforting pat for being a good...coffee maker.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.

Places a tray of hazelnut and chocolate croissants on the bar.

Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.


Morning my darlings.
I had the worst morning, my router went poof and I needed to reset everything.
Now you'd think the lovely people who insist you have to log in using an encrypted webpage would at least have the sense to make the security cert be actually valid.
Damned Chrome didn't like it and neither did Edge.
Good ole Firefox let me accept the risk, access the admin portal and bring everything back online.

Phew.

After all that I'm about 2 hours behind where I wanted to be, and I'm still trying to get my comp entry and it's side kick complete before the end of the week.
Here's hoping the muse doesn't get shy at the last minute.
Let's kick more power to the scribbling engines and get some content on the page.

Play nice Folks!
Ahem..

"You must be a witch because you enchanted me when you walked in the room."

Yep I got that one from a druid at a conclave.
For me, I've tried both and a woman's beautiful juices for me everytime.
Mens always seemed like their sweat. Heavy, pungent, earthy and musky.
With a mouth feel like cold tapioca or cream cheese from a tube.

Womens always seemed lighter, more like the juice of an oyster.
With a mouth feel like extra virgin olive oil and brine. Peppery, slippery and a hint of the sea.
I could never get enough of it.

Hope that answers the question.
Has the voice of an angel, well a very kinky one but that's fine.
Always have a clean pair of knickers in your bag, you never know when you might need them.
I have. I drove my fathers Mercedes SLK convertible, with the top down, and nothing on but my shoes.
I drove about 30 miles stark naked, pulled over got dressed and drove back. I did give the seat a little dab with a wet wipe to remove any stains.
He never suspected a thing, and put down any discolouration to the natural change in the leather.

Here's to naked driving. Ooh my nipples weren't half hard when I pulled over, the wind made them tingle so.
The ones who shaped my journey in life were all older than I was. I think it should be something we should all be proud to do, show the next generation the skills we learned.
Besides from a purely selfish reason, if we're all getting properly taken care of in the bedroom how many people won't be so quick to explode in road rage, or shout at sales people.
A good moan or two and the world is a much more mellow place.
Quote by Master_Jonathan


I totally agree, TS. I don't know how many of my stories hit me as I lay in bed TRYING to sleep! I usually spend the night running the story through my head "editing" it and replaying it until morning so I won't forget it! Makes for a long night but I have a new story when the sun comes up. Then it's just a matter of typing fast enough to get it all down before I lose it! Which usually comes out something like: NwfN Skdg W4t43r Skdfwoaier! (I can't type fast!)


Goodness Jonathan,
There's no need to be so formal, you can call me Michelle. Everyone else does.

My muse was very surprised to find she's working on the same lines as yours.
I'm starting to keep notes, with set pieces or fragments of dialogue so when I come back to that idea I have some clues where I was going with the initial inspiration.
I'm agog at how productive you are, that muse of yours must be like trying to think in a room full of people all trying to tell you the same story at the same time.
How you can keep it all together long enough to purge it from your mind by committing it all to paper, I don't know.
You are terrifyingly swift to produce material, if you're not a fast typist do you go through many keyboards?
A friend of mine used to work as a reporter, was a hunt and type kinda typist. Used to wear out keyboards from thumping the keys too hard.
Struts into the bar, blowing kisses as she gets to the bar.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for Carl and the caffeine junkies. Refills with some Hawaiian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Places a soft kiss on BB, and polishes her nozzle for being a good...coffee maker.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.


Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.


Good morning my drunken animals, I hope life is going well for you all.
I got my first Covid shot yesterday, and I'm not feeling much different. A faint feeling like I didn't get enough sleep and I'm slightly cold, but nothing as bad as I was expecting.

I hear some utter ass hat decided to be mean to Annie. May the crack of their ass be always itchy when there's someone else in the room to watch them scratch it.
Silly buggers.

Well done to Violet for backing her sister up, and not letting ass hats make her cry.

As for the rest of you lovelies, I have to go on a long boring conference call. Be back soon.
Toodles.
Quote by Meagananne1986


Why are you still wearing clothing? Just curious. If I'm taking in my mouth, I'm taking it my pussy and/or ass. Clothing is an impediment to sexual progress.


Because my dear the men in my life were like bolt action sniper rifles.
One shot and they're done.

Of the 5 men I've had sex with 3 of them didn't bother to undress me.
Course they weren't boyfriends just one off pickups.
Bob for apples, wipe my mouth and go about my day.

Of the 2 that did, they weren't worth the effort to get naked often.
The first one was in and out in under 6 minutes. Didn't even get me fully naked either.
The second one really didn't understand foreplay so that was a challenge.
I really didn't get a kick out of watching him do some kind of press ups on me either.


I had a 1 in 3 chance of cumming with him so I wailed like a pro.
Let him feel like a sexual athlete and took care of myself in the bathroom afterwards.

So if I didn't have to get naked it saved me time.
When you'd rather take a load in the face then get on your back, it's a bad sign.
Yes, I told my bestie I'd been in love with her for years, but I didn't know that's what those feelings were.
I was 19 or 20. I'd barely begun to acknowledge I was attracted to women, wrestling with my sexual identity.
I didn't know if I was bi, bi curious or entirely lesbian.

We were both a little drunk at a friends birthday party. She leaned in to me, I kissed her.
She seemed to enjoy it as she kissed me back, for a few minutes.
Then she gave a sudden jerk, got to her feet, wiped her mouth and went back to the party.
The next time I saw her, she was looking over this guys shoulder as she quite passionately ate the face off him.
She stared into my eyes while she did it too. Just to make damn sure I knew she wasn't into girls.
I left soon after that, in floods of tears. We were never the same after that.

I found out years later that a mutual friend had taken pictures of the party, and in one of them you can see her passionately snogging some guy. In the lower corner was my face, a frozen moment of broken hearted pain. Anyone who saw it could tell that girl had just had her heart crushed, in the most brutal way possible. She pushed the guy off her about 5 minutes after I'd left, she wasn't into him all that much, just wanted to convince herself and me that she wasn't queer.

I still don't know why she didn't just tell me she didn't feel the same way, or let me down gently. It popped up on facebook a few years ago, and anyone tagged in it all mentions how shattered my face looks in that moment. She claims she didn't remember that party, or the half hour conversation we had about our years of friendship and how I was trying to understand my identity.
She's never apologised for it, or given an explanation. She just shrugs it off as us both being after the same guy and she got to kiss him before I did.
Even Blind Pew can see that's a crock of shit.
Such is life. We don't know the cards we're dealt, all we can do is try to play fair, and be kinder to each other.
Yep. I have. Mistress thought I needed reminding of my place, so on my knees to please her. The confused sales assistant who wondered what all the delay was in her coming out saw my shoes sticking out of the curtain. Looked at the angle they were at and wisely decided to pretend she knew nothing. When Mistress was satisfied with my little offering to her pleasure she pulled the curtain open, walked out like nothing unusual had happened. I followed on my knees till she snapped her fingers to let me get back on my feet. She bought the dress, I bought her a smoothie. It was a very pleasant experience. I've done it more than once, but it lost a lot of its mojo when it wasn't at the command of a Mistress. I should try doing it again now I've changed roles and see what it feels like to be on the other end of the experience.

Umm...Does that answer the question you asked?
Quote by noll


Haha, sorry, I thought it was a pretty common abbreviation on social media. But perhaps that's just Twitter, or even just my own bubble on Twitter.


I'm not up to date on social media lingo, I'm a bit old and have to run off to urban dictionary to look this stuff up.
Golly I sound a hundred, but in tech terms I probably am.
Quote by JustAnotherSapphic
So, I decided not to worry about the tropes and just start writing the story but now I've run into another problem.

Things won't heat up between the two characters until the second (and final) chapter, so do I post the first part on the other site or what? I'm lost.


Elyse I wrote an entire piece about Redheads without a single sex scene in it. I tagged it No Sex, and people still caught the passion of my experience.
If it's a one shot, that's fine; if it's a series it's even better. Don't focus so much on the bits that don't work for you.
You can have plenty of scorching fire without a single button being opened.
Listen to your muse, she knows how to make your story crackle in your voice.

Oh and it bears repeating, don't try to write like someone else. It really doesn't work out well, well it hasn't for me.
I write best when I follow my muse, let her guide me through the twisting road of the story she wants to tell.

I believe in you, I believe in your talent, your creativity, and in you as a human being.
Never let Fear stop you from being alive. Mine sometimes does, and when I pass through it I often wonder what I was so scared of. You have a unique voice. Let us hear it. Every piece you've published is another step on your journey, every step makes you more confident in your abilities, more certain in how you want to write.
Be you.

Also as Mamma Rupaul says, "Don't waste your time on the people that don't like you, spend your time on the ones who were already fans. Then you can honestly say you don't care what the bitter people say, you're too busy listening to the cheers of the people who always believed in you. Especially in the moments when you didn't believe in yourself, they still believed in you."

So take your pencil in hand, confront that blank page, let the words fall as they come. You can always tidy up in the editing passes.
Struts into the bar, blowing kisses as she gets to the bar.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for Carl and the caffeine junkies. Refills with some Hawaiian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Places a soft kiss on BB, and polishes her nozzle for being a good...coffee maker.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.


Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.


Good morning my drunken animals, I hope life is going well for you all.

I hear the competition entries are really starting to flow in. I'm still working on mine, so I have lots of time yet before it has to be done.

Lucky sorry to hear that my dear, but I think a lot of us are having our time compressed lately. Life is enjoying filling our time and not always with things we'd choose to do.

Elyse I need squishy hugs my dear, GIMME!!!!

James, You must be roasting in that fur you poor fellow. Draws a complicated pattern in the air and snaps fingers causing a small cloud to appear over your head. In moments it starts to snow heavily.
Polar bears need Love too.

Bill I never quite know what you, Coma and Tose are talking about over there. It always seem to complicated, so very high brow. Course maybe it's because I haven't had enough coffee and the hamster hasn't got on the wheel yet.
Quote by lynnwitt


Is that an African or European swallow?

Ta-dum.

An unladen European swallow
The muse can be an insistent voice in my head at times, so rather then drown her out I put what she whispers in my ear on the page.
There's a tremendous rush when you're in the Zone, fingers flying as you try to keep up with the voice in your head telling you where to go next.
Like you're driving in a rally, listening to your navigator tell you where to go.

The other reason I write out here is frankly I get a lot more eyeballs on my work then I'd ever get without being here.
Sure is doesn't sound like much but when you go from a few dozen readers to over a thousand, it really does change your perception of what you can do.

I did find that as Stephen King said in his book On Writing, "Writers write".
The more I wrote, the more I fed my muse which encouraged me to write even more.

I went from mostly writing material that others used to adlib their own adventures in to having to tell a complete story.
From just bashing stuff out and trusting my performance skills would cover any rough bits, to actually getting books on how to write.
When you turn down a chance to read Pratchett or Wodehouse so you can read a technical book on how to write better dialogue, you know lush had an impact.

I'm a better writer for being here, and I sure hope I keep improving because that muse is getting pushy these days.

TLDR: To keep my muse happy so she keeps telling me stories to write.
back in the day it was always swallow. Easier to clean up and less likely to leave embarrassing stains on clothing.
TIL what TIL stood for, now I feel really silly for not knowing it.
Quote by JamesLlewellyn


Can we hear from another layman?

I'm all in with Michelle and DD on this one. As someone who IS a practicing Anglican (that's Episcopalian for the Americans in the crowd, and Church of England for the English), and has read the entire Bible, cover to cover, there is much to what Michelle says. I believe that's one of the reasons why Jesus said (Matthew 7:5)

"Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye."

It's only been a few days at most. Be patient, sweet lady. The finest harvests take time to mature – and so do relationships.


James, is that the King James version I hear being read aloud?
Call me an old fashioned girl but I love a thou, a thine or a thy.
Almost sounds poetic to me, then again I do like the slightly ancient feel of those words.

As my own teacher used to put it many years ago.
As it harm none, do as thou wilt.


It's a lovely thing to hear ancient words of wisdom spoken aloud with Love , Compassion and Faith.
May the Lord smile on His child and bless you for your piety.
From one humble servant of the Divine to another.
Quote by KimmiBeGood
Thanks, James and Elyse! Glad you're better today, James!

The reactions might be interesting. Before Covid I was talking to what I thought was a nice man. I told him and he directed me to Bible verses about sexual immorality. I am not kidding. Made me cry.

Honestly, kinda dreading trying to go through this process again...


Bible verses on sexual immorality??
This from a book that states two sisters got their dad drunk and carried his kids.
Not a word against it from the prophets either.
They can kiss my gardening boots.

I'd just say you write short stories and let them be.

I used to get bible verses thrown at me too, especially if I walked the street in goth gear.
They got really pissy when I could throw back come of my own.
I may be a Witch but I was a good Anglican and studied my bible as a child.

Seriously though anyone prepared to shame you for being a woman with sexual needs isn't worth spit.

The queer motto Love is Love gets thrown around a lot.
If they're not going to show you acceptance, respect and understanding, drop them.
I wouldn't take that from a stranger let alone someone I wanted in my bed.

You are beautiful, kind , smart and funny. Never let anyone try to take that from you or make you doubt it.

May the Goddess shine Her Light on you Kimmi and guide you to someone worthy of you.
Her Will in all things. Most Blessed Be.