Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
certainly, especially if she likes to tango.
Join the best erotica focused adult social network now
Login
Twisted_Skald
Over 90 days ago
Lesbian Cis Female, 49
Ireland
Forum
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Certainly especially if she wears those heels..gawd.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Aww James you're so cute when you're flustered.
Giggles. I would have seen to BB but well I didn't feel properly dressed. Nicola was here for Goddess sake, can't be making a mess when the Boss Woman is around.
Giggles. I would have seen to BB but well I didn't feel properly dressed. Nicola was here for Goddess sake, can't be making a mess when the Boss Woman is around.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Oh sex in lingerie can be fun. Then again it doesn't stay on for very long, there's always a damn good reason to get naked.
Things feel so much more sensual when you're doing it to bare skin.
Then again nothing makes a woman rip her clothes off faster then the mental image of what she wants you to do to her but can't because there's annoying fabric in the way.
Things feel so much more sensual when you're doing it to bare skin.
Then again nothing makes a woman rip her clothes off faster then the mental image of what she wants you to do to her but can't because there's annoying fabric in the way.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Looks good on my profile now.
Thank you for taking care of it. Much love to the team.
Thank you for taking care of it. Much love to the team.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by fisherWife caught with new boss.
Umm OK, but what's the question?
If this is for a story, give us some rough idea of what kind of direction you're going to go with this.
I mean is it a Cheating story, because it's behind your back.
Is it a Cuck story because you know about it.
A threesome story?
I mean there's not much here apart from a single title and a laughing monkey head.
If it's for reality, I think you need to ask this in the relationships forum.
I don't think this is the best place to ask this.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Oh I most certainly would, especially if she's wearing THAT dress.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Goodness what a day. Rumps is taking a break, and the Boss Woman came to visit.
Damn good thing I wore undies today, wouldn't to be unladylike in that company.
Bill you are a talent beyond words, and an inspiration to all of us to never give in. By all means take a break, just don't be cruel to yourself.
Don't make me get the girls (Kimmi, Emma, Gracie, and Curious Annie) together and come round to whip some sense into you.
Oh wait, maybe you do want us to do that. Ahem, never mind me.
Seriously though, take a rest, enjoy your g-g-grand child. Remember you're loved not only here, but by your family too. There are more important things in this life then pretty baubles, shiny badges and ribbons. You're a fabulous, wonderful, human being. We love you all madly here.
Nicola Gives a respectful curtsy before speaking to such a figure. Do thank the Masked Judges for their service it can't have been easy to sort this lot.
To the rest of you animals. I'm letting the muse put words on a page for a friend of mine. I'm keeping if filthy, lewd and fun as all heck.
play nice now.
Damn good thing I wore undies today, wouldn't to be unladylike in that company.
Bill you are a talent beyond words, and an inspiration to all of us to never give in. By all means take a break, just don't be cruel to yourself.
Don't make me get the girls (Kimmi, Emma, Gracie, and Curious Annie) together and come round to whip some sense into you.
Oh wait, maybe you do want us to do that. Ahem, never mind me.
Seriously though, take a rest, enjoy your g-g-grand child. Remember you're loved not only here, but by your family too. There are more important things in this life then pretty baubles, shiny badges and ribbons. You're a fabulous, wonderful, human being. We love you all madly here.
Nicola Gives a respectful curtsy before speaking to such a figure. Do thank the Masked Judges for their service it can't have been easy to sort this lot.
To the rest of you animals. I'm letting the muse put words on a page for a friend of mine. I'm keeping if filthy, lewd and fun as all heck.
play nice now.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Now I may be as thick as a whale omelette but it looks like my comp badge for Fools is broken.
Is it just me?
Is it just me?
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by KimmiBeGood
Hi Rumpies!
Kimmi just got poked by a masked man for the second time.
Is it weird I had a naughty micro writing itself in my head during my few minutes alone with him. He had smouldering eyes ...
A masked man you say....
Hides my poking stick in my boot.
Nope nothing to see here.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Skips into the bar, a happy song on her lips. Giving everyone a cheery wave and blowing kisses.
Hair bouncing as her boots skip across the floor, eyes sparkling with mischief.
Hello my lovelies.
Feeling like Bad Ass Bitch today, I had a rough evening yesterday but I managed to sort it all out.
Amazing what some good hot playtime will do to fix a Dommes mood.
So I see the shiny new badges are out.
huffs and polishes the proud new Competitor badge on her jacket.
That's three for three so I am stomping it today. Feeling all my power and sharing the love.
James keep rocking the world, and celebrate your badges babe. They don't come on trees, and neither do I. Well maybe when in a tree, but that's a story for another day.
Jack is that you propping up the bar with the other bar flies. So lovely to have you with us.
Elyse I need some big squishy hugs, some come here and gimme some. I'm a greedy woman and I can never have too many of them.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
What kind of fucktard marries a geek, sees her get a big box delivery of geeky goodness , then gets pissy when the geek wants to play with her new toys.
Oh Goddess grant me patience.
Then when I miss one fucking call to pick her up a 20 minute walk away, I'm a fucking selfish bitch.
Oh Goddess grant me patience.
Then getting fucking childish throwing old arguments in my face.
Fuck you frigid bitch, fuck off and leave me alone.
Luna give me Strength.
Storms off and kicks something in the garden.
Oh Goddess grant me patience.
Then when I miss one fucking call to pick her up a 20 minute walk away, I'm a fucking selfish bitch.
Oh Goddess grant me patience.
Then getting fucking childish throwing old arguments in my face.
Fuck you frigid bitch, fuck off and leave me alone.
Luna give me Strength.
Storms off and kicks something in the garden.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by Lucky_lildragonfly
Hello everyone!
I’m so happy, I have the best Sir and Miss...???????????
You my dear certainly deserve them and they absolutely adore you.
I can tell, trust a Witch.
Speaking of Witches, thank you for the OWLS!!!!!!
I'm getting gooey and silly..and shy..looking at them..
SQUEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by JustAnotherSapphic
...wouldn't that be nice. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how much that will help cause I had one on Sunday and I'm not sure how likely having another would be.
Also this isn't me wanting to be snuggled up skin to skin with her.
Yes darling but I never tire of dreaming about Natalie and the wicked things she wants me to do with her.
Oooh swiffers..
Ahem..Sorry where was I.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by KimmiBeGood
Morning Rumpies!
Michelle, you are good for my ego ... you and your druids ever been to Kentucky?
And Jack! small world!!! Love finding a fellow UK fan here!!!
Last but not least ... HUGE praise for all brave enough to enter the Foolish comp. Is anyone surprised the penises took the podium with this theme?Rumps Bar was well represented! You ALL added to the fun of the comp and I loved sitting back and reading you all!!!
We haven;t been Stateside yet, but we really must.
If we do I am so visiting you, though I can't promise not to glomp you.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Bounces into the bar,waving her hands in the air and blowing kisses all round the room as she gets to the bar.
Instead of sliding behind it as normal, she dances back a few steps and runs towards the bar. Placing her hands on the bartop, vaulting up and over it.
Landing on the other side with a small cloud of dust, and the heavy thud of her boots.
Snaps her heels together, and raises her arms over her head like a gymnast on the vault. Bowing to the judges.
With practised fingers starts to get the bar ready.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for Carl and the caffeine junkies. Refills with some Hawaiian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Places a soft kiss on BB, and polishes her nozzle affectionately.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.
The teas and hot chocolate are all nicely laid out.
Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.
Good morning my drunken animals, I hope life is going well for you all.
I see James has given us the run down of what you've been doing in the last month. It's very easy to focus on one tale at a time and forget the huge amount of original material,
that gets created every month by writers who call Rumps home. Each and every one of you should be very proud of yourselves. You've brought joy, tears, laughter, and some very soggy undies to us breathless readers.
Thank you one and all for what you give us greedy readers every month.
Linda, I've made a special batch of goodies for Gracie and Lucky so I figured you deserve one too.
I won't tell the fireman if you have more than one, it's just our little secret. Speaking of which, do give him a kiss on the cheek and a squishy hug from us all. He makes the stars shine in your eyes, for that alone he's a Blessing.
Angel, lovely to have a proper Angel in here among us depraved souls. A pleasure to meet you and to talk with you, you're a remarkable woman.
Don't sell yourself short. I prefer to sell myself as super limited edition collectable merch.
There's only one of you and you're priceless, let the jealous haters grind their teeth babe. Stomp that day under your boots and smile too. It really makes the haters grumble when you do that.
Bill, keep being the inspiration to me and so many of us. Keep writing, keep dancing, keep being your handsome self. You are more beloved then you can imagine. Coma and Tose must be very busy keeping back the tides of groupies looking to see the Legendary Rumps.
Terrance, you've been a good spider so I brought some crickets. Yes I'm not just a hateful bitch, but be a good spider and DON'T chase Angel.
I know she's lovely, but you will make her very scared and unhappy. Unhappy ladies have heels and might whack you with them a few times.
Yes I'd curl into a ball too, but you're a nice spider. So go back to the nut warmer and dream of ..I dunno other spiders...
Kimmi my dear, I know it's painful and you may not want to do it. When it's done, you're going to be one bad ass bitch and ready to werk this room like a pro.
Course maybe I'm just a kinky bitch but I found your pink face awfully alluring. Down Mish, down. No chasing Kimmi, she has cuffs...ooooh cuffs.
Now where was I?
Elyse, big squishy hugs to you my dear. Sending positively filthy dreams about Lady Jane to you, so you can have a glorious nights sleep.
We should all dream of our fantasy lover at least once right.
Well my darlings, I've finally got the workstation online and running smoothly.
The damn touchpad is under the heel of my right hand and does sometimes make my text bounce all over the place.
Still nothing I can't learn how to manage.
I'm taking a huge mug of hot chocolate and writing a saucy tale.
A friend of mine asked me to put one of their fantasies on the page and I'm going to see if I can make it a brain melting one.
Hopefully it will make her very happy with the results too.
If this is your first time here or your thousandth, please be extra kind to each other. Play nicely, make lots of noise and mess.
The dryads like cleaning up, so don't be tidy down here.
Big squishy hugs, warm kisses and encouraging applause to you all.
Keep showing that page who is the boss, keep spinning tales out of thin air, keep showing us all your creativity and your talent.
BUT most of all keep having far too much fun.
Keep it Witchy!
Instead of sliding behind it as normal, she dances back a few steps and runs towards the bar. Placing her hands on the bartop, vaulting up and over it.
Landing on the other side with a small cloud of dust, and the heavy thud of her boots.
Snaps her heels together, and raises her arms over her head like a gymnast on the vault. Bowing to the judges.
With practised fingers starts to get the bar ready.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for Carl and the caffeine junkies. Refills with some Hawaiian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Places a soft kiss on BB, and polishes her nozzle affectionately.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.
The teas and hot chocolate are all nicely laid out.
Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.
Good morning my drunken animals, I hope life is going well for you all.
I see James has given us the run down of what you've been doing in the last month. It's very easy to focus on one tale at a time and forget the huge amount of original material,
that gets created every month by writers who call Rumps home. Each and every one of you should be very proud of yourselves. You've brought joy, tears, laughter, and some very soggy undies to us breathless readers.
Thank you one and all for what you give us greedy readers every month.
Linda, I've made a special batch of goodies for Gracie and Lucky so I figured you deserve one too.
I won't tell the fireman if you have more than one, it's just our little secret. Speaking of which, do give him a kiss on the cheek and a squishy hug from us all. He makes the stars shine in your eyes, for that alone he's a Blessing.
Angel, lovely to have a proper Angel in here among us depraved souls. A pleasure to meet you and to talk with you, you're a remarkable woman.
Don't sell yourself short. I prefer to sell myself as super limited edition collectable merch.
There's only one of you and you're priceless, let the jealous haters grind their teeth babe. Stomp that day under your boots and smile too. It really makes the haters grumble when you do that.
Bill, keep being the inspiration to me and so many of us. Keep writing, keep dancing, keep being your handsome self. You are more beloved then you can imagine. Coma and Tose must be very busy keeping back the tides of groupies looking to see the Legendary Rumps.
Terrance, you've been a good spider so I brought some crickets. Yes I'm not just a hateful bitch, but be a good spider and DON'T chase Angel.
I know she's lovely, but you will make her very scared and unhappy. Unhappy ladies have heels and might whack you with them a few times.
Yes I'd curl into a ball too, but you're a nice spider. So go back to the nut warmer and dream of ..I dunno other spiders...
Kimmi my dear, I know it's painful and you may not want to do it. When it's done, you're going to be one bad ass bitch and ready to werk this room like a pro.
Course maybe I'm just a kinky bitch but I found your pink face awfully alluring. Down Mish, down. No chasing Kimmi, she has cuffs...ooooh cuffs.
Now where was I?
Elyse, big squishy hugs to you my dear. Sending positively filthy dreams about Lady Jane to you, so you can have a glorious nights sleep.
We should all dream of our fantasy lover at least once right.
Well my darlings, I've finally got the workstation online and running smoothly.
The damn touchpad is under the heel of my right hand and does sometimes make my text bounce all over the place.
Still nothing I can't learn how to manage.
I'm taking a huge mug of hot chocolate and writing a saucy tale.
A friend of mine asked me to put one of their fantasies on the page and I'm going to see if I can make it a brain melting one.
Hopefully it will make her very happy with the results too.
If this is your first time here or your thousandth, please be extra kind to each other. Play nicely, make lots of noise and mess.
The dryads like cleaning up, so don't be tidy down here.
Big squishy hugs, warm kisses and encouraging applause to you all.
Keep showing that page who is the boss, keep spinning tales out of thin air, keep showing us all your creativity and your talent.
BUT most of all keep having far too much fun.
Keep it Witchy!
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by JamesLlewellyn
Now, Lucky, you tried to get it on with me once, you swung and you missed, so DON'T be trying to sneak in the back door, OK? But you're more than welcome to have a…chaste…hug. You are Lucky that I like you!
And good morning, Madam Curvy! Always delightful to see a lady around here! Thanks for seeing to BB. I'm still a little nervous about playing with her.
Well, I have an exciting day ahead of me. Those lovely people from the tax authorities (Canada Revenue Agency – and IRS wannabe) have mis-allocated money Lady Jay and I have paid them, and it's going to cause problems later, so I have to speak slowly to them, using short words, and easy ideas so they understand.
Patience is NOT my strong suit, but it's gotta be today. Wish me luck!
Slips an owl feather into your lapel.
Never hurts to have a Goddess of Justice on your side.
Will start chanting to ensure Her favour in your difficult battle.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by Lucky_lildragonfly
Hi everybody, I hope all is well with everyone.
I scribbled a new story https://www.lushstories.com/stories/bisexual/-beyond-her-wildest-dreams-.aspx
I hope you all like it. Please comment if you do.
I’ll take a lemonade with something of a kick to it. Please and ty Rump.
Back to my scribbling, need to work on a story of a cheating husband.....looks at James and giggles.???
Good heavens you're a brave woman to have a cheating polar bear, tricky thing to sell out here.
I have faith in your talents to pull it off.
Speaking of your own tales , very well done licky..I mean Lucky.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by curvygalore
Good morning, everyone! How nice to see some new faces popping in here along with the irregular regulars!
BB has been de-sludged (saved for Carl) rinsed and refilled and there is a fresh pot of tea on the bar for Scott and any other tea drinkers.
The brownies are plated and the mugs are in the sink.
Tea, coffee, fine lickers, anyone?
Morning Curvy,
Let me take care of the washing up, I can them back on the rack in no time.
Lovely to see you with us again, you have been missed.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by kistinspencil
Yes, maybe, of course not. Thank you for asking. You made my morning special.
Produces a notebook and takes very detailed notes of that conversation.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Oh it's a wonderful thing when it's done right and even better when you know you shouldn't.
Xoxo
Xoxo
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by JustAnotherSapphic
Not me still awake and unable to stop thinking about the dream I had about Jane yesterday, I swear.
Why can't I have a totally happy dream about her for once?
Elyse dear , because temptation is the soul of desire.
You so want to be with her, to fold into her arms, to be in her bed.
Nothing smutty. Just the cuddles, the warmth of her body against you.
If you just curl up in your arms you'd lose some of that frisson that makes it all so appealing.
So you have to deny yourself that perfect moment so you have another excuse to try again.
To keep striving for that perfect moment, in her arms, where you flow into her spirit like a river to the sea.
At least that's just how I see it.
I've been trying to fuck Natalie Portman for years, bitch still teases my dreams.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Struts into the bar, blowing kisses as she gets to the bar.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for the real caffeine fans. Refills with some Italian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Blows a kiss to BB and gives her a comforting pat for being a good...coffee maker.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.
Places a tray of hazelnut and chocolate croissants on the bar.
Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.
Good morning my hung over lovelies.
Its cloudy and dry at the moment so I'm planning to hit the beach and walk a few miles.
Big squishy hugs to you all.
Oh Angel if you see Another Sapphic, that's Elyse and they love a big squishy hug so give them one.
Fnar that sounded much dirtier then I intended.
Right dont nudge Sprites throne or you might get turned into a frog, just saying.
Bill my favourite boss and wonderful soul. Thank you for giving all of us strays a place to call home.
Muah. You're lovely.
Empties Big Bertha, keeping the sludge for the real caffeine fans. Refills with some Italian roast beans, and lots of mountain fresh water.
Blows a kiss to BB and gives her a comforting pat for being a good...coffee maker.
Cleans out the big kettle and refills it, setting it to boil.
Places a tray of hazelnut and chocolate croissants on the bar.
Switches the sign from The Witch is OUT to IN.
Wiggles fingers and summons a dryad to get the washing up done, while a second whirls round the room driving all the rubbish into a pile, before feeding it to an earth elemental.
Good morning my hung over lovelies.
Its cloudy and dry at the moment so I'm planning to hit the beach and walk a few miles.
Big squishy hugs to you all.
Oh Angel if you see Another Sapphic, that's Elyse and they love a big squishy hug so give them one.
Fnar that sounded much dirtier then I intended.
Right dont nudge Sprites throne or you might get turned into a frog, just saying.
Bill my favourite boss and wonderful soul. Thank you for giving all of us strays a place to call home.
Muah. You're lovely.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by AngelWorthy
G'Day RumpleForeskin & Friends. From the Land Down Under, that many call OZ.
I am but a newbie to not only these forums, but this site. I have been a silent stalker in this particular thread for a few months now & have enjoyed the closeness that many of you share here. I am still getting my head around some of the lingo shared between your great selves. I am not a writer, but an avid reader. I have commented on a couple of stories that I have read. But I think I need to comment on many more as I do enjoy reading. Even if just to encourage more stories to be written by you great Authors.
As I said, I am but a newbie. I do mainly hang out in the chatrooms, especially the softcore room, where I met Daddy_D (DD) & Gracieanne (Gracie). Two great friends of mine, as I am sure they are your great friends too. Having notice DD comment in this thread (yes, I am a bit of a stalker, but only in a good way) I started reading the comments & a thought popped into my mind. That thought became a goal. I would make my 100th comment in the forums an introduction of myself here in the Awesome Honky Tonk & Cyber Bar. So here I am. My 100th comment in the forums.
Welcome my dear to the bar that never closes , is always happy to see arrivals and welcomes new arrivals like old friends.
So your a pal of DD and Gracie, they're tops in my book. Lovely to have a sunny smiling Aussie with us today.
I'm Michelle, deputy bartender who looks after Big Bertha and sometimes gets the kitchen running.
Call me Michelle if you want a drink, Miss if you need a spanking and Skald if you need a Witch.
Speaking of which its past time I got BB ready to go. Be right back.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by DanielleX
*Pulls up a bar stool*
Firstly well done on Leicester City winning the FA cup for the first time in their history?
I think this calls for a cocktail - Martini, Gordon's dry gin, a dash of vodka and a squeeze of lime. I name this cocktail a Leicester Titty.
D x
Starts pulling bottles off the shelf, pouring them into a shaker. Putting a fistful of ice in the shaker.
Shakes the mixture with a steady rhythm and pours in through a sieve into a chilled glass.
Puts a coaster on the bar and places the glass on top.
There ya go Danielle. Lovely to have you with us.
Congrats to Leicester on winning the FA cup.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by kistinspencil
Now, now, Michelle. Miss Pixel is the sweetest of lesbian pussies. Granted, she gives very short shrift to large furry mammals who don't clean up after themselves, but who doesn't? I know of very few women she wouldn't happily share some intense lap time with. She is particularly fond of Verity's stories. She even offered to share the big blue-belly lizard she caught this morning to celebrate her Number One spotting. This is quite the honor and not to be taken lightly. There will be saucer milk and salmon treats after, of course.
Yes Kis, sorry about that.
I got a little distracted when I was visiting as Verity sent me a picture of her ankles and I clean forgot to do the washing up.
Miss Pixel was very tolerant when I refilled her litter tray with the deluxe litter.
Hoo that cat has a fierce look when displeased.
I left some fabulous Belgian chocs in the fridge for you too and some special feline treats.
Chatterbox Blonde- Rumps Mystical Bartender
Quote by verity100
Oh yes James. I often forget that you are indeed a married man. Quite understandable though, how you found a lady to put up with you and your (special) box of tricks is beyond me. Surely the Flunitrazepam Rohypnol must have worn off by now. Wait, this G&T tastes a bit funny..........
Ahem that's tree sap, sloppy dryads leaving things behind again.
If I wanted you compliant my dear Verity, I'd wear my Witch cloak and drop it on the floor.
Amazing how effective it is at making people follow me with a glassy eyed stare.
Must be the fabric softener I use. Muah