Hello Olivia,

I've a female friend in her mid 40s. She and I met on AFF in 2006, enjoyed one another carnally for a few months...until one lazy Sunday afternoon while making pillow talk, I confessed to her "I can see why you'd have men falling head over heels for you."

It wasn't an admission that I was doing so, more just a complimentary comment after several weeks of casually dating and mating. I found out some months later that she felt I was professing more than a mere sexual interest in her and broke off future dates later that evening when she returned to her residence.

About eight months later, one January evening...out of the blue, she struck up a chat session with me...allegedly to ask me for some counsel and advice from a man's point of view - about another man and how she felt she was being mistreated.

This woman is one of several female friends in my life who like to bounce their concerns off of me, seemingly, nearly every month. I'm not complaining - I live vicariously through a few of these women friends of mine and enjoy hearing about their successes and their pratfalls, too.

But I am amazed that all of these women are in their late 30s to late 40s...and most all of them don't seem to pick up signals from us men. Are we guys still so baffling to women who have been dating for 20 or more years? I suppose there is still a great deal of game playing out there. I know that when I sense I'm being played, I simply initiate a straightforward talk with the woman who I believe is gaming me. More often than not, it's a misunderstanding on my part and after talking awhile...my perception is altered to the point where I see that I missed something(s) she said in the past weeks or months.

Why are we men and women, still so puzzling to each other...in our 30s, 40s and 50s? I suppose we are the reason for advice guidance counselors, to begin with?

The most recent conversation I enjoyed with my friend concerned the new guy she's been seeing the last few weeks. She's a marriage minded girl. He's recently left a nine year long relationship (within the last year), who is rather succe$$ful with multiple homes, no kids in his house, no ex wives raking alimony...and in his early 50s...I believe he's feeling footloose and fancy free.

Based on some of the things she's told me that he's told her...as well as the lack of any 'real dates' he treats her to...usually it's an Applebee's dinner and then back to her house for some sex, he spends the night and is gone by 8am the next day.

"I think he's playing ya babe. He's told you he's seeing at least three other women locally and yet another when he drives 240 miles to his lake house."

"What do you think I should do?"

"I think you should do whatever you want to do. Date him, have sex (use protection) go to his lake house if he invites you...go to ballgames ... if he invites you. Don't get hung up on him...and continue to cast your net in the river and date other men if you are asked and you find them attractive. I think this man is enjoying life and you - and other women. No harm, no foul. He's just in a different frame of mind, than you."

I give this advice for free (with hopes of possible oral favors returned in a few years)...so far, Olivia...I've not been repaid by anyone https://static.lushstories.com/emoticons/lush/forum/evil6.gif

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