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marcosurbina
Over 90 days ago
Male, 75
Mexico
Forum
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Knock - knock. Oh, it must be Rocco
Bricklayers filling cracks
Bricklayers filling cracks
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Sexuality and Child Development
Early Childhood (2-5)
In many ways, the development of sexuality during the years 2 to 5 is a continuation of the key developmental processes that began in infancy. For example, by around age 3, children should have a clear sense of whether they are a boy or a girl and have sense of autonomy and confidence in themselves rather than overriding sense of guilt and shame. With respect to gender, most children by the age 3 can identify people in photographs or on television and dolls as male or female and can tell an adult whether they are a boy or a girl.
By age 2, children will have become quite familiar with their own bodies. Now, as part of the learning process, children will start to become very interested and curious about the bodies of others, both adults and children. Recognition that opposite sex children, older children, and adults have bodies different from their own feeds this curiousity. Because the genital areas are usually covered by clothing, interest in these areas may be heightened. For example, a child will likely be curious about a mother's breasts and a father's penis and why adults have pubic hair but children don't. Children will engage in "peeking" games during visits to the toilet. These can be opportunities for parents to continue teaching accurate names for the genitals as many children at this age will have developed euphemisms for the genitals. These interactions with parents can also provide an opportunity introduce the concept of privacy. Before age 5, children need to learn that nudity and sexuality are not engaged in publicly.
Curious kid
Early Childhood (2-5)
In many ways, the development of sexuality during the years 2 to 5 is a continuation of the key developmental processes that began in infancy. For example, by around age 3, children should have a clear sense of whether they are a boy or a girl and have sense of autonomy and confidence in themselves rather than overriding sense of guilt and shame. With respect to gender, most children by the age 3 can identify people in photographs or on television and dolls as male or female and can tell an adult whether they are a boy or a girl.
By age 2, children will have become quite familiar with their own bodies. Now, as part of the learning process, children will start to become very interested and curious about the bodies of others, both adults and children. Recognition that opposite sex children, older children, and adults have bodies different from their own feeds this curiousity. Because the genital areas are usually covered by clothing, interest in these areas may be heightened. For example, a child will likely be curious about a mother's breasts and a father's penis and why adults have pubic hair but children don't. Children will engage in "peeking" games during visits to the toilet. These can be opportunities for parents to continue teaching accurate names for the genitals as many children at this age will have developed euphemisms for the genitals. These interactions with parents can also provide an opportunity introduce the concept of privacy. Before age 5, children need to learn that nudity and sexuality are not engaged in publicly.
Curious kid
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Well, this pilot was not blind, he was... Not exactly something we would laught at.
United Airlines pilot arrested on suspicion of being drunk
An airline pilot was arrested in the cockpit of his plane on suspicion of being drunk before take-off.
By Chris Irvine
Published: 6:51AM BST 20 Oct 2008
A United Airlines statement said their alcohol policy was among the strictest in the industry Photo: Reuters The 44-year-old man was led off the plane by police following a breath test at Heathrow Airport's Terminal 1 on Sunday morning.
The Boeing 777 United Airlines flight had been scheduled to fly to San Francisco.
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Microlight crash pilot arrested on suspicion of flying while over alcohol limitIt is thought the police moved after being tipped off by a member of the airport's ground staff, who suspected the pilot had been drinking before the 5,300-mile flight.
A Metropolitan police spokeswoman said: "At approximately 9am on Sunday, officers attended an aircraft at Heathrow Terminal One and arrested a 44-year-old man.
"The man arrested is bailed to return to Heathrow police station on January 16 pending further enquiries."
A United Airlines statement said: "United's alcohol policy is among the strictest in the industry and we have no tolerance for abuse or violation of this well-established policy.
"Safety is our No1 priority and the pilot has been removed from service while we are co-operating with authorities and conducting a full investigation."
One passenger told The Sun: "We couldn't believe what we were seeing. The pilot was marched off the aircraft.
"A couple of police officers stormed onto the plane as we were all sitting down and went straight for the cockpit.
"We didn't have a clue what was happening and we were kept waiting on the plane for hours."
The passenger added: "It is horrifying to think we were apparently so close to being flown thousands of miles by somebody who could have been drinking.
"It was a horrible start to our trip but if it wasn't for the person who called the cops, our dream holiday could have become a nightmare.
The legal limit for pilots is nine micrograms of alcohol in 100 millilitres of breath - more than three times stricter than the drink-drive limit which is 35 micrograms.
The blind woman at present bikebum1975's joke above
United Airlines pilot arrested on suspicion of being drunk
An airline pilot was arrested in the cockpit of his plane on suspicion of being drunk before take-off.
By Chris Irvine
Published: 6:51AM BST 20 Oct 2008
A United Airlines statement said their alcohol policy was among the strictest in the industry Photo: Reuters The 44-year-old man was led off the plane by police following a breath test at Heathrow Airport's Terminal 1 on Sunday morning.
The Boeing 777 United Airlines flight had been scheduled to fly to San Francisco.
Related Articles
United Airlines pilot arrested on suspicion of being drunk
Naomi Campbell bailed after 'spitting' arrest
Pilot arrested at Heathrow for `being over drink limit'
Naomi Campbell banned by British Airways
Microlight crash pilot arrested on suspicion of flying while over alcohol limitIt is thought the police moved after being tipped off by a member of the airport's ground staff, who suspected the pilot had been drinking before the 5,300-mile flight.
A Metropolitan police spokeswoman said: "At approximately 9am on Sunday, officers attended an aircraft at Heathrow Terminal One and arrested a 44-year-old man.
"The man arrested is bailed to return to Heathrow police station on January 16 pending further enquiries."
A United Airlines statement said: "United's alcohol policy is among the strictest in the industry and we have no tolerance for abuse or violation of this well-established policy.
"Safety is our No1 priority and the pilot has been removed from service while we are co-operating with authorities and conducting a full investigation."
One passenger told The Sun: "We couldn't believe what we were seeing. The pilot was marched off the aircraft.
"A couple of police officers stormed onto the plane as we were all sitting down and went straight for the cockpit.
"We didn't have a clue what was happening and we were kept waiting on the plane for hours."
The passenger added: "It is horrifying to think we were apparently so close to being flown thousands of miles by somebody who could have been drinking.
"It was a horrible start to our trip but if it wasn't for the person who called the cops, our dream holiday could have become a nightmare.
The legal limit for pilots is nine micrograms of alcohol in 100 millilitres of breath - more than three times stricter than the drink-drive limit which is 35 micrograms.
The blind woman at present bikebum1975's joke above
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English is a West Germanic language that originated in Anglo-Saxon England. As a result of the military, economic, scientific, political, and cultural influence of the British Empire during the 18th, 19th, and early 20th centuries and of the United States since the mid 20th century It has become the lingua franca in many parts of the world. It is used extensively as a second language and as an official language in Commonwealth countries and many international organizations.
Historically, English originated from several dialects, now collectively termed Old English, which were brought to Great Britain by Anglo-Saxon settlers beginning in the 5th century. The language was heavily influenced by the Old Norse language of Viking invaders. After the Norman conquest, Old English developed into Middle English, borrowing heavily from the Norman (Anglo-French) vocabulary and spelling conventions. Modern English developed from there notably with the Great Vowel Shift that began in 15th-century England, and continues to adopt foreign words from a variety of languages, as well as coining new words. A significant number of English words, especially technical words, have been constructed based on roots from Latin and ancient Greek.
Historically, English originated from several dialects, now collectively termed Old English, which were brought to Great Britain by Anglo-Saxon settlers beginning in the 5th century. The language was heavily influenced by the Old Norse language of Viking invaders. After the Norman conquest, Old English developed into Middle English, borrowing heavily from the Norman (Anglo-French) vocabulary and spelling conventions. Modern English developed from there notably with the Great Vowel Shift that began in 15th-century England, and continues to adopt foreign words from a variety of languages, as well as coining new words. A significant number of English words, especially technical words, have been constructed based on roots from Latin and ancient Greek.
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Good memories when seeing this sign, Rocco. I was a kid and lived in a shack in Caracas outskirts, back in 1959. Well, my mom -she passed away- later built brick walls which also collapsed by floods after heavy rain. But the point here is that English language was too strange in my case and I didn't even know if languages existed ever. I was surrounded by cans containing powder milk, but the text was in English: DAIRY QUEEN, plus the photo of a beautiful girl in a farm in her classical outfit. I now know the meaning of Dairy Queen in Spanish, ha, ha!!
Dairy Queen and pic of her ass
Dairy Queen and pic of her ass
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A teenage boy and his steady girlfriend were making out in his parked car, when the boy got really turned on, and said, "Please darlin', I can't take it anymore, I have to get some relief."
His girl replies, "You know I am saving myself until we get married!"
He continues to plead and begs her, "What if I just put the head in for a while, just let me marinate it a little?"
Finally getting a bit steamed up herself, she reluctantly agrees, but says, only if it's the head. So he anxiously unzips and fumbling, puts the head of his manhood into the softness of her secret treasure and that's all he does, well for about 30 seconds anyway, but in the heat of passion, he gets carried away and before you know it he's put it in entirely and is pumping away with deep thrusts for all he's worth.
After a few minutes his lady love moans and thrilling to the mounting pleasure and a new awareness, haltingly gasps "I know we have this deal, that you are only putting the head in, but... this feels so damn good, go ahead and give it all to me!"
Jolted to his senses, stopping in mid thrust, but thinking quickly our hero responds, "Nope, a deals a deal."
No need to know what killed Marcos
His girl replies, "You know I am saving myself until we get married!"
He continues to plead and begs her, "What if I just put the head in for a while, just let me marinate it a little?"
Finally getting a bit steamed up herself, she reluctantly agrees, but says, only if it's the head. So he anxiously unzips and fumbling, puts the head of his manhood into the softness of her secret treasure and that's all he does, well for about 30 seconds anyway, but in the heat of passion, he gets carried away and before you know it he's put it in entirely and is pumping away with deep thrusts for all he's worth.
After a few minutes his lady love moans and thrilling to the mounting pleasure and a new awareness, haltingly gasps "I know we have this deal, that you are only putting the head in, but... this feels so damn good, go ahead and give it all to me!"
Jolted to his senses, stopping in mid thrust, but thinking quickly our hero responds, "Nope, a deals a deal."
No need to know what killed Marcos
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Q. How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank?
A. Ring them up and say you can't come.
%%%%%%%%%
• A man walks into a sperm bank and declares I'm of royal blood and an I.Q. of 165, I'd like to make a donation. The nurse gives him a sealed cup and directs him to a private room. 20 minutes later the man hasn't come out, the nurse knocks on the door. "Is there a problem?"
"I'm so embarrassed, I used my right hand. I used my left hand. I poured cold water on it and hot water on it. Could you help me?
The nurse replied "I don't usually do this but you are kinda cute..."
She gets on her knees and begins to blow him.
"I really appreciate this, but I need help getting the cap off the jar!"
A. Ring them up and say you can't come.
%%%%%%%%%
• A man walks into a sperm bank and declares I'm of royal blood and an I.Q. of 165, I'd like to make a donation. The nurse gives him a sealed cup and directs him to a private room. 20 minutes later the man hasn't come out, the nurse knocks on the door. "Is there a problem?"
"I'm so embarrassed, I used my right hand. I used my left hand. I poured cold water on it and hot water on it. Could you help me?
The nurse replied "I don't usually do this but you are kinda cute..."
She gets on her knees and begins to blow him.
"I really appreciate this, but I need help getting the cap off the jar!"
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What do you do for a living? I’m a cashier at a sperm bank in China.
I’ve Heard sperm donors in the United States, who attend a sperm bank for such duties, and are handed in a small bottle plus porn magazines at the reception desk. They are directed to a private or clandestine room afterwards so donors themselves work on their sperm extraction by getting aroused and stimulated at seeing the photos.
This stir up a question, are Chinese much more deloped within this area than in America? See pictures below. You’ve gotta show love for your job indeed!!
A photo a donor candidate would probably see
In Latin America
I’ve Heard sperm donors in the United States, who attend a sperm bank for such duties, and are handed in a small bottle plus porn magazines at the reception desk. They are directed to a private or clandestine room afterwards so donors themselves work on their sperm extraction by getting aroused and stimulated at seeing the photos.
This stir up a question, are Chinese much more deloped within this area than in America? See pictures below. You’ve gotta show love for your job indeed!!
A photo a donor candidate would probably see
In Latin America
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Well, why did you came up with this result, XXXnechoXXX
Positive numbers are any numbers greater than zero, for example: 1, 2.9, 3.14159, 40000, and 0.0005. For each positive number, there is a negative number that is its opposite. We write the opposite of a positive number with a negative or minus sign in front of the number, and call these numbers negative numbers. The opposites of the numbers in the list above would be: -1, -2.9, -3.14159, -40000, and -0.0005. Negative numbers are less than zero.
We do not consider zero to be a positive or negative number. The sign of a number refers to whether the number is positive or negative, for example, the sign of -3.2 is negative, and the sign of 442 is positive.
The following fractions are all equal:
(-1)/3, 1/(-3), -(1/3) and - 1/3.
The following mixed numbers are all equal:
-1 1/6, -(1 1/6), (-7)/6, 7/(-6), and - 7/6.
The Number Line
The number line is a line labeled with positive and negative numbers in increasing order from left to right, that extends in both directions, like the one drawn on the blackboard for the kids above. The number line shown below is just a small piece of the number line from -4 to 4.
Positive numbers are any numbers greater than zero, for example: 1, 2.9, 3.14159, 40000, and 0.0005. For each positive number, there is a negative number that is its opposite. We write the opposite of a positive number with a negative or minus sign in front of the number, and call these numbers negative numbers. The opposites of the numbers in the list above would be: -1, -2.9, -3.14159, -40000, and -0.0005. Negative numbers are less than zero.
We do not consider zero to be a positive or negative number. The sign of a number refers to whether the number is positive or negative, for example, the sign of -3.2 is negative, and the sign of 442 is positive.
The following fractions are all equal:
(-1)/3, 1/(-3), -(1/3) and - 1/3.
The following mixed numbers are all equal:
-1 1/6, -(1 1/6), (-7)/6, 7/(-6), and - 7/6.
The Number Line
The number line is a line labeled with positive and negative numbers in increasing order from left to right, that extends in both directions, like the one drawn on the blackboard for the kids above. The number line shown below is just a small piece of the number line from -4 to 4.
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A woman in a bar tries to pick up a mathematician.
"How old, do you think, am I?" she asks coyly.
"Well - 18 by that fire in your eyes, 19 by that glow on your cheeks, 20 by that radiance of your face, and adding that up is something you can probably do for yourself..."
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Oh, rxtales, you're right: The average ejaculate contains about 3-5 ml of fluid, is comprised of mostly sugars and various proteins. Overall, each ejaculate is between 5 and 7 calories, so there are 9 calories in every 2 teaspoons.
Oh, but there's still more to come, rx: The average ejaculate, laden with between 200 and 300 million sperm, amounts to about about 5 calories. These are derived from protein, including enzymes, and sugars (mainly fructose) secreted into semen by the prostate gland to provide the sperm with the energy to swim.
Other 'ingredients' present in semen include :
Water
Vitamin C
Citric acid
Phosphate and bicarbonates, to regulate acidity.
Zinc
Prostaglandins
For comparison, a greasy cheeseburger contains over 500 calories, so to equal one junk-food attack you'd need to gulp down over 100 ejaculates. Comforting thought... means... you're not wasting time, rxtales!! A greasy cheeseburger instead?
%%%%%%%
10cc is an English art rock band who achieved their greatest commercial success in the 1970s. Initially comprising four musicians, Mr. Rocco.
Oh, but there's still more to come, rx: The average ejaculate, laden with between 200 and 300 million sperm, amounts to about about 5 calories. These are derived from protein, including enzymes, and sugars (mainly fructose) secreted into semen by the prostate gland to provide the sperm with the energy to swim.
Other 'ingredients' present in semen include :
Water
Vitamin C
Citric acid
Phosphate and bicarbonates, to regulate acidity.
Zinc
Prostaglandins
For comparison, a greasy cheeseburger contains over 500 calories, so to equal one junk-food attack you'd need to gulp down over 100 ejaculates. Comforting thought... means... you're not wasting time, rxtales!! A greasy cheeseburger instead?
%%%%%%%
10cc is an English art rock band who achieved their greatest commercial success in the 1970s. Initially comprising four musicians, Mr. Rocco.
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In a biology class, the Prof. was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A young female (freshman) raised her hand and asked "If I understand, you're saying there is a lot of glucose, as in sugar in male semen?"
"That's correct", responded the Prof., going on to add statistical info. Raising her hand again, the girl asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?". After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing, the poor girl's face turned bright red, and as she realized exactly what she had inadvertently said (or rather implied), she picked up her books without a word and walked out of class.... and never returned. However, as she was going out the door, the Prof.'s reply was classic...
Totally straight-faced he answered her question, "It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not the back of your throat.".
"That's correct", responded the Prof., going on to add statistical info. Raising her hand again, the girl asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?". After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing, the poor girl's face turned bright red, and as she realized exactly what she had inadvertently said (or rather implied), she picked up her books without a word and walked out of class.... and never returned. However, as she was going out the door, the Prof.'s reply was classic...
Totally straight-faced he answered her question, "It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not the back of your throat.".
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Cheating Spouse? Possible Infidelity? Get The Semen Spy Detection Spy Kit!
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This cow boy is gonna feel a suddent jerk and got jet forward as hell, darnit!!
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Late Home. It will be boring after you have endured holding steady on the saddle for ten years, Rocco!!!
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!"
His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife's ass and say, 'How about a blowjob?' ....And she's always sound asleep."
Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes up and yells at me for staying out so late!"
His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wife's ass and say, 'How about a blowjob?' ....And she's always sound asleep."
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Mr. Rocco, -italian name- I wish you'd marry Techgaddess and invite me to your wedding. I've got a big bank account to show immigration officials. Dr. Phil's advice.
Ah, don't you give Techgoddes too much rope: probably she won't hold, ha, ha!!
Ah, don't you give Techgoddes too much rope: probably she won't hold, ha, ha!!
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Two cowboys were sitting in a bar when one asked his friend if he had heard of the new sex position called rodeo. His friend says no, what is it?
Well you mount your wife from the back, reach around and cup her breasts with both hands.
Then say, "Boy, those are almost as nice as your sisters".
Then see if you can hold on for 8 seconds.
For how long would Rocco hold on at rodeo position here?
Q. What did the the tropical storm say to the palm tree?
R. Hold on to your nuts. I'm coming for a great blow job.
Well you mount your wife from the back, reach around and cup her breasts with both hands.
Then say, "Boy, those are almost as nice as your sisters".
Then see if you can hold on for 8 seconds.
For how long would Rocco hold on at rodeo position here?
Q. What did the the tropical storm say to the palm tree?
R. Hold on to your nuts. I'm coming for a great blow job.
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Thank you. Here's another joke that probably you have heard of many times, refreshment is necessary.
HAND CREAM!
There once were two priests, father Dick and father Ray. One day after a very long mass, the two priests decided to hit the showers, halfway through there showers the priests realized that there was no soap. So, father Ray says to Father dick "I have extra soap in my room, I'll go get some".
So he leaves to fetch the soap and doesn't bother to get dressed becuase who would still be in the church at such a late hour? So he comes back from his room with two bars of soap and is walking down the hall when suddenly he hears voices coming around the corner, so with his quick thinking he froze to the wall, stiff as a statue.
The voices turned out to be that of three nuns, who, when saw him standing there like a statue stopped to look at and admire him complimenting at how realistic he looks and what a nice body he has. When suddenly one of the nuns reaches out and grabbed his penis.
Startled, he dropped a bar of soap, with this the nun said "Oh look, a soap dispencer", wanting to test the first nuns theory the second nun reaches out and also grabs his penis, again he drops a bar of soap. With this the nun says "Yes it's true, it is a soap dispencer".
Wanting to get her share of soap and excitement too, the third nun reaches out and grabs his penis.
But nothing happended for he was all out of soap, so she goes on yanking and pulling his penis for the next few minutes until, to her delight, she squeals "Oh! Look, handcream!"
HAND CREAM!
There once were two priests, father Dick and father Ray. One day after a very long mass, the two priests decided to hit the showers, halfway through there showers the priests realized that there was no soap. So, father Ray says to Father dick "I have extra soap in my room, I'll go get some".
So he leaves to fetch the soap and doesn't bother to get dressed becuase who would still be in the church at such a late hour? So he comes back from his room with two bars of soap and is walking down the hall when suddenly he hears voices coming around the corner, so with his quick thinking he froze to the wall, stiff as a statue.
The voices turned out to be that of three nuns, who, when saw him standing there like a statue stopped to look at and admire him complimenting at how realistic he looks and what a nice body he has. When suddenly one of the nuns reaches out and grabbed his penis.
Startled, he dropped a bar of soap, with this the nun said "Oh look, a soap dispencer", wanting to test the first nuns theory the second nun reaches out and also grabs his penis, again he drops a bar of soap. With this the nun says "Yes it's true, it is a soap dispencer".
Wanting to get her share of soap and excitement too, the third nun reaches out and grabs his penis.
But nothing happended for he was all out of soap, so she goes on yanking and pulling his penis for the next few minutes until, to her delight, she squeals "Oh! Look, handcream!"
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Two cowboys walk into a roadhouse to wash the trail dust from their throats. They stand at the bar, drinking their beers and talking quietly about cattle prices. Suddenly a woman at a table behind them, who had been eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so it becomes apparent that she is in real distress, and the cowboys turn to look at her. "Kin ya swaller?" asks one of the cowboys. No, signals the woman, desperately shaking her head. "Kin ya breathe?" asks the other. The woman, beginning to turn a bitblue, shakes her head. "No" again. The first cowboy walks over to her, lifts up the back of her skirt, yanks down her knickers, and slowly runs his tongue up and down the woman's behind. This shocks the woman to a violent spasm, the obstruction flies out of her mouth, and she begins to breathe again. The cowboy slowly walks back over to the bar and proudly takes a drink of his beer. His partner says in admiraton, "Ya know, I'd heard of that there Hind Lick Maneuver, but I ain't never seen nobody do it."
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Here, again, all keys are worn out as a result of striking too many SSSSSSSSS........ SEX keys by Mark Snake.
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Yeah, Rocco, especially as you are about to get my next story called: "THE SHIFT STICK" which I have just typed on this special type writter.