Active Ink Slinger
Well, finally, they run into this... some more extra work now.
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marcosurbina
Over 90 days ago
Male, 75
Mexico
Forum
Active Ink Slinger
This is mathematical demonstration why a woman means problems…
Active Ink Slinger
Here’s a very funny method to make speeding motorists slow down on the streets… As they see the hole, they surely will slow down. No doubt an ingenious method… This fake hole is a nice idea…
Active Ink Slinger
Ja, ja! This one wa superb:
"Persons selected to be can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help after Forced Termination)."
And I'm scared because I fall within the 50 rank age. This way I was selected, and then... the SHAFT... I suppose.
"Persons selected to be can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help after Forced Termination)."
And I'm scared because I fall within the 50 rank age. This way I was selected, and then... the SHAFT... I suppose.
Active Ink Slinger
This is a very interesting chain lock maze… I have no idea what is the use of this maze, but it is funny… I will buy one of these soon…
Active Ink Slinger
The Buffalo Theory
The "Buffolo Theory" of Beer..
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers, and that's why beer is so GOOD for you!
The "Buffolo Theory" of Beer..
A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.
This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers, and that's why beer is so GOOD for you!
Active Ink Slinger
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables. When he picked up a CD player to stuff into his sack, he heard a strange disembodied voice come through the darkness: "Jesus is watching you."
He nearly jumped out of his skin! He shut off his flashlight and waited... When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and resumed searching for more valuables. Just as he disconnected the stereo, he heard again, clear as a bell:
Completely freaked, he shone his light around looking for the source of the voice. In a corner of the room the beam came to rest upon an African parrot.
"Did you say that?!" he hissed at the parrot.
"Yep," the bird replied. "I'm just trying to warn you."
The burglar visibly relaxed. "Warn me, huh?! Who the heck are you?"
"Moses," replied the parrot.
The burglar laughed, "What kind of stupid people would name a parrot Moses?"
"Probably," the bird answered, "the same kind of people who would name a rottweiler Jesus."
He nearly jumped out of his skin! He shut off his flashlight and waited... When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and resumed searching for more valuables. Just as he disconnected the stereo, he heard again, clear as a bell:
Completely freaked, he shone his light around looking for the source of the voice. In a corner of the room the beam came to rest upon an African parrot.
"Did you say that?!" he hissed at the parrot.
"Yep," the bird replied. "I'm just trying to warn you."
The burglar visibly relaxed. "Warn me, huh?! Who the heck are you?"
"Moses," replied the parrot.
The burglar laughed, "What kind of stupid people would name a parrot Moses?"
"Probably," the bird answered, "the same kind of people who would name a rottweiler Jesus."
Active Ink Slinger
Batman, get her a soap, please.
Or probably this diet Coke didn't work for her.
Or probably this diet Coke didn't work for her.
Active Ink Slinger
What a terriffic, tremendous, excellent accident Santa had this time. I once saw an insignificant midl air colission with a Boeing 727, but this time... well, at least officers are investigating how Santa got in the way.
Active Ink Slinger
It’s funny how this guy is reading on the laptop… It is holding the laptop like a book…
Russia stopped-gas
Russia stopped-gas
Active Ink Slinger
Not sure if that is a real book… Maybe yes… But this book has a funny name…
Active Ink Slinger
I thought this was your ID, Batman. This is the name of a boy from Singapore… It is not a joke… it is his real name… Your family lived in Singapore many years ago?
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This is one of my favorites. Does this reminds you of something, Batman?
Active Ink Slinger
A bride who got a little too drunk at her wedding recepcion was still determined to say a few words of thanks to the guests for all their presents. She stumbled through a short speech and then slowly turned to point to the presents on display, which included a coffee percolator.
“And finally…” she said, “I do thank my new parents-in-law for giving us such a beautiful perky copulator.”
“And finally…” she said, “I do thank my new parents-in-law for giving us such a beautiful perky copulator.”
Active Ink Slinger
Ah, not only nickers, also bathing suits with Nike logo on it.
You can use any of these credit cards, no problem.
Active Ink Slinger
I don't know if the babes are Chinese, Japaneese, but they are fantastic. These teams are very sexy. The first two photos show the team with the coach Rocco...
Active Ink Slinger
That doesn't matter, Rocco -Italian name. What's important is the art of the work, ja, ja, ja. Perhaps you're too curious. It's just your gift from... uh...
Active Ink Slinger
As a tribute to administrator team, Rocco, Nicola, Pam, Batman, Techgoddes, Chef,
I here consider it a honor my friends knew this airliner I boarded. I took this shot half an hour
before departure time, of the Boeing 737 - 700.
Thank you, enjoy the sight.
I here consider it a honor my friends knew this airliner I boarded. I took this shot half an hour
before departure time, of the Boeing 737 - 700.
Thank you, enjoy the sight.
Active Ink Slinger
This is a very serious asian girl studying anatomy… I’ve never seen such a hard-working student…
Here’s the truth…What’s inside a computer mouse?
Oh, Nicola: you'd better slice it. More easy to eat a cucumber salad.
Here’s the truth…What’s inside a computer mouse?
Oh, Nicola: you'd better slice it. More easy to eat a cucumber salad.
Active Ink Slinger
Ok, Nicola... Thank you Bat man. Can you guess here what is the enormous hole beneath the bath room? I do know what it is and what's intended for.
Active Ink Slinger
No, I think my memory failed me, Nicole. it's "Escape from Alcatraz", Clint Eastwood, 1970. I was 19 at the time. This convicted who escape was never found or his whereabouts.
Active Ink Slinger
A drunk man who smelled like a beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The mans tie was stained, his face was smeared with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began to read. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked:
- Say Father, what causes arthritis?
The priest replies:
"My son, its caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol and comtempt for your fellow man."
-Well, I'll be darned -the drunk muttered, returning to his newspaper. The priest thinking about what he said, nudged the drunk and apologised:
"Im sorry to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I dont have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
%%%%%%%
Drunk
A man has too much to drink at a party. His friends offer to drive him home, but he says no -he only lives a mile away. About five blocks from the party, the police pull him over for weaving and ask his to get out of the car and walk the line. Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a call for a robbery taking place in a house just a block away.
The police tell him to say put; they will be right back -and they run down the street to the robbery. After a few minutes, the man decides to drive home. When he get there, he tells his wife he is going to bed, and to tell anyone who might come looking for him he has the flu and has been in bed all day.
A few hours later, the police knock on the door. They ask if a Mr. Marcos lives there, and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day. The police ask to see his car and she asks shy. They insist on seeing his car, so she takes them to the garage and opens the door-where they find the police car, lights still flashing.
- Say Father, what causes arthritis?
The priest replies:
"My son, its caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol and comtempt for your fellow man."
-Well, I'll be darned -the drunk muttered, returning to his newspaper. The priest thinking about what he said, nudged the drunk and apologised:
"Im sorry to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I dont have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
%%%%%%%
Drunk
A man has too much to drink at a party. His friends offer to drive him home, but he says no -he only lives a mile away. About five blocks from the party, the police pull him over for weaving and ask his to get out of the car and walk the line. Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a call for a robbery taking place in a house just a block away.
The police tell him to say put; they will be right back -and they run down the street to the robbery. After a few minutes, the man decides to drive home. When he get there, he tells his wife he is going to bed, and to tell anyone who might come looking for him he has the flu and has been in bed all day.
A few hours later, the police knock on the door. They ask if a Mr. Marcos lives there, and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day. The police ask to see his car and she asks shy. They insist on seeing his car, so she takes them to the garage and opens the door-where they find the police car, lights still flashing.
Active Ink Slinger
Never, ever give up!
Last sunday, I had to catch my plane back to Yucatan early in the morning -the 7:30 flight, Mexicana. But as I was heading for the boarding gate to check in, I climbed on these stairs to ride after the girl showing her white panties. I got too dizzy at the sight of this.
Last sunday, I had to catch my plane back to Yucatan early in the morning -the 7:30 flight, Mexicana. But as I was heading for the boarding gate to check in, I climbed on these stairs to ride after the girl showing her white panties. I got too dizzy at the sight of this.
Active Ink Slinger
Tough job!
Well, you just try to figure out what Spider Man came up with...
Oh, Wonder Woman... found a job at a laundrymat?
Well, uh... sorry... this is me. Nicola sure will like this. I'm opening the door for Nicola.
Well, you just try to figure out what Spider Man came up with...
Oh, Wonder Woman... found a job at a laundrymat?
Well, uh... sorry... this is me. Nicola sure will like this. I'm opening the door for Nicola.
