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martb40
1 month ago
Fluid Male, 54
0 miles · Mentor
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Quote by Curiosity72
Me n the wife have done it at the top of a waterfall where we were almost caught.... As well as in the middle of the bush on a not so public dirt rd
That's cool Curiosity. No matter where you are outside you're always liable to bump into someone. That makes it so exciting. When you're doing your thing and you hear the voices coming towards you is the best.
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Quote by Crows_kitten
I'm not a guy, but I can give you one tip that helped me immensely when being introduced to anal play was help your body to associate it with pleasure. When I was first getting used to it, my Master would talk with me to keep me relaxed, but at the same time have me play with my clit a bit while stretching/preparing so that my body became conditioned to associate anal play with pleasure and for the most part that makes things much easier and enjoyable.
For a guy, I'm going to go out on a limb and assume that the same thing can be done, but I could be completely wrong. I do hope that this helps some for you, though. Best of luck
Thanks Kitten. Every little helps. I haven't tried the pleasure part, usually because I don't seem to have enough hands lol. But I guess when I bring my partner into the equation it will become easier. I think there was a real breakthrough today as I finally relaxed enough to insert something without pain. Thanks again for your help.
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Quote by candyflossbaby
Didn't see this topic on the search so thought I'd ask you guys myself, do you find tattoo'd women sexy? If so, what kind of tattoos and where on the body do you find them most appealing.
I ask because I'm becoming increasingly more obsessed with 'painting my canvas' as I call it, I live ink and think its a great way to show individuality. My bf says he loves tattoo'd women and eggs me on to get them, but my worry is tht there may be a line to cross where having a few sexy tattoos may turn into something tht looks a little more butch. What's your guys opinions?
I think anywhere is oK as long as you leave your neck and face free. I'm not a fan of boob tats either but arms, back, Vajayjay ankles, thighs etc are hot.
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Ok guys. Thanks for the help. I've been doing a little experimenting with your suggestions and I think I have it almost cracked, so to speak. Lots of lube, then 1 finger, then 2 fingers. Here's where it important. A tapered glass dildo slides in very easily and gives that little bit of stretch to relax the sphincter muscle. After that I found that I could get some of my wife's sizable dildo's in my ass with some degree of comfort. The most positive aspect of this is that there is little or no lingering discomfort now, though there was a little blood when I was done experimenting. Nothing much though. I guess there is only so much stretching you can do even with the best preperation! Thank you all for your suggestions.
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Quote by 1lush
I love it, we had sex on a walk bridge in the middle of town one evening. The sound of the water was over the top for me it was great because houses on both sides as well as the streets. Was well worth chance of being caught.
That sounds totally hot. I like the idea of being where we can be spied on easily. And time we we have sex in an open area we get so turned on.
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Quote by kylie_kained
Try to relax fully if you think it's going to hurt then you subconciously with tighten yourself up. Already your using a lube which is always a good thing.
Thanks Kylie. I've been relaxing as much as possible. I've even had some success. It just makes me uncomfortable or a couple of days after I've been playing. I would like to have a little more permanent give if you know what I mean.
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Quote by DutchMike88
Hi Martb40,
I'm also not gay but do enjoy some anal pleasure from time to time. When I introduce anal sex to a new bedpartner I always go very very slow and let them get used to the idea at all and then the size. But after some experimenting I found that in the cases I've been presented with its usually between the ears.
My last girlfriend loved anal stimulation and we've tried various things. At some point we bought a new buttplug and she thought it was huge and would never fit. One night a while later I let her put on a blindfold and made her relax on the bed. Took care of the seen, fresh sheets, good temperature et cetra. I started to gently touch her all over her body, kiss her everywhere.. All the while she had to stay silent on the bed.. until she was craving for some penetration or any other serious stimulation.
I started to go down on her.. well to detailed already anyway.. used one finger for her rectum and one for her pussy. Get her wet and ready. Then(while she was still blindfolded) I lubed up the new buttplug and while stimulating her pussy and clit started to work it inside. She never knew it was the big one until I later during sex took of the blindfold and she saw it in the mirror.
Same goes for myself.. I always started small but when we got some new stuff and she came back from a business trip we tried them on me. I hadn't been stimulated anally for months but within no time I could take 4.5 cm in diameter(the biggest I've ever had) just because I was very relaxed and eager.
My point is.. mindset and full relaxation of the body and mind make more possible then you think. As soon as you think something will be to big you're rectum will react and make it to big.
In my experience anyway. Hope this helps you.
Thank you Mike. I will try to relax a bit more and take things slowly. I have been doing that though. Maybe I should try to have my partner try to insert it for me!
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Quote by Shemale_lover
Im not a guy but I think I can help haha, basically try with fingers first! Wear a glove or something if you want, just rub the outside of it to relax it and then when your ready try and push one in! If that hurts play with yourself to relax then try a bit again, keep doing this until its comfortable with one finger and then work from there
Thanks lover. I have been trying to gently and gradually loosen myself with some success but next time I try I am as tight as ever. I start off with 1 finger, then 2 then increase from there. It does take a long time to get myself loose enough to get anything more substantial in though.
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Quote by Nat4fun
I always fantasize about being whored out. Not loaned to others....actually being a whore. My partner would set the encounters up, set the price, and i would have to comply.
I always liked the thought of being 'forced' to do things I didn't want to do. Good one. Thanks Nat.
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Quote by radi0act1ve
I would like a house with a nice yard, a white fence, and a dungeon in the basement.
Oh wait were you aiming for fantasies of a sexual nature? Um...hmm...er...you know I really can't think of one that I haven't discussed with one or both of my partners. I'm lucky enough to have found someone(s) that, to date, have not been freaked out by most of the stuff that comes out of my mouth.
I do understand wanting to hide a fantasy from your partner though. Had a girlfriend that was a policewoman and I went months just dying to have her beat me with her nightstick. Didn't tell her though, because I knew she would find it unsettling to say the least. It resulted in the relationship ending because she felt I was "too closed off". Sometimes it's a matter of the fantasy being too extreme for your partner, sometimes it's a matter of not wanting them to take it as a hint even though you aren't giving them one.
Agreed Radi0act1ve. I think that not sharing can lead to it's own problems. Being able to talk with your partner(s) about these desires, fantasies etc can be liberating as long as they understand that the thoughts are just something that comes unbidden into your head and that you understand that the reality may not be anything like the fantasy. Thanks for the comment :-)
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Quote by Metilda
My fantasies involve extreme, illicit, and horrendous behavior.
I don't want him to think I'm fucked in the head (though I know I am) and I don't want him to think that fantasizing means I want to engage in the activity. I just think about it to get off - not fantasizing to actually do it. I'm also pretty sure it would hurt his feelings. So - no. Not telling you or him. Telling him would only complicate my life that much more. Tellin you is like airing my filthy laundry.
Thanks Metilda. I think that's how most people feel about the fantasies they don't share. We think that if we tell our partners they will see us as monsters or that they will be hurt by the nastiness that gets us hot, that sometimes doesn't involve them OR involves them in a way they would never see themselves. I bet even he has some fantasies that you would be amazed at. I know that I, like you have some fucked up stuff in my head that, for some reason unknown to me, gets me really going. I recently found that my wife, too, has fantasies that I never thought possible for her. The thing is, now that I know a little about what goes through her head, I can use her thoughts and fantasies to make things better for her without having to actually fulfill those fantasies. At the end of the day, as long as we understand that the fucked up shit that our mind uses to turn us on are just that, fantasies, and should remain so, we won't have any problems. But since I started sharing the stuff I feel is messed up, my wife gets as turned on by some of my fantasies as I do. It took a long time but it's worth it in the end. Small bits at first though. I wouldn't suggest dumping all your weird stuff on him all at once. And who knows, he may have far stranger shit in his head than you have in yours. Men, in general are more open to that stuff I think.
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Quote by DutchMike88
Martb40, I'd advice you to read My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday and give it to your partner after. I've not fully read it but it got me to understand why some women find it hard to talk about.
I also borrowed the book to my ex and to a friend who's a girl. It helped them both to explore and be open about it more.
Thanks Mike. I'll check it out!
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Guys are visual and if something doesn't turn him on visually he won't get turned on mentally. Why not try to cut out the problem are and maybe make him wear a blindfold. That way he won't have that negative stimulus to stop him going through with it. and if you're sucking him or he's playing with you at the same time his mind will be occupied with that. It's always easier to go with these scenarios when you're already turned on.
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Glass is the winner here I think. Though silicone is popular also. Glass is so versatile. It can be heated or cooled as you like, is stiff enough to stimulate internally without having to put too much pressure on it and the twists, waves ridges and nubs all help to get her there. Thanks for your input ladies.
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Quote by Sirene_Jaune
I gave hand jobs to my lover on a train recently. We didn't get caught, though the time before this couple totally knew what I was doing, they were giggling and nudging each other. Ok and I gave oral in the train's toilet. I was to chicken to fuck.
That sounds totally hot. And as long as you don't have much to lose it would be worth the risk.
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Quote by Slutsharon
I think it is worth the risk. I've been caught before, but have never been in any serious
trouble. I don't mind when I am caught, turns me on to know that someone is watching
me. As far as cops go, they are pretty laid back in my area
I would agree with you that it's worth the risk in general but when the consequences of being caught include you both losing your jobs it make's it a bit less straight forward.
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Having sex in a public place has always been a huge turn-on for lots of people, guys and girls both, but with cops cracking down on the usual spots where one might go for a bit of harmless fun, is it worth the risk of being arrested by some over-zealous park ranger and have your ass in court? I like to be a little bold when it comes to this but how does everyone else feel?
