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sprite
12 hours ago
Moderator
Fluid Female
United States
Forum
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Buz
I am a serial seat lifter. I break into houses and raise the toilet seats. Sprite's house is my favorite target...
i actually have a hard fast rule about guests putting down the toilet seat on account of my cat uses it as a stepping stone and i don't like having to fish her out of the toilet. consider yourself on notice. do it again and i'm changing your forum rank to 'dead man walking'.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Green_Man
I am impressed that they got the judging done right on time. That was great. And we had a top 15 this time, rather than a top 10. Gives one an idea of the talent involved.
I'll have my cup of java, Rump man. Hmm... no one around? I'll see if I can get this contraption working. Folks will have to wait a few minutes for Big Bertha to get moving.
OOps. You are here, Rump? I took a wrong turn on the forum path. Greetings all early birds.
i told Nikki that if she got the results out on time i'd send her more nudes. seems to work every time.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Verbal
I hope everyone is having a Good Friday.
Even though my girls are teens, I will still hide a bunch of plastic eggs late Saturday night/early Sunday morning for them to hunt for. All the eggs will have candy except for two, which will have dollar bills in them (the prospect of an ENTIRE DOLLAR used to thrill them, now they find the dollar rather jejune). The best part of this caper is finding unfound eggs six-eight months down the road, with the candy nasty and hard as a rock, and eating it anyway.
Another suggestion for the short story list. Rather bizarre and twisted fantasy by Kelly Link, called Catskin. I read it in McSweeney's initially. Very, very good. Here it is: http://www.lightspeedmagazine.com/fiction/catskin/
A Fůrball please.
try $20. hell, you do that, i might even come over and join in.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by GabrielSweet
First off, dear sprite, you forget the difference. YOU go to the bathroom, sit down, complete said task and go back to bed. WE have to walk into the room of course leaving the light off or we would be blinded and never sleep again, then stand in one spot while swaying (we either rarely wake completely or have been drinking before bed) and aim a steam into a opening about the size of a 5 gallon bucket. So, have a little heart......
now to answer the OP, I check each time, even now when I live alone.... that water is COLD.
i have it on good authority, that guys can sit and pee, so if they have trouble hitting the target, and there's a girl in the house, might i suggest they do that?
shush, you. you're special. 
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Magical_felix
When you're a guy in the gym.. DO NOT encroach on anyone's space. Just be cool. Just bullshit with your friends (only a little, like a minute or less), lift your weights, swim your laps, hit the zone with the kettlebells and "other" equipment, say hey to the staff and other regulars, take a class or two, steam it up, enjoy yourself... Just don't be a douche. Just be cool as fuck, when you look in the mirror and you think "fuck, I'm cool and sexy as FUCK..." You're good.
IF YOU BUILD IT, THE PUSSY WILL COME.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Sprite, she wrote: Poetry is currently being judged. We've been asked to turn in our results by March 31.
Me, I wrote: Thanks for the 'heads up', your Spriteness. I do not envy the challenge facing you and the other judges.
Ya want coffee, tea or maybe, ME, he asks in a burst of groundless optimism and clichéd bad taste. ;)
correction: winners SHOULD be announced March 31. just turned in my list. some very strong entries this time around.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by TonyaL
Excited momma here. My boy received his acceptance letter from Ohio Technical College in the Rod and Custom program. This certificate makes it so much more real than just all the talks we've had. This'll be a very exciting time for him to grow on his own. He will also be learning something he is very passionate about. I'm very proud of him. How odd is it that he will be going to college and my littley will be starting preschool.
so, is he actually going to be learning how to customize hot rods and cars? cause that sounds really cool! learning a trade is under-rated these days and if he gets good, he'll be in demand - doesn't suck that it's something he loves, either. that's awesome, Tonya.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by Verbal
I don't flirt in the gym because a) I don't belong to a gym, and 2) I'm really bad at flirting.
and c) Layla hired me to keep an eye on you. she said, and i quote: if you ever catch him flirting in a gym, you have my permission to give him a beat down. sorry, but i take my assignments seriously.
Her Royal Spriteness
Quote by RumpleForeskin
Greetings to all literary lounge lizards who come here to bask in the radiance of all the writer-type talk...among many other things. ;)
IMO, instead of reading 21st century short stories, give those published in the 20th and even 19th century a read. You ask, why? Because there were viable markets for short fiction 'back when'. That's simply not the case these days.
Check out: Flannery O'Connor, Eudora Welty, O. Henry, Poe, P.G. Wodehouse. Each in their own, unique, way were brilliant writers and except for Wodehouse, primarily as short form writers.
Best I can tell, it's about time to start buggin Nic & Co. about the poetry contest results and info on the next contest. Yeah, I know, it's a dirty, dangerous, thankless job but then... .
Come to think of it, a few drinks and assorted BS might be a mo' better alternative. Big Bertha is all fired up and ready to put out for one and all. There's also our infamous line-up of beers, wines and fine lickers. So whadda ya denizen of this den of depravity wanna drink?
Poetry is currently being judged. We've been asked to turn in our results by March 31.
