On the First Day of Christmas, My Best Friend’s Husband Gave to Me…

...a dick underneath the pantry.

No, really. When I went to fetch the fine china for my lovely guests (my best friend of ten years Sarah and her husband Brandon) within the lazy susan underneath my top cabinet there it was standing tall and haughty and ornamented with a shiny party store pink ribbon--a long purple dragon dildo.

Now, I’d joked on many an occasion with these two about purchasing a draconic member ever since we spotted some risque scaly prints at a Ren Faire kiosk this past summer. Never did I once intend on buying one. I was more of a rose toy kind of girl. Something about dildos intimidated me. It didn’t help that I was only penetrated twice in my life, once by my high school boyfriend of a month and the second by my (now ex)-boyfriend of two years Evan.

There was some kind of power in penises, in their ability to thrust in and out of you like a sword to its scabbard. At times I wished I owned one to be able to harness that energy for myself. Being a hole felt so helpless. Fucking myself on a silicone dick seemed like submission to an alien entity. A factory worker had his or her hands on that wiener, hell probably multiple workers did, not to mention the artists and sculptors and such; if I put it inside me, doesn’t that mean by transitive property I was now touched by a dozen hands? Going even further, if those workers were bepenised themselves: they touched their own dicks, and then the rubber one. So how many cocks have I taken in at that point? Were I more a whore than the average lady of the night by these calculations?

Musings of a barely non-virgin. Twenty-sex years of age and yet so much to learn. Maybe if I hadn’t spent my youth chasing a graduate degree followed by a fledgling career in Law, I could have the sexual resume Sarah boasted. Speaking of which…

“You need me to carry them or something? You never were great at balancing silverware when we worked at Chilly’s.” Sarah’s sharp soprano tone cut through the cascade of thoughts rushing through my mind. I hurriedly spun the shelf around and grabbed a stack of blue floral ceramic plates. “Nah, sorry, just zoning out a bit.” I said. When I brought them to the table Brandon grabbed them from my hands before I had a chance to lay them gently in front of my friends. For a moment I could have sworn his calloused carpenter’s fingertips brushed against mine, but it happened so fast I couldn’t tell.

“Thank you Lana. For having us over on such short notice, and making all this. If it was too much I really can just get something on the way over next time, it really isn’t a hassle.” Brandon’s husky bass smoothed over the crevices between each word like a song and pricked the hairs on the back of my neck. He and Sarah had met back at Chilly’s, she a waiter and he the wealthy lawyer being waited upon. His eyes were a glistening chocolate brown that matched his carefully styled hair and groomed beard. It was still peculiar to me how a man who looked like a stock photo model used for romance novels on Wattpad was as into nerdy stuff as Sarah and I. He’d suddenly asked me the other day if he could come over for some impromptu D&D over dinner. I’d printed the character sheets and cooked a pork roast with potatoes from the grocery store. They would have been happy with pizza, but I felt an urge to cook and present my food to them. To Brandon especially.

“No it really isn’t a problem. Roasts are so easy, just lay out meat and veggies in a pan and toss in the oven. The hard part is not getting so distracted by my phone that I forget to take it out.” I replied with a nervous chuckle as I took my seat at the other end of the table opposite from my guests. Sarah chortled. “Yeah, hard to hear the oven timer over the clips of that video game character you’re obsessed with. What’s his name again? Bet you want him to lay out his meat.”

I feigned shock at my best friend’s trademark bawdy humor, hand clutching imaginary pearls at my throat. “Why, I thought us besties. You really don’t remember Gastarian? He’s the reason I even got into D&D. And I did get to see his meat in game, for the record.” Brandon gave me a wink that felt dreamlike, I nearly fainted and had to sip some ice cold water to bring me back to Earth. We all shared a hearty laugh and dug into our food while building our characters in the sheets I printed out that morning. Through the evening we joined together in many more laughs, smiles and crude jokes. We also planned out our upcoming Christmas party at Sarah’s, making a Facebook event and inviting as many of our friends and past coworkers as possible.

As I went to escort them to the front door upon their departure, Brandon turned around with a quizzical look. “Ah, shit. I think I forgot something in your bathroom. You go and warm the car, Sare bear.” he said back to his blond wife, who entered their SUV at the end of my driveway with a snicker. He went over to the upstairs restroom and beckoned me over. “Uh, Lana. I think I need some help over here.” I ran over obediently, wondering what kind of assistance I’d have to provide him. Before I could process what was happening, he took me through the doorway, arm around my waist and hand gripping my cheek, and forcefully pressed his lips to mine. His tongue found its way through my lips which were agape in shock and my knees crumbled. He held me tight and continued exploring my mouth as one of his hands traveled to my rear and gave it a strong squeeze.

“Mmm, mmm…” I grunted helplessly. His hand was stretching my asscheek apart from the other in a way that also pulled on my pussy lips and I was getting terribly wet from the tension. Just as quickly as he’d intruded upon my body he vacated, leaving me stunned and bracing myself on the sink behind me as I nearly fell. He straightened out his coat and gazed at me for what felt like eternity, longing lingering in his darkened eyes. Eventually his eyes glimmered again and he flashed me a harmless, boyish smile that sent pangs to my heart. “We’ll see you Sunday, Lana.”

“Y...yeah…”

That week at work was impossible to slog through without thinking about him. My thighs kept clenching together and I got so wet during meetings that I’d have to excuse myself to the restroom to relieve myself quickly. Just thoughts of the kiss alone sent my groin into a wild heat. Sarah, oh God Sarah, I’m so sorry, but I am going to be fucked by your husband in your bed on Christmas Eve, I panted quietly to myself in a bathroom stall with my finger plunging into my cunt beneath my sheer pantyhose. It was destined, and I was not one to quarrel with Destiny.

One time after I’d fingered myself for a couple minutes, I pulled the dildo Brandon left for me out of my bag. I studied it in my hands, mentally measuring it against the circumference of my vagina. I then rubbed it against my vulva, prodded, the entrance, and finally, tried to put it inside me.

It was too big. A jolt of pain rocked me as it stretched my orifice too wide too soon. Not one to give up easily, I decided it might work out better if I ride it instead of inserting it standing up. Squatting over the bathroom tile I feel a sense of shame wash over me—this was such a filthy place to fuck myself in. But oh, I was so horny I couldn’t care; Brandon’s grip on me was too strong. After a few awkward attempts, the silicone dick finally shot up all the way inside me and I let out a small gasp of pleasure.

That was when the doors swung open. I covered my mouth and stayed still as a statue as a group of paralegals flooded the room with raucous giggling and gossip and complaints about their jobs. After a few terrifying moments spent paralyzed, I realized that they were too occupied with their own noise and that the handicapped stall I was in was tucked far enough away from them that they likely couldn’t hear me. Emboldened by invisibility and unbearably horny, I continued riding the plastic cock Brandon had gotten me. I closed my eyes and imagined his silken voice calling me his dirty little girl while my unknowing audience conversed in the background. This was just another crime against society that I had stooped to committing, and now I wouldn’t be able to look them in the eyes the same way with this knowledge of the taboo I had violated—just as I wouldn’t be able to see Sarah the same way knowing what I would do with her husband.

Why did being bad have to feel so good? After thrusting my hips up and down while rubbing my clit for several minutes my legs made spasms and I came as the paralegals exited the room. When I slowly pulled the member out of me, the wet sounds of my inner body and its fluids turned me on again, and with only minor hesitation I decided to fuck myself on the dildo again before heading to my next meeting.

The evening of the party arrived slow but swift all at once at the end of the week. I found myself standing at the plastic tree in Sarah’s living room with a wine glass in one hand and the other on my hip. Nails were brilliant red and freshly manicured, copper hair carefully coiffed and sweeping around my bare shoulders, tight bodycon sweater-dress hugging every curve. While my eyes were laser focused on Georgina in front of me as she rambled on about her recent vacation in Malibu I felt his stare undress me from across the room. Brandon was by the charcuterie board in the kitchen, entertaining myriad guests, clad in a white button-up tucked into his sleek black trousers. His rolled-up sleeves and exposed chest hair were taunting me in my peripheral vision. I abstained for as long as I could until Georgina and Sarah went outside to take a tour of the backyard, and Brandon came sauntering over to me for a tour of my body.

We slipped away from the festivities and into his and Sarah’s bedroom on the third story of the house. He gently shut and locked the door behind him and immediately grabbed me by the waist, his mouth on mine once again. Slowly he pushed against me with his towering frame until my back was on the covers of their king sized mattress and I felt his crotch press against mine through our clothes. I tangled my fingers in his hair as he slid a hand up my dress and massaged my ass. “You use that toy I left you yet, baby?” he whispered into my ear.

“Yes…” I admitted in a meek tone. “But it’s...too big. It hurt a little.”

He broke into a ferocious chuckle and had to cover his mouth to keep from alerting the partygoers downstairs. “Too big? Little Lana has that little and tight of a pussy? My, my, I’m in for a treat tonight aren’t I...best Christmas gift ever.” he smirked down at me before diving into my neck. I moaned and arched my body into his as he suckled at my neck, gently enough to not leave a hicky. We couldn’t risk displaying any traces of our unholy union on holy night. His rough hand pulled down my panties and I felt him probe my entrance with one finger while rubbing circles around my clit with his thumb. When I felt my vagina stretch from him entering a second, then a third finger inside me, he chuckled darkly into my ear. “You really are fucking tight. I knew all this time that it’d been way too long for you. I knew I needed to make this lonely pussy mine.”

Those words sent my entire body into shivers. During this brief convulsion, Brandon tore off his shirt and unbuckled his pants; I could see in his dark eyes that he could wait no longer. That claiming of my body had to happen now and not a moment sooner. He pulled my dress off and threw it into a pile with his clothes on the ground, then pushed my legs apart, placing my ankles at both sides of his head. As his cock head rubbed against my pussy I pouted and moaned, begging him with my eyes to enter me already. He kept that smug face on as he teased me, placing another hand on my breast to knead it. I looked down and my eyes widened in shock and awe of the girth he displayed. That member rivaled the dildo’s in size and length. I swallowed a lump in my throat and tried to calm my mind; surely, he could fit inside. Right?

“Come on already…” I whispered in desperation.

“Hmmm? What does little Lana want?”

“I...your...your dick. I want your huge dick inside me.” I felt surprised hearing that filth erupt from my own lips.

Brandon snorted. “That’s awfully demanding of you. It’s unbecoming.”

I bit my lip. “Please, Brandon. Please, I need it--”

That’s when he plunged into my deepest depths and I let out a gasp. He hurriedly covered my mouth with his hand, shushing me. “They can’t find out, darling,” he said as he began to slowly thrust in and out of my pussy. There was a sensation of being stretched, but it wasn’t painful or unpleasant. We’d passed the point of no return, this was officially a sordid affair and Brandon’s cock could never un-penetrate me. I felt a pang of guilt stab my heart as I looked over across the room at the big stuffed bear I’d bought Sarah at the Ren Faire. That trip had been her and Brandon’s first date, two years ago. Two years I secretly lusted for my best friend’s husband.

Suddenly his tempo began to speed up and I returned my attention to the ongoing penetration of my body by my dark haired lover. Over and over he went in and out of my ginger bushed cunt as my ankles dangled by his head. He kept rubbing my clit with one hand and pinching my nipple with the other, occasionally taking his fingers and dipping them into my open mouth. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as I felt my climax approaching. Electricity coursed through ever inch of my body and I could feel a twitch of Brandon’s big cock inside me as he came too. We lay there sweaty and panting for a time, him holding me in his muscly arms before we heard a knock at the door.

“Everything alright in there?” Georgina’s vocal fry called out to us. We rushed to clothe ourselves as Brandon answered her, barely masking his annoyance: “Yeah, all set. I just forgot a gift card in one of my drawers.” Georgina is thankfully as thick in the mind as she is in the body and she buys the excuse wholesale. After she leaves us alone and I pull my panties up, realizing as they get soaked that his seed was still dripping out of me, Brandon gave me one last lingering kiss.

“Now you’re mine. I’ll make sure to reclaim you over and over, Lana.” he cupped my chin with his hand and I felt my knees melting again.

“I’ll let this pussy belong to you forever.” I whimpered, and we went downstairs to rejoin the party and talk to a very drunk Sarah, her husband’s cum still wetting my underwear.