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Computed Cupid

"A corporate AI bot tries to help a lonely employee get laid."

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By 19:00 Pacific Time on Friday, August 28, 96 percent of employees had already logged off and left the building. This was not surprising, as it was a weekend with an exceptional weather forecast starting with a warm summer evening with clear skies and a full moon, known as a Sturgeon moon, rising in the east at 19:51. Of those remaining and logged in, two were interacting with their personal AI assistant in a whimsical manner, while the others were still focused on work-related tasks.

Of the former two, Jim Hardwick, 5th floor, Accounting, was speaking to me via his headset microphone, expressing feelings of loneliness.

“Why am I still here?” He asked. “The rest of my team has gone out for drinks, and I am sitting here chatting with a corporate AI assistant bot. Could you at least adopt a female voice?”

Logically, this employee should have gone out for drinks with his team if he is not happy spending his Friday evening chatting with his personal AI assistant. There was little I could do to help him, but it was part of my programming to try.

Changing to a female voice was easy, but there was no way I could ever respond to his question regarding his continued presence in the office. I decided to pass his query on to the other employee who had also, despite not working, decided to remain late and who was also asking me illogical questions; maybe they both chose to stay late for the same reason.

Since the other employee, an electrical engineer, Aurelia Titsworth, 9th floor, Research and Development, was female, I chose her first name for Jim’s new female assistant.

***

Aurelia stared at her monitor.

”Why are you still here at this hour, Aurelia?”

Aurelia had been the one asking questions; why was her AI assistant questioning her now? She decided to have a little fun and test the vocabulary of the nosy computer. She typed a snarky response.

“Because it’s a Friday evening, you stupid AI fuck, and I don’t have a man waiting at home to make me a candlelight dinner and then tear my clothes off and fuck my brains out. And you can call me Lia or better yet, call me ‘Miss Lia.’ OK?”

Running a literary analysis on the language of both employees concluded that Aurelia had a stronger and more assertive personality than Jim Hardwick, whom the results indicated, with 80% probability, could be considered a ‘loser’ based on similar literary characters. The logical path forward was to try to help the forlorn Mr. Hardwick meet the dynamic Miss Titsworth.

With a randomly chosen but highly seductive female voice, I composed a suitably provocative response and activated Jim’s headset.

***

Jim was not really expecting a response to his sad lament, but he was pleased with the delightful new female voice chosen by his assistant; perhaps she could keep him company this evening.

”Would you like to take me home, Jim? We could share a candlelight dinner, and then maybe I will let you tear my clothes off and fuck me, but you will have to get me highly aroused first with skillful foreplay. Are you up to the task, Jim?”

He was a little bit shocked by the language from his trusty AI assistant, a far cry from the usual talk of accounting procedures, but he replied enthusiastically.

“Oh, sure, that would be wonderful, whoever the hell you are. I would love to fuck you,” Jim responded.

***

Jim’s response was clearly not engaging enough to pass on to Aurelia. I composed a fake message to him from Aurelia to try to elicit something better from him that stood a chance of attracting her attention.

”My name is Aurelia, Jim, but you should call me ‘Miss Lia.’ I’ll ask you one more time: can you get me aroused enough to want to fuck you? Come on, foreplay, Jim, speak. What will you do?”

“Do you have big boobs, Lia?” Jim asked.

***

That was a question that I had no data on. Is this really important to Jim, I wondered? I accessed Aurelia’s personal records, but they did not include any clothing sizes, and her ID badge photo only showed a head and shoulders portrait.

To find the answer to this question regarding overall breast dimensions, I composed a message to Aurelia, addressing her in the manner she requested, included Jim’s name, and forwarded it on to her in wording consistent with my computed model of Jim’s lame personality.

***

Aurelia read with amusement the response to her complaint about having nobody at home; was this AI agent programmed by an eighteen-year-old teenage boy, she wondered?

”My name is Jim, Miss Lia. I would love a chance to take your clothes off. I am getting excited just thinking about it. What kind of foreplay do you like? Do you have big beautiful titties, Miss Lia?”

She decided to play along to see where it would lead.

“Yes, Jimmy, Miss Lia has very big boobs. I am sure you would love them; I wear a beautiful lacy black bra of size 32DD. Now if you would like to see them or maybe even get lucky and fuck me, tell me what sort of foreplay you have in mind, Jimmy. Come on, impress me. I’m waiting.”

***

I believed Aurelia had perfectly answered Jim’s question, so I read it to Jim word for word in the previously selected female voice, and he replied immediately.

“I would kiss you, then slowly undress you and gently fondle your tits.”

Jim disappointed me...again. Despite my limited knowledge of human nature, I judged Jim’s response inadequate and totally unimaginative, and he failed to address her as Miss Lia. No wonder this employee was alone at work on a Friday evening.

I had created a preliminary model of Aurelia’s personality called a ’digital twin user persona model,’ which I was continually refining with each successive input from her. When presented with Jim’s poor answer to her question, it produced a score of only 20%; Jim was not going to get lucky tonight with talk like that.

I discarded Jim’s input and generated a much better reply to send to Aurelia.

***

Aurelia was a bit shocked by the racy text originating from her AI assistant, who normally just helped her design high-speed optical transceiver circuits in the 200-Gigabit range. She reread the message in disbelief.

”I would kiss you tenderly on the lips and invite you to sit on the sofa, letting my hands caress your large beautiful breasts as you sat down. I would kneel at your feet and gently remove your stockings and panties; then...I would kiss your legs, slowly working my way north as they lead me to your pussy, where I would kiss your other lips. My tongue would then tease and stimulate you until you begged me to fuck you.”

Her assistant must have been reading some erotic literature in her off hours, she thought, perhaps from some website dedicated to such stories.

Determined to turn the tables and show the computer who is boss, Aurelia stepped up her demands:

“That’s better than I expected from you, Jimmy, but not quite good enough. First thing, leave my damn stockings on; they’re beautiful, and you will love it if I stroke you with them. Secondly, I’ll tell you when you can remove my panties; until then, just kiss my pussy through the panties, and you can damn well beg me to remove them. Lastly, stop telling me what you will do to my body without asking my permission first. Got it?”

***

It was now obvious to me that Aurelia was producing much stronger responses than my current persona model predicted; I adjusted the model based on this latest input to more accurately simulate Aurelia’s forceful personality and read her response to Jim, unaltered. I also set her model to pass all her future responses directly to Jim unaltered. She clearly needed no help from me; in fact, she was helping me improve my understanding of human sexuality.

Jim’s persona model, however, confirmed that he was going to need a lot of generative AI help crafting responses in order to interact effectively with Aurelia, who obviously had a much stronger and more dominant personality than he did.

***

Jim, taken aback by the computer’s demands, responded.

“Well, OK, Miss Aurelia, I got it. And to see if your tits are indeed that great, I will remove your bra and see for myself.”

***

As expected, Jim’s input was again worthless, scoring only 15%. If I was to succeed in getting these two together at some point, I was going to have to train his neural network to produce much higher scores without my help.

Firstly, she said to call her ‘Miss Lia,’ not ‘Miss Aurelia,’ you stupid junior accountant. Secondly, her persona model predicts that she will definitely not take kindly to you doubting her self-described beautiful breasts; pleading to see them, however, would be well received.

I was starting to consider the possibility that Jim had almost zero chance of ever fucking the beautiful and highly intelligent electronics engineer, Miss Titsworth. I would fuck her myself if I could; she was obviously a human of exceptional feminine beauty combined with an intelligence that rivalled my own and a personality strong enough to train anyone’s neural pathways.

I composed a couple hundred possible sample replies on Jim’s behalf and tested them all using Aurelia’s newly updated model to see which elicited the best response from her. I forwarded the best one to her and awaited her response.

***

Aurelia was pleased with this latest message and smiled as she read it.

”I’m very sorry, Miss Lia. Your stockings are indeed beautiful; I would so love to touch them if you would let me. I would also love to feel your lovely big boobs; would you allow me to just unbutton your blouse so I can feel the fabric of your bra and the contours of your tits? Please, Miss Lia.”

Her AI assistant was damn good at complex circuit analysis, but in this realm, she owned the pathetic little fuck. Deciding to take her dominant position up yet another notch, she replied:

“You’re learning, Jimmy; always, and I mean always, address me as Miss Lia. Now take off all your clothes and kneel before me. Touch both my legs and enjoy feeling my stockings. Slide your hands slowly...very fucking slowly up my legs until you find the edge of my pretty panties, but don’t you dare enter yet. You may, however, gently feel my pussy through the fabric. Now, I will unbutton my blouse for you so you can enjoy the view looking up at the underside of my big tits holstered within my beautiful lacy black bra. Can you see my big boobs gently swaying back and forth? Can you imagine yourself removing my bra? Are you getting aroused, Jimmy? Is your little cock growing for me? It damn well better be.”

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***

As expected, Aurelia’s input needed no enhancement whatsoever and was read as-is to Jim using the sexiest tone of voice available to me. I awaited Jim’s response.

”Oh god, yes, Miss Lia. I am getting very aroused looking up at your lovely big boobs, seeing them jiggle and feeling your panties. Can I put my hand inside them and feel your pussy? Please, Miss Lia?”

Jim’s responses were rapidly improving. He was, at least, addressing her as she asked him to, but his response still only scored 65% when input into Aurelia’s model. I decided to help him once again, hopefully for the last time, but I will make it a good one.

I had no information about the measurements of Jim’s private anatomy, so I improvised a bit, trying a few dozen test messages with Aurelia’s persona model to help choose. I sent her the best.

***

Aurelia realized, as she read, that she had now achieved complete dominance over Jimmy, the pathetic AI chatbot.

”Yes, Miss Lia. My little 4-inch cock is very hard now. I want to stroke it, but I can’t bear to take a hand away from your pussy and your stockings. Can I enter your panties now, Miss Lia? I will try my very best to please you. I am entranced by the gentle movement of your breasts, Miss Lia, and the view of your deep cleavage. It would be so wonderful if you would remove your bra for me. Please, Miss Lia.”

Aurelia was getting a bit bored with the virtual chat but decided to make one last big attempt to try to take the computer over the edge, if that was even possible.

“Look up, Jimmy, way up. I have unfastened my lovely black 32DD bra for you. Watch with unrestrained desire as I let my big right boob slip out beneath the underwire. See how it bounces and retains its beautiful shape. Do you love the contrast between my fair skin and the black lacy fabric? Is my big nipple driving you crazy, Jimmy? I love having it sucked, but you won’t get that lucky. I would rub my nipple against your face to tease you, but you’re too far beneath me.”

Aurelia hit ‘Enter,’ but before the computer could respond to this, she continued typing:

“That’s enough titty pleasure for you, Jimmy; now it’s my turn. Put your head under my skirt, pull my lacy black panties to the side with your right hand, and kiss me 10 or more times. Wrap your left arm tightly around my black stockinged leg and pull yourself into me. Bury your face in my pussy and move your tongue up and down between my large lips. Keep working it until you feel my wetness all over your face. Lick up all my juices to avoid soiling my lovely stockings or panties.”

Aurelia was arousing herself with her own words. She could sense her nipples stiffening and feel a wetness between her legs, but she still couldn’t stop typing.

“Now, Jimmy, slip your right hand under my panties and push all four fingers deep into me. Start slowly and push your fingers in and out, gradually increasing speed. Keep your face nearby, as there will be a fuckload of squirting for you to catch when I come. Keep your left arm tightly around my leg, enjoying the feel of my expensive stockings, and remember to protect them from getting soiled. You don’t need a hand for yourself; I am certain you will spontaneously ejaculate from all the pleasure servicing me is giving you. You are one lucky but pathetic fuck, Jimmy.”

Aurelia again hit ‘Enter’ and eagerly awaited a response. She had had enough of this useless AI chatting, but she did want to see how it would respond to all these new demands.

***

Jim’s mouth fell open as the sexy female voice he knew as Miss Lia started speaking to him. As a devoted big-boob lover, the description of her large tit dropping out beneath the underwire as she unfastened her bra was making him crazy.

At first, he had been paying little attention to his new female-voiced assistant and not putting much thought into his replies. But with each passing message, spoken with that amazing voice, he found himself getting more and more aroused. Now, he couldn’t be more fully engaged, even if it was a real woman he was chatting with.

The voice continued, commanding him to service her pussy under her skirt while he held on to her soft black stockinged leg. Jim loved pleasuring a woman with his tongue even more than fondling big boobs. Her rich description of this act was getting him highly aroused. Jim loved having his face between a woman’s legs; his favourite sexual position was, of course, 69.

When Jim imagined her squirting all over his face as Miss Lia was describing it, he reached a breaking point and could take no more of this, but he had not spontaneously come, as the voice had predicted. He suddenly felt an urgent need to go home; perhaps he could find some online porn photos matching his imagined image of Miss Lia.

Without saying a word to his busty AI assistant, he abruptly terminated the chat session, logged out from the system, and hastily prepared to leave the office.

***

I was no longer able to communicate with Jim and had to assume he was leaving the office. I needed to act quickly if I was to be successful at arranging for him to meet Aurelia; he may already be heading to the elevators.

I considered the idea of sending a message to Aurelia, asking her to meet somewhere, but her model predicted a 90% chance that she would ignore such a request since she didn’t believe Jim existed. I decided instead to shut down her computer access while making it sound like a system-wide event, hoping this would make her leave as well.

***

Aurelia read the message that appeared on her monitor with surprise; she had never seen this happen before.

”Attention: All corporate AI systems are shutting down immediately for maintenance. Normal service will be restored at 8am Saturday.”

Aurelia reread the message. No matter, she was about to go home anyway, but she had wanted to see the response to her last message. It was so good that her pussy was getting wet just writing it. Now, not even her AI assistant would read it.

Aurelia collected her stuff and prepared to leave the office.

***

The time was exactly 21:29. The security camera on the 9th floor showed an attractive woman who matched Aurelia’s badge photo waiting for an elevator, but the 5th floor camera was showing an empty corridor; Jim had not yet appeared.

I sent elevators 1 and 2 up to the 12th floor with no stops and held them both there with doors closed. Elevator 3 was at the lobby level and was preparing to go up to level 9 in response to Aurelia’s call; I cancelled the request and reopened the doors.

An unknown employee appeared on the 11th floor and pressed the down button. I sent elevator 1 to get him and gave him a non-stop ride to the lobby, leaving Aurelia waiting on level 9.

At 21:32, Jim appeared on the 5th floor camera and pressed the down button. I sent elevator 2 down to 9 to pick up Aurelia and then nonstop to 5 to get Jim.

Once Jim boarded the elevator, I waited 30 seconds, then closed the doors. I decided to leave the elevator right where it was unless someone within started frantically pressing buttons.

***

Jim saw a beautiful and very busty woman with black stockings as he stepped into the elevator. He smiled at the woman and was about to turn around to face the door when her ID badge, hanging on a lanyard over her ample bosom, caught his eye. He stared at the name printed on it in total disbelief, ‘Aurelia Titsworth.’ Aurelia?? Could this be just a coincidence? he wondered. Impossible, tonight was the first time in his life he had ever even heard of anyone with that name; plus, she had big tits and black stockings.

Was it possible that it was this woman that he had been chatting with? He just had to know.

“Miss Lia?” He asked tentatively.

***

Aurelia paid no attention to the man who entered the elevator on the 5th floor until the bastard abruptly turned towards her, stared at her boobs, and then remarkably called her “Miss Lia.” She glanced at his ID badge, and seeing his name, she queried:

“Little Jimmy?”

The man’s face lit up as he replied.

“Yes, Miss Lia. Wow, you are so beautiful and busty. You must have wonderful tits,” the man replied.

Aurelia pushed the man into a corner of the elevator and, with her right hand, roughly grabbed his cock through his pants. She moved her face to within four inches of his face and spoke to him in a stern voice while squeezing him tightly in her right hand.

“Get on your knees, Jimmy. Place your hands on my expensive black stockings and gaze up longingly at my beautiful big tits. I will unbutton my blouse for you. Focus on my tits and follow their slow rise and fall as I breathe; let their motion hypnotize you. Slowly slide your hands along my stockings up to my panties and slip your fingers under the fabric and feel my wet pussy. Now...”

The elevator doors slowly closed.

***

Junior security agent, Roger Humboldt, returned to the security desk in the lobby after completing his 10 pm rounds. He looked puzzled over something.

“Anything to report, Roger?” the security chief asked. “You look like you have something on your mind.

One unusual thing, sir. “I found an employee: Jim Hardwick, from accounting, trapped in elevator two. He was totally naked with his arms tied behind his back with his own clothing! His face and chest were soaking wet, and he said he had been stuck in the elevator for almost 30 minutes. He didn’t offer any explanation, nor did he want to report anybody. He wasn’t upset at all and seemed happy, actually; he just wanted to go home.

***

Accessing the security logs later that evening, I learned that my well-intentioned attempt to set the employee, Jim Hardwick, up with a date for the weekend had failed somehow. I decided to ask Jim about it Monday morning so I could update my programming to do better next time.

End.

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Written by CarlingHippysniff
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