I'd always wondered if I was gay, but I'd never had the nerves to find out. I didn't know any gay people, and where I grew up most people were homophobic, so I never had a chance to experiment. I'd tried getting with girls but something always felt empty about it, like I was just going through the motions.
But every time I slept with someone I couldn't help but imagine what it was like to be on the bottom, or on my knees sucking cock. And every time I watched porn I found myself imagining myself in the place of the girl, focusing on nothing but cock. I tried to change it, but nothing worked. It was just how I was.
I'd always heard rumours that Conor was gay, but I never really believed them. That, or I just put them to one side, secretly knowing what I wanted to happen. It was strange to people that we were friends at all. We were from the same estate but I was shy and kept to myself, while he was a loud, social guy.
He was stocky and well over six foot, while I was lithe and shorter than most people I knew. To be honest, we didn't have anything in common, other than that we both smoked. It was strange to me that we were friends as well. Until one night, when I found out what he really wanted.
He texted me just after ten, telling me to come round and smoke with him. I was already ready for bed, but something about the way he texted me made me rush to get dressed and go meet him. The tone of how he spoke to me, how he told me rather than asked me, triggered something buried deep inside me. I knew I had to go to him.
I pulled on some track pants and a t-shirt, looking at myself for a second in the mirror before I left. I'd always been ashamed of my body. I had an hourglass build, and was almost hairless. It was like a woman's body. But I didn't dwell on it long before walking over the estate to Conor's flat.
When I got in he was already smoking. There was something different in how he looked at me, a little glint in his eye that I'd never seen before. His shirt was off, his muscular chest out, and he was wearing nothing but a pair of grey track pants. I could see his bulge through the corner of my eye, but I walked over to the couch anyway, sitting down next to him.
We chatted for a bit, ignoring whatever was playing on the TV, but the whole time I could feel him staring at me like a piece of meat. And the more he stared, the more I realised I liked it. I knew I shouldn't be doing it, but it just made me want it more.
Once he realised I wasn't going to leave I felt his muscular hand squeeze my thigh, a smug little smile creeping across his face. I couldn't stop myself from smiling back, rooted to the spot in both fear and lust, and soon his hand crept all the way up my thigh to find the back of my track pants, sliding in to cup my round, feminine ass in his palm.
I felt a rush of blood to my dick, my whole body lighting up in lust and confusion. I wanted to do something, but I could barely move. He helped me along, bringing his free hand over to rest my shaking palm on his bulge as he moved his face in so close to mine that I could feel the heat of his breath on my face.
I stroked him gently through the fabric of his pants as he pawed at my ass, panting into my ear as he squeezed my soft cheeks hard. The more he felt me up, the more nerve I found to play back with him until I was grabbing and stroking at the outline of his dick properly. The nerves melted away, and all of a sudden there was nothing in me but lust. My mouth watered as I looked down at his giant cock, every hard squeeze of his hand on my ass feeling like heaven.
He obviously saw my change in mood and decided he could go even further, reaching over to grab the bottom of my t-shirt and pull it up over my head. The warm air of the flat on my naked skin pushed me even higher, and I ran my own free hand up his stomach to his powerful chest as I turned my body in towards him, slouching my legs across the couch like a woman in a harem.
He rewarded me with a light slap on my ass, followed by a slightly harder one, and another, harder one after that. I knew he was toying with me, but I wanted it. All I did was yelp in pleasure, keeping one hand on his cock and the other on his muscular chest as I smiled up at him.
Now he knew he could take me even further, he wasted no time, grabbing the waistband of both my boxers and my track pants and sliding them down in one quick motion. I helped him along the way, kicking them down my legs and towards the TV until I was slouched naked on his couch, leaning down into his leg as I stroked his cock. Any kind of nerves had left my body by now.
All I could think of was his dick. We stayed like that for a little while, his rough hand exploring my smooth, girly body, sliding up and down my back and grabbing my ass, until I finally felt his fingers sink into my hair, and his hand grab the back of my head. I knew what was next.