“Just one minute!” Maddie shouts from the bathroom, dragging her last word out in a sing-song lilt.

She’s not usually high-maintenance, but this is Halloween. I collapse back onto the couch, hoping our Uber doesn’t show up too fast.  

I barely get a few doomscrolls in before the bathroom door creaks open in my bedroom.

Then, clicks. The sharp sound of heels on hardwood. 

I’m on my feet in an instant. She’s been buzzing ever since I invited her to my friends’ party, but somehow managed to keep her costume a total secret. Not that I pushed too hard.

Still, nothing could’ve prepared me for this.

Her pumps appear first. Then her legs, sheathed in dark pantyhose. A glossy black corset cinches her waist, pushing her breasts just high enough to make my brain short-circuit. 

She steps into full view, lips curled in a shy smile, cheeks pink above the white bow tie around her throat. Matching cuffs circle her wrists. A black headband, tipped with two upright furry ears, completes the look.

Maddie basks in my gawking before slowly turning around to reveal a fluffy white bunny tail. It’s not sitting where I would expect it to be, right between her uncovered cheeks rather than higher up on the bodysuit.

By the time she slowly shakes her ass, my mind is gone. She peeks over her shoulder, happy to watch me unravel.

My hands find her waist without thinking. I tug her close, desperate for my mouth to catch some part of her.

“Hey!” Maddie grins, pressing a hand to my chest. “I worked too hard on my makeup to let you wreck it with your grabby paws. You like my costume?”

Maddie steps back, biting her lip. Waiting for my answer. As if it’s not written all over my face.

“I think I’m going to need a minute to recover,” I say, hoping the words hit with at least half the weight they should.

Her face lights up instantly.

“Thanks, it’s DIY!” she beams, then falters just a little. “It’s not…too much, right? I don’t want your friends thinking I’m a slut.”

I chuckle. “Honestly? Compared to some of the other girls there, you’ll look downright modest.”

“Good,” she says, tone softening. Then, sharper again: “What about your costume?”

I gesture behind me to the coffee table. Maddie leans around me to spot the cheap top hat and even cheaper plastic wand. Her disappointed pout is immediate. I tug at the red bowtie fastened around the collar of my otherwise boring black suit.

Only then does it click in my head.

The magician and his bunny. Well, his slutty bunny in my case.

“How’d you guess?” I ask, narrowing my eyes.

Maddie blushes.  Caught. 

“Maybe I looked through Naomi’s Insta,” she says in a rush. “Wanted to see what your friends usually wear for Halloween. Turns out, you’ve worn the same exact costume for, like, five years…”

I sigh. I should be disturbed that she cyber-stalked my ex-fiancée. But with Maddie? Somehow, it tracks.

“This is a really shitty costume, by the way,” she adds, brow arched in mock disapproval. “You’re lucky I even agreed to come.”

She snatches the hat and stretches up onto her toes, planting it on my head like she’s humoring a toddler. Then she hands me the wand, looking like she’s doing me a huge favor.

My phone dings in my pocket.

“Uber’s here,” I mutter, lust, affection, and mild irritation all wrestling for dominance.

“Let’s go!” she chirps, already skipping toward the door.

I catch another glimpse of the bunny tail, perfectly centered between her barely concealed ass cheeks.

“How are you supposed to sit down with that thing?” I ask, helping her into her coat. “It’s way too low.”

All this witticism earns me is a passionate rant about the perils of DIY costuming and the difficulty of sewing through satin. One that carries us all the way down the stairs.

===

We’re standing in front of Trevor’s front door. Dampened music, voices, and laughter already filter out of the house.

“One last thing,” I hurriedly add as the doorbell rings. “Trevor’s girlfriend, Jules, is forty. Don’t make it weird.”

Maddie gives me a pointed look, full of consternation. Yeah, yeah. Irony noted. We’re only five years apart, though.

“Welcome to the house of horrors,” groans a mummy who sounds exactly like Trevor as the door swings open. 

“Oh, hey, Maddie!” He continues when he notices I’m not alone.

Maddie flashes her friendliest smile as I slide her coat off.

“Hi, Trevor. Your place is beautiful.”

“Why, thank you,” comes a smooth voice behind him.

Jules steps forward, tall and statuesque in a sleek witch costume with just the right amount of sexiness. She’s been with Trevor for a few years now, always gracious, always effortlessly put-together. As far as I can tell, dating Trevor is her only lapse in taste.

But the second she clocks Maddie, all that decorum flies right out the window.

“Oh my God,” she coos, immediately taking Maddie’s hand and giving her a gentle twirl. “You’re the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”

To my absolute delight, Maddie flushes crimson. Not exactly the effect she was going for.

“Roman,” Jules says. “Where did you find such a cute little bunny?”

“Uh,” I freeze, then recover with the new party line. “Childhood friend. Maddie, this is Jules.”

“Hello”, Maddie stutters, still beet red.

“Oh, that’s nice,” Jules concludes. “Well, Maddie, why don’t I show you around?”

With that, she pulls her behind her and leads her deeper inside. Maddie tosses me a panicked glance over her shoulder as she disappears, the sound of her heels echoing after her. In Jules’ grip, all that skin Maddie’s showing feels oddly defanged.

I just wave her off.

“I knew there was something going on between you two,” Trevor says in a victorious voice as we reach the table converted into an improvised bar. “Even Jules and I don’t do matching costumes.”

I grunt. I kind of lied to his face when he first met Maddie. I pour us both a gin and tonic. His mummy costume doesn’t come with opposable thumbs.

“Sorry about not telling you last time,” I relent. “I just feel like such a creep.”

“Relax, man.” Trevor takes a deep swig. “She’s in college. So what? If you’d taken a gap year, you guys could be in the same classes.” He pauses. I can see him work out the math in his head. “Okay, maybe not classes, but the same campus.”

“It’s not just that.” I’m not sure how much to reveal. But I need the validation from my old roommate. “I’ve known her since she was a toddler. She’s my kid sister’s best friend.”

“Yeah, that’s a bit weird. Still, it’s not the end of the world.” He nods toward Maddie, whom Jules just dumped on an unsuspecting group of Village People. “She doesn’t look traumatised.”

I smile. He is right. Maddie is back to her bubbly, flirty self. She’s already bouncing on her heels, engaged in an animated conversation with a guy in a construction hat.

“Besides,” Trevor adds in a conspirational tone. “Naomi is going to be so pissed when she sees you together.”

“About that… Is she coming tonight?”

But the doorbell rings again, and Trevor slips away, cackling.

Crap. I thought Trevor went on my pile of stuff after the breakup.  But looking around the room, I can definitely spot quite a few people I’d label as “Naomi’s friends”.

Jules’ tastefully furnished living room is barely recognizable under the metric ton of fake spider webs and plastic decor strewn around. People cluster in small groups, and the music is not too loud yet, so snippets of conversation mingle with the orange glow of the lights.

I knock back the rest of my drink and pour another, grabbing a beer for Maddie before heading out to find her. 

She’s talking with some vampire I must have met once or twice before. The boyfriend of a friend of a friend, maybe?

“Hey, Roman,” he says as I approach. I’m surprised he even knows my name. “Got any tricks for me?”

Whoever his girlfriend is, she wouldn’t love how close he’s leaning toward Maddie. She spots me and lights up, flashing me a grateful smile before accepting the beer. She plants a quick kiss on my cheek, then takes a swig.

“They’re called illusions!” I retort in a sinister voice, waving my hand like an accomplished prestidigitator. “Close your eyes.”

He actually does, with a tipsy snort.

“And now,” I drawl, lacing my fingers with Maddie’s. “I’ll make my rabbit disappear!”

She giggles as I pull her away, leaving the vampire blinking behind us.

“My hero,” Maddie says, in her sugary, sarcastic tone. 

I lead her down to the basement den, where the mood is even more relaxed than upstairs. The last rays of sunlight pour through the small egress windows. Jules is lounging on a massive sectional, holding court with a few of my friends.

When she sees us, she shifts to make space and taps the newly freed spot next to her, beckoning my bunny over. 

Maddie complies eagerly, but still takes an eternity to sit. What with her tail and all. This earns her a bright laugh from Jules, who immediately introduces her to the rest of the group.

I perch on the edge of the couch, and for the next few minutes, the conversation is all Maddie. They want to know about college, her job, how long we’ve known each other.

I’m tense at first, waiting for someone to ask the wrong thing, something that would expose me as a creep. But the gin softens the edges, and I remember no one here is out to get me. I’m not that important.

With our matching costumes and the way Maddie keeps sneaking glances at me when she thinks I’m not looking, there’s no pretending we’re just good pals. But no one pushes. My friends are tactful enough to let it lie.

Maddie, meanwhile, is thriving. She laughs easily and jokes without trying. I watch the way everyone leans in a little closer when she talks, the way she puts people at ease.

She’s just… good at this. More of a social butterfly than I’ll ever be. I feel oddly proud.

It’s already dark out when I finally decide to get up. Maddie’s eyes follow my every move.

I stretch out my hand, maybe a little theatrical. “Dance?”

A proud smile spreads across her face.

“I was starting to think you weren’t into bunny girls,” she teases as I pull her up. 

I shake my head, trying not to smile, and we head upstairs. The vibe’s shifted completely. The music is louder now, pulsing through my chest. People are dancing, yelling, spilling drinks.

Maddie leans in close, her lips brushing my ear. “Be right back. I gotta pee.”

I nod, and she disappears into the crowd while I make for the bar to grab another gin and tonic.

“Hello, Roman.”

I flinch, then turn. There she is.

Naomi shares my taste for cheap costumes. She’s wearing a plain black tank top tucked into matching mini shorts. Eyeliner whiskers on her cheeks and a pair of cat-ear barrettes clipped into her hair.

I really do have a type. 

“Hello,” I say, uneasy. “You look great!”

“So do you,” she says, sounding almost surprised. “Do you have a moment?”

Has she heard about Maddie? Word travels fast at a party like this.

“Sure.”

I follow her into the kitchen. She leans against the counter, looking at me with a strange expression.

“How are you doing?” Naomi asks, somewhat condescending.

I shrug, not quite sure what she wants me to say. “I’m okay. It’s been a weird few months.” 

I’m about to return the question when she cuts me off.

“Just because we’re not together anymore, doesn’t mean I don’t care about you,” she continues. “I’m not proud of where I left things between us. I’d hate to think I was cruel toward you in any way.”

There we go again. I can see her needling the hem of her costume on her thigh. She feels guilty, and I’m supposed to make her feel better about breaking up with me. I thought we were past that.

I’m still chewing on what to say when I hear heels clicking behind me. Naomi’s eyes flick wide.

“Hey,” Maddie chirps, slipping her fresh fingers between mine. “I was looking for you everywhere. Oh. Hi, Naomi!” 

“What’s this?” Naomi snaps, a crack of anger in her voice.

I hesitate, turning to gaze at Maddie. Her eyes are right on me, a glimmer of uncertainty playing within them. For some reason, this puts a fire under me.

“We’ve been dating for a little while now,” I declare, focusing back on Naomi.

Even without looking at her, I can feel Maddie jolting up next to me. Her grip tightens.

“Oh, wow,” Naomi mutters. “Didn’t waste your time, did you?”

She shakes her head and turns, already halfway gone. “Can’t believe I actually felt bad for dumping you.”

The hurt in her voice knocks the wind out of me. I shouldn’t have rubbed Maddie in her face like that. I’m better than this.

My blonde bunny girl doesn’t share my guilt. She’s beaming, looking up at me with a smile so bright it borders on smug. 

“I heard something about dancing?” she says, barely able to contain the giddiness in her voice.

What’s done is done. I drag a hand over my face. No point in letting my lack of social grace ruin her night too.

“Let’s roll.”

Naomi’s nowhere to be found when we reenter the living room. I shrug off my jacket and toss my top hat onto the sofa. Maddie watches, eyes gleaming, as I roll up the sleeves of my fitted shirt. She steps in close, slides off my bow tie, and undoes two buttons, just enough to reveal the top of my chest hair.

“You look so hot when you try,” she purrs in my ear, her fingers grazing the skin she’s just exposed. “I’m dripping. Can’t believe we’re actually dating now.”

She emphasizes the word like a trophy. And judging by the heat in her eyes, this victory’s only just begun to sink in.

The dance floor is packed, bodies swaying in tight circles, giving us the perfect excuse to stay tangled together. My guilt is already waning, wiped away by Maddie’s smile, her mouth on mine, the slow grind of her hips against my thigh. 

We’re not the only couple necking, but after a particularly intense kiss, I hear a drunken cheer. Trevor’s standing a few feet away, wearing a stupid grin. He tries to give us both thumbs up, but can only produce his fists, wrapped in linen.

Jules flicks his ear, then pulls him into an affectionate embrace of her own, dragging him among the crowd.

It’s a miracle I remember to grab the rest of my costume and Maddie’s coat before we head home. 

I leave our Uber driver a generous tip to apologize for the full five-minute makeout session in the backseat of his offensively well-lit Prius.

To my own surprise, Maddie pulls away when my apartment door closes behind us. She takes a step back, heels clacking loudly in my silent living room. I can’t get enough of the wicked look in her eyes.

“I need to freshen up,” she declares with as much authority as her skimpy outfit will lend her. “Go sit. Watch something. I’ll call you when I’m ready.”

My poor brain doesn’t even have time to process it. I nod like an idiot, even though she’s already walking away.

“Do not get out of your clothes,” she says over her shoulder in a serious tone before slipping into my bedroom. I hope this doesn’t mean I have to put the bow tie and top hat back on. How kinky can she get?

I plop down on the couch and undo one more button on my dress shirt, as if it’ll help vent some of the heat building under my skin. 

An old rerun of The Simpsons is on. I let myself vegetate in front of it, the alcohol still buzzing through me, making everything just a little wobbly. I do my best not to think about the tiny maniac getting herself ready in my bathroom.

“Roman,” the word drifts in enticingly after a while, and just like that, I’m under her spell again.

I have to stop myself from sprinting and try to make an entrance for her. I lean against the frame of the bedroom door when I push it open.

It’s a Herculean effort to keep my broody smile when my eyes land on her.

Maddie’s stretched out on her side across my bed, completely nude except for the bunny ears, the white bow tie, and the cuffs. The pantyhose are gone, replaced by sheer black thigh-highs that disappear into her high heels.

There’s nothing of her usual bubbliness in her face now. She’s all sultry detachment, cheek resting on her palm like she’s grown bored waiting.

Her hip swells out dramatically from the rest of her form, going on for miles. Her breasts are proudly thrust up, and her shapely belly catches the light, drawing my gaze to the pale blonde triangle nestled between her pressed thighs.

I swallow hard. Her eyes catch it, and for a second, I think she’ll break character.

Instead, with a slow, elegant shift, she rolls onto her stomach. Inch by inch, her body moves like she’s unwrapping herself. Her ass rises, round, irresistible, until a familiar tuft of white fur comes into view.

The bunny tail.

This time, she giggles when a gasp slips out of me. A second later, she playfully wiggles her butt, daring me to come closer. I’ve never been one to turn down such an invitation.

I can’t tear my eyes away from the bushy, wiggling appendage as I climb up on the bed.

“Surprise,” Maddie says, unable to keep the goofy tone from her voice. She spreads her legs slightly to make room for me, then tucks her knees under her and rises to all fours.

“Is that…” I start. But the shiver that runs through her as I cup her offered cheeks makes me lose my words. I press, just lightly, shifting her to the side to reveal a metallic glint where the tail connects, or rather, the plug.

“Yeah,” she breathes, looking at me over her shoulder. “Sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I didn’t want to spoil it for you.”

My mind...