One minute, my spouse and I were laid out in the park, enjoying cheese sandwiches, laughs, and scenery; the next, the whole place shook, causing us to drift further and further apart. No matter how much I fought to keep stable, the futility of grabbing blades of grass became more apparent as the damn planet trembled.

All of a sudden, darkness drenched my periphery, and the vibrations lessened in rambunctiousness and decibels. In fact, it started to sound very minuscule and localized.

A goddamn dream turned nightmare.

I blearily stared at the phone with a spite not felt since last I awoke from a sex dream involving a buxom celebrity. These things happen when you don’t get laid too often. Yes-yes, poor me, boo-hoo.

The display illuminated “Boss” so I hesitated to answer, but eventually did.

“Hello, boss, who is calling me on my off day.”

“Uh hi, Derrick. Really sorry to call you this early,” my boss said. “Hope I didn’t interrupt anything important.”

“Nothing at all.” I stretched into a yawn, then lumbered out of bed and shuffled to the bathroom. “What’s up?”

“Trina called out of the blue. Said she won’t be able to go in today. Can you cover for her, please?”

I initially intended to hit mute before liquid gold hit its watery target as a courtesy, but after that question, I let him have an earful. Being pissed while pissing was a new feat for me.

“Oh, come on,” I said, finishing up before flushing.

“Hey, look, if I could, I’d man the store myself, but it’s not logistically possible for me right now. I’ll give you tomorrow off and double-pay today. How’s that sound?”

I sighed. “Not thrilled, but because it’s you, I’ll help out.”

“That double-pay doesn’t hurt either, eh?”

“Hey, a brother’s gotta eat.” I entered the kitchen, took eggs out of the fridge and began the process of whipping up an omelette.

“Thank you so much for this again. And so sorry for the inconvenience.”

“Alright, just go. Should be there in under an hour.”

He thanked me again and then hung up. Irritated wasn’t the appropriate word because, outside of losing time off, I planned to pass by during Trina’s shift and get the ball rolling on making my dream a reality. No, we weren’t together. And no, I swear to God I’m not some loser stuck in a fantasy world.

Okay, maybe that’s questionable.

I’ve fancied her from the beginning of our tenure and after so much self-torture, I figured enough was enough and I had to ask her out. I didn’t have the guts to do it during a shift, be possibly rejected and have to finish the day with her, so popping in during my off period, doing it and saving myself the embarrassment, just in case, was way better.

Now, it’d have to wait, which fed my procrastination monster the nutrients it did not need. More time for self-doubt to creep in and for excuses to grow from the dank soil of my subconscious to say, “Don’t bother” or “She looks at you like a brother anyway.” Funny thing was, hardly any of the staff knew zip about her at all. Personal information stayed restrictively close to her chest because maybe she needed to hide a few bodies. Maybe she moonlighted as a crime-fighting vigilante. If I had a choice, we’d get closer, and there would no longer be a mystery to solve.

I got myself together pretty quickly, all things considered, arrived at the store and prepared for a day filled with boredom and zero wonderment. Hardly anyone came into the clothing/thrift store except for tourists, and the rate of inflation made everything in the city so damn expensive it was a wonder anyone still bothered to sniff at it.

Hours upon hours died as I read from my Kindle app and watched YouTube videos. A grand total of two separate customers perused the store for a combined total of four minutes and bought zilch. How stimulating.

Just as I was about to settle and watch a funny compilation, a beaming white couple entered with enough energy to light up the broody surroundings and my mood. Maybe the surroundings were fine, and it was just my mood.

The couple’s lady half sifted through a few racks with a querying eye as her man watched on. Banter developed between them about the various options, but uncertainty entrenched it.

“Hello there,” I said. “Need any help?”

“As a matter of fact, yes, we do,” said the woman who wore a floral sundress over her curvy body. Hooked sunglasses forced a deeper décolletage, and a scarf hung outside her basket-woven bag. Her chiseled, bald husband – I assumed since they both wore rings on the appropriate finger – grinned, making his square jaw appear more masculine. I swear to God, this guy could’ve been a superhero, and I wouldn’t have been surprised.

“This dress over here,” the husband said, pointing to another with a solid colour. “She fancies this. Where’s your dressing room?”

I moved from behind the counter and led them down a short hallway to the left and then at the very end on the right – the room’s size far exceeded the needs of our average patrons. With smiles occupying their faces, they looked at each other and went in simultaneously. I saw no need to stick around, so I resumed my post.

More minutes passed than necessary to try the dress on, so I shouted, “Everything looking good so far?”

In their delayed but unified response, they said, “So far so good.”

I thought about how absurdly cute they were together because what sense did it make, being a hater? Just because my romantic and sex life were worm food didn’t mean I had to be sour about anyone else’s. At least, I tried not to.

Another five to ten minutes passed, and still nothing from the pair, so I left my station and stood outside the dressing room. “You alright in there?”

“Uh-huh,” the wife said. “Could you come in, please?”

“We need a little help with something,” the husband said.

“Are you absolutely sure?” I asked, to which they replied in the affirmative. No immediate move on my part, but then I figured if they consented then what was the big deal?

Boy, was it a big deal.

The sight that greeted me wasn’t unpleasant, but its inappropriateness was unquestionable.  Both were butt naked. The woman’s leg draped her man’s shoulder, and they ground against each other as her ass cheeks dimpled and flexed with every mutual hip rotation.

When my reverie broke, I snapped my shocked countenance away and said, “Whooaaa, okay, I should let you finish up. In fact, you two should probably leave.”

“Shit, I told you he’d be uncomfortable,” said the gentleman. “Hey, dude, we’re so sorry it’s just…”

“Jim and I,” said the wife, “we’ve got this whole bucket list thing and sex in a changing room was on it.”

“Um, yeah sure,” I said. “Still am, getting the dress?” I peeped, and they had separated, but the lady was sashaying toward me, which turned my peep into a full-blown stare. No doubt her titties were fake, but they weren’t bolt-ons. They did a lot for me, along with her hips and booty she held in her arsenal.

“We added a little stipulation to this bucket list item,” Jim said. “If we got caught or didn’t finish before a rep called for us twice, we had to try getting them involved.”

While still staring at the wife, who stood a few inches from me and placed a palm on my chest, I asked, “Involved how?”

“Take a wild guess.” She squatted, dragging her palms down my body and leaving them attached to my thighs.  Even though I should’ve known better, the sight of her big breasts and thick, rounded ass jutting behind her upturned face caused a serious strain in my loins. Libido gave Ethics a sound beating in that moment, and before I knew it, her hands crept up to grab hold of my clothed shaft.

“Now, if you don’t want to go any further,” Jim said, “we’ll respect your wishes and leave.”

“Still buying the dress, of course,” the wife said.

“Right,” I said. “Of course.”

I exchanged glances between them, and in a brief respite of sanity, I said, “This isn’t a good idea. I really should be… this isn’t a good idea. Not that I don’t want to. I mean God, Missus, you’re smoking, but I can’t.”

The foxy lady below me looked at her husband, who nodded, and when she went to stand, I steadied her shoulders.

“What?” she asked.

“I… wait, hold on a sec.” I lightly jogged out of the room toward the store’s main part and put up the “At Lunch” sign. My body felt like rubber and a never-ending highway of nerves with each movement.  As I turned, I paused, and thoughts surrounding the scenario’s insanity intensified. No way it made sense or reflected anything right. Honestly, being right or making sense probably wasn’t all it was cracked up to be anymore.

I strolled back into the dressing room, and the wife remained in her position while the husband stood at her side, rubbing his hard cock lengthways between her pillowy lips. He reversed and lifted his hand to me as if to say, “All yours.”

As she unbuckled my pants and freed me from my bottoms, I placed my fists akimbo and chuckled louder than I intended.

“Unbelievable, ain’t it?” Jim said.

“You have absolutely no idea,” I said. “I’m not even supposed to be here, believe that?”

“Tell us more,” said the wife, who stroked me with both hands and didn’t break eye contact.

“Damn.” I tried concentrating to speak, but the sensations from her delicate palms proved effectively distracting. “I uh, was scheduled to be off – Jesus Christ – off today.”

“Wow, really?” She dipped and flicked her tongue across my balls, then dropped her squat into a kneeling position.

“Mmhmm. Covering for my crush. Was planning to pass by and ask her out finally.”

“Oh, honey, that’s so sweet.” The wife looked back at her husband who flashed a smile. Then he up nodded at her and she refocused on the task.

“And instead of that, you’re getting a handjob from my love,” Jim said.

“Yeah.” I knitted my eyebrows. “What the…” Her tongue sloshed around my glans, and in a higher-pitched voice, I said, “What the fuck.”

“Babe,” Jim said. “Stop for a sec.” Looking at me, he continued. “What do you think the likeliness of her saying yes is?”

“Being honest? Malnourished to none. She doesn’t see me that way, I think. More like a brother than anything.”

“Ouch,” the wife said with a grimace. “Sorry, fellas.”

“No, you’re okay, Cherie,” Jim said, smiling at her.  Even through the lewd situation, their emotions syncing was so damn adorable.

“I don’t know what to tell you…”

“Derrick,” I replied.

“Right. Derrick.” Cherie kept my dick within her grasp but had ceased her stroking. “If a girl sees you as a brother, it’s not looking good.”

“Yeah, dude.” Jim approached me and dropped a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t fall into a trap of putting all your eggs in one basket. I always used to do that when I was around your age. How old are you, by the way?”

“Twenty-three.”

“Exactly, you’re still pretty young, and at that age, especially if you’re not that experienced – which I’m guessing – correct me if I’m wrong.”

“Nah, you’re right.”

“Being inexperienced lulls you into that whole thing of crushing on one girl and then eventually getting your heart crushed.”

“It does,” Cherie chipped in. “Look, you’re here now, so let’s all try to have some fun, because guess what? You could’ve been home just jacking off or something.”

“But instead, you’re about to get sucked and fucked by my sexy ass wife.”

“Alright,” I said and then nearly bounced my eyebrows off my hairline. “Say what?”

“You didn’t think I’d just leave you hanging with a few licks and a handie?” Cherie restarted stroking, and when I reached full mast, she bowed forward and took me into her mouth. With each bob, more of my rod received coverage until she shoved all the way down without gagging and then backed off with a thick saliva trail. She slurped it up and then spat on my head before rubbing it in.

“Shhhit.” My back hunched and her husband smiled at her like a proud coach.

“You show him, babe,” Jim said, smiling. The stars I saw, courtesy of Cherie’s oral attentiveness, probably haven’t been documented by scientists or yet to be born. The temperature change from my glans down to the base left me in awe with each bob. When she held her position and lapped my balls while holding the back of my sack, I chanted possible incantations that could resuscitate entities resting in stubbornly sealed tombs.

“Jesus Christ…” I stared blankly at Cherie, who stared intently at me. With me entirely lodged in her oral cavity, she giggled, adding to the sensation with the vibrations of her succulent mouth and throat. Her juicy, wiggling bottom probably made me grow an extra half inch, and her titters resembled barking.

“You look so hot the way you’re sucking him off.” Jim lowered and fingered Cherie from behind, making her moan stuffily around my engorged cock. His aggressive fingering caused her buttocks to jiggle enticingly, and she posed on all fours while voraciously twisting her neck on my erection. Jim, obviously enjoying his mate’s horny display, stroked himself and ordered her to stand – albeit still bent over  – and stuffed his face with her juicy ass and cunt.

Cherie rested a hand on my thigh and held the base of my tool with the other as she withdrew and said, “Hmmm, eat your fucking lunch.” Her devious smile was so gorgeous, especially with the traces of saliva bordering her lips and dripping from her chin. She looked behind, affixed her palms to her quads and twerked onto his visage as muffled moans escaped into her womanhood. When she stopped, he spread her fleshy derriere to lick and slurp, making her face twist as she looked up at me. My cock stiffened more, which I didn’t understand because how did blood find more capillaries to fill this thing?

“I want your fat, black cock in my throat when I’m cumming,” Cherie said, her expression laminated in pure lust. “Hold my head and fuck it.”

I held it with both hands, and her soft, brown hair comforted my fingers as they pressed into her scalp, and my rigidity thrust past her uvula. I fucked her sexy face and admired her perverse stare and plush backside wobbling while her hubby consumed it. Without warning, she screamed around my thick column and bucked violently onto her husband’s face, who maintained control but allowed her enough freedom to experience the full wave set of her climax.

My cell phone rang. The vibrations shook my floor-ridden pants, and the look on the couple’s faces seemed to disapprove of me answering, but I bent and picked it up to be on the safe side.

What does he want now?

“Hey, boss, what’s up?”

“I’ve been thinking,” he said. “It doesn’t sit well with me; you having to change your plans for today, so tell you what: Everything I said before about double pay and getting tomorrow off, plus the rest of the day off when I come in.”

“Come in, you say?” I said, looking at Jim and Cherie, who then looked at each other as if formulating their next play.

“I know I said before it wasn’t possible, but I got through with a lot of stuff quicker than I thought I would, so I could be over real quick.”

“Honestly, I may as well stay here, since my original schedule’s been washed anyhow.” I gave Jim and Cherie a thumbs-up and they replied in kind.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m…” Cherie caught my softening prick with her mouth and trapped the tip between her lips while running her tongue over it. “I’m pretty damn sure.” I muted the call. “Fuuuck.”

“Alright, suit yourself. We’ll talk later.”

I unmuted. “Later, bye.” I dropped the phone onto my pants and tilted my gaze to the ceiling, accepting the fellatio from Cherie, who moaned all over my cock.

“We’re good to continue?” Jim asked.

“Hell yeah.”

“In that case, switch!”

Cherie stopped sucking to stand, spun her head to Jim and her plump backside to me. She bent over and took Jim into her mouth, eliciting a guttural laugh from the chiseled Adonis.

Cherie’s hypnotic butt left me entranced by its texture, curvature and fleshy nature. Without thought, my hands gravitated to the bubbly buns, squeezed and spread them, exposing her bleached asshole, which couldn’t have been bigger than the sharpened point of a pencil.

 “A great ass, huh?” Cherie asked after hitting pause on her blowing of Jim’s meat.  She jutted her booty into me, lifted my erection and pressed it into my abdomen – rolling it so effectively I breathed like oxygen was going out of style.

“I love your ass so much, baby,” Jim said, pulling her face toward his cock and sliding it in. “Staring’s great, but fucking’s better.”

I nodded and pulled away, letting my dick drop, and the top half slapped her meaty buttocks. I swiped it along her crack, found her slit and made my entrance. She moaned and quivered her hips, then twerked, clapping her cheeks while I remained inside. Watching them flare out and slap together repeatedly heightened the flames of lust, which led to me grabbing her waist and thrusting. I wasn’t lucky to acquire a lot of sex, but the smacking of pelvis on ass made some of the heaviest, fleshiest sounds I’d ever heard. The clop-clop-clop more resembled horses galloping than a man slamming into the bodacious booty of a fully grown woman.

My goddamn phone rang again.

The growl that escaped me should’ve been reserved for the tight, hot cunt swallowing my dick every time I bottomed out, but instead, it was due to my boss.  His ranking on my favourite persons’ list declined by the second.  I put my index finger to my lips, and Jim alerted Cherie, so they both got quiet. I picked up the device and answered.

“Hi again,” I said, trying to mask my irritation.

“Derrick, I heard what you said, but this is ridiculous. I’m about five minutes out, so I’ll be there to relieve you.”

“Whoa, I told you that’s not necessary.”

“Derrick, this isn’t a request. You’re a young man, and you deserve your rightful time off. Go somewhere and enjoy yourself.”

The frigging irony.

“No, I–”

“Live a little, kid. I’m coming.” The call clicked out.

Fuck.

“Alright, big problem, guys. Boss man’s on his way over, and he’s only five minutes out.”

“Oh,” Jim said, frowning, then quickly regained a smile. “I guess we’ll have to wrap this up quick then.”

“Wait, you’re not listening to me.”

“Rough fuck,” Cherie said, “then double-facial?”

“Jim, Cherie…”

“Right on,” Jim and Cherie said simultaneously and high-fived each other.

“Guys.”

“Derrick,” Cherie said. “It’d be a sin for me to leave you unsatisfied after working you up so much. Ever cum on a girl’s face?”

“No, wait what?” I held my head and shut my eyes tight. “Didn’t you guys… my boss is coming.”

“And you will be too,” Cherie said, licking her top lip. “Pound me, let me know when you’re gonna cum, and I’ll wait for it like a good girl.” She resumed her position, this instance, spreading her cheeks.

“Goddammit.” I stroked myself toward her crack until I was past one hundred percent and shoved my prick inside her snatch.

“Not much time, so we gotta up the ante here,” Jim said and then looked down at his wife, balling up handfuls of hair. “You ready?”

“For any fucking thing,” she said with a breathy tone. “Use me.”

Jim nodded at me and then thrust into her fiercely, bouncing her skull off his cock. She released her glutes, and they trembled uncontrollably in front of me as I slammed her with a pent-up frustration that exceeded my expectations. The sloshy throat sounds, combined with the applause of her meaty buttocks, meant the end was quickly approaching.

“Derrick!” said a voice from the outside I did not want to hear since I was about to bust one of the best nuts in my life.

“Shit,” I whispered, “it’s him.” We rushed to pack our clothes on as he shouted for me repeatedly.

“Don’t know what you’re doing, but I left my keys in the car. Rushed out with one set when it’s the other.  No worries, I’ll walk down the street and get them.”

“Bought some time,” Cherie said, throwing her garments aside and kneeling. “Hurry up and cover me. I’ve fucking earned it.”

The panic, fused with arousal, sent me into sensory overload as Jim and I stood on either side of Cherie. No doubt she probably felt like a goddess, about to be blessed by men masturbating with the intensity of bobbing woodpeckers.

Jim dropped his load onto Cherie while breathing heavily. Her palms lay flat on the floor between her wide-spread thighs from straight, extended arms. The delightful arch in her spine gave us guys a great view of her rear and plumped cleavage formed by her biceps. Light, near translucent ribbons decorated her nose, cheeks, lips and chin. Cherie turned to me and begged vociferously for my cum, while her husband’s dripped from her chin and jawline.

“Empty those fucking balls all over me before he gets back,” she said. “Hurry up and fucking do it.” She tilted her features up and opened her mouth while staring at me. I caged a deep, lengthy growl and grunts within my diaphragm as thick, frosting stripes of cum slapped her forehead, hair and one eye socket.  Some trickled down her cheeks and along the side of her nose, and over her lips, into her maw.

“Graaah,” was all I could manage from my in-orgasm Neanderthal brain as droplets fell onto her slutty canvas, but the instant switch to Homo Sapiens triggered when my boss’s voice sounded from the outside, and his keys jangled.

“Too many goddamn keys,” he said laughingly. “Gimme a sec, bud.”

“Fuck.” I nearly tripped, trying to throw my pants on and left the lovebirds getting dressed as I exited, looking almost normal again. The realization that I didn’t wipe my privates of Cherie’s juices and the resulting moisture on my thigh and underwear was equal parts thrilling and unamusing.

“Alright, got it,” my boss said, and he unlocked and entered in sync with my emergence into the main shopping area.

“Jesus, didn’t you hear me out here?”

“Sorry, I would’ve opened for you, but I was taking care of some business.” I pointed my thumb over my shoulder toward the bathroom.

“Christ, kid, I warned you about those tacos from down the street.” He traipsed behind the counter. “Makes sense since you had the sign up.”

I gave him a close-mouthed smile as he prattled on about his day and how sorry he was for inconveniencing me. The temptation to boisterously agree nearly pulled itself over the precipice of my impatience, but luckily, the horny couple emerged from the back.

“This dress is just lovely,” Cherie said, now sporting large-framed sunglasses and a scarf tied around her head, covering her hairline. I held in my snicker given the reason she hid under the garment. “We’ll take it.”

“Derrick,” my superior leaned in and whispered, “I didn’t know you had customers.”

I laughed nervously and shrugged in a barely visible way.

“And you took lunch while they were here,” he continued, trying to utter it softly through his teeth.

“Oh, don’t be too hard on him,” Jim said, obviously following our conversation. “We were taking so long and being so indecisive, we told him to eat something before he dropped.”

“Such a nice young man you have working for you,” Cherie said. “I hope he’s not in any trouble.”

My boss stood dumbfounded and with a quickly formed smile replied, “No-no, of course not. He helped you guys out, and that’s all that matters.”

Everyone engaged in meaningless chatter for the next few minutes, which I thought laughable because that’s what you’re supposed to do before having sex with a woman while her husband watches.  Least, that’s what I’ve heard. 

Just as they were about to leave, the door opened to reveal a beautiful, lithe, dark-skinned woman and a man who exceeded even Jim’s superhero-esque height and musculature.

“Trina,” my boss said, “what the hell are you doing here?”

“Heey, everyone,” she said, waving at us and the married couple, who postponed their exit. “Just thought I’d drop in for a bit and tell you things worked out. My boyfriend’s mom had a little situation this morning that had to get sorted, but thankfully, it didn’t take as long as we thought it would. Derrick…” she lightly touched my forearm, “… sorry for messing up your off-day plans. I owe you one.”

“Ah, it’s nothing.” My attempt at a grin needed an infusion of enthusiasm as I up nodded at her boyfriend who responded in kind. Being a guy, I figured he picked up on how I felt about his girl from just observing my body language and speech for the sixty seconds he stood there. The look he gave me spoke pity, which was probably in my mind and the last thing I needed.

“I offered him the rest of the day off,” my boss spoke, “but he insisted on finishing up here.”

“And you know what.” I swiveled toward him. “I think I’ll take you up on that offer.” I approached the couple who decided to stay, and by reading their facial expressions, they connected what I told them with what just unfolded.

“If we’re all headed in the same direction,” Jim said, “maybe you could show us around a bit.”

“Yeah,” Cherie jumped in. “We’re only in town for a few days anyway. Give us an idea of what locals do for fun.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea,” I said and approached my customers, patting their shoulders while standing in the middle. I then looked over at my co-workers, avoided the boyfriend’s woeful gaze, and waved my goodbyes as I exited with my new acquaintances. Besides the noises of traffic and the occasional loudmouths, the three of us padded along the sidewalk for a few minutes before any words were spoken.

“I’m guessing her having a boyfriend is news to you, huh?” Jim said in a lowered tone.

“Yup.” I strolled with my hands in my pockets.

“Oh, honey.” Cherie hugged me from the side and laid her head on my shoulder as we continued on.

Jim lightly bumped his fist against my upper arm and said, “You’ll look back at this a few years from now and laugh about it, but it’s gonna suck right now.”

“Yeah,” I said.

“I know sex doesn’t solve everything,” Cherie said, lifting her head off my shoulder and looking at me, “but we’re linking up with a friend of ours who we were planning to have some fun with. Think you’ll love her. She’s hot. Petite little thing.”

“Great ass.” Jim spread his hands in front of him and grabbed phantom buns.

A subtle grin stretched one corner of my mouth, and I said, “Screw it, why not.”

The duo cheered raucously, and I just climbed out of a pit of quicksand. As Cherie said, sex doesn’t solve everything, but all things considered, I wasn’t even penciled in for work that day. Fate may not be real, but the opportunity was, and my determination directed me to make the most of it.