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Project Semi Colon: Lush Style

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Kiera
Short Arse Brit
Quote by Burquette
It breaks my heart. I heard of project Semi Colon here on Lush and I think it's the most wonderful thing, my brother and grandfather both being victims of suicide.

The founder of this project, Amy Bleuel, has died at age 31. She lost her battle with depression.


Thank you for letting us know. This is so sad. I'm so sorry she lost her battle, I hope she is at peace now. I will remember her forever and how much this thread inspired by her by Rachel has helped us all.

Hi Ms B
The Duchess of Tart

Please check out my new story, co-written with the amazing Wilful.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/long-time-coming.aspx

And my latest poem, The Temptation.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/the-temptation.aspx
patokl
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Burquette
It breaks my heart. I heard of project Semi Colon here on Lush and I think it's the most wonderful thing, my brother and grandfather both being victims of suicide.

The founder of this project, Amy Bleuel, has died at age 31. She lost her battle with depression.
I just learned this. We all hope that that semicolon, that pause, will become a full stop one day. Amy Bleuel couldn't t, but she did inspire this thread, and with that she, through Rachel, gave us a place to come to, were it's safe, and where there's always warmth and support.
Amy, rest in peace.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.

Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Guest
Lurker
That is so sad. I hope she found her peace somehow.



Unknown User
Am not coping at the moment. This is when I started falling apart last year and instead of realising that this year is different, I am holding on to what I seem to perceive is bound to go wrong. I am so paralysed and can't seem to snap the fuck out of it.
Unknown User
Quote by Regnadkcin
Please wish me luck.


Little late on the luck but I hope it was and has been successful for you...

ETA helps if I read the damn dates on the post, didn't realise I wasn't on the last page.

Unknown User
Quote by Burquette
It breaks my heart. I heard of project Semi Colon here on Lush and I think it's the most wonderful thing, my brother and grandfather both being victims of suicide.

The founder of this project, Amy Bleuel, has died at age 31. She lost her battle with depression.


That is awfully upsetting. I will be so eternally grateful for the community spirit she has inspired behind the message. This thread, my semicolon, remembering what it denotes to me has ben so trnasitional in ways I can't begin to describe.
TonyaL
Snake Charmera
Quote by sweetsinner
Am not coping at the moment. This is when I started falling apart last year and instead of realising that this year is different, I am holding on to what I seem to perceive is bound to go wrong. I am so paralysed and can't seem to snap the fuck out of it.


Sinner,
I'm not sure what you are going through but if you need to talk I'm a good listener. I wish I had words to make you feel better. From what I've seen you are an amazing strong woman. I know it's hard to see that from within I never do but I'm sure many people here will tell you the same.

My Anti-Valentine Entry 💔

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/cheating/a-valentines-date-to-remember

My first EP and a top ten from the Pride Competition
https://www.lushstories.com/stories/lesbian/-love-is-love-.aspx

Hanging in the background but around
patokl
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by sweetsinner
Am not coping at the moment. This is when I started falling apart last year and instead of realising that this year is different, I am holding on to what I seem to perceive is bound to go wrong. I am so paralysed and can't seem to snap the fuck out of it.
Hang in there my friend. What could be doesn't have to be. You said it yourself, this year is a different year, a whole new one, with new chances and possibilities.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.

Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Kiera
Short Arse Brit
Quote by sweetsinner
Am not coping at the moment. This is when I started falling apart last year and instead of realising that this year is different, I am holding on to what I seem to perceive is bound to go wrong. I am so paralysed and can't seem to snap the fuck out of it.


I get where you are at, been there, done that still feel that way often. That feeling of dread can be so paralysing, not knowing when it's going to strike, but it's a dark cloud over your head following you everywhere. That's how it feels when I get like that, or the best way I can describe it.

It's a negative, and I never need any help when it comes to feeling negative and not good enough. My therapist who I was very lucky with because he was very good and really nice worked very hard with me for a long time to help change my way of thinking and most importantly not to focus on negatives. Another thing was (bare in mind this was years of therapy, and he worded it all much better) not to let outside influences (at the time this was my first husband who was a monster and his family) change my way of thinking. They were constantly doing things it seemed for kicks just to drag me the fuck back down and keep me in that state. Bottom line is my therapist said (more kindly than this mind) that it was ultimately my fault, I was giving them that power by giving them a reaction, he said if I can stop that then it will stop, and it did, well it certainly improved a hell of a lot from the daily shit they used to give me.

Shit, I have to go, I've got to go to bloody London...dark cloud, dark cloud, I bloody hate going to London lol.

It's not an easy process and doesn't always work and what works for one doesn't work for all. You have been through so much, and you are strong, even though you don't feel like that right now. Take one day at a time, avoid negative people they won't help you, on a place like this ripe with drama it's not easy to avoid that let alone real life. Talk to us too; we are here for you. The amount of times by way of example either Rachel or me have been feeling like that and not feel like talking, but we send that one bb and no matter which of us is down in the dumps at the time we both end up in better spirits. We have long length totally serious conversations about becoming fairies and home improvements for our Castle in Spain, we have a tortoise and everything, his name is Neville. We both want to become Hobbits too but we don;t have hairy feet.

You get what I mean, though, right? Sometimes you just need that break from reality and the smile that goes with it. Talk to us, we love you and are here for you.

I've got to go but I will be about later if you need to talk. *runs out the door*
The Duchess of Tart

Please check out my new story, co-written with the amazing Wilful.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/straight-sex/long-time-coming.aspx

And my latest poem, The Temptation.

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/the-temptation.aspx
Gillianleeeza
Normal Adjacent
Quote by Burquette


The founder of this project, Amy Bleuel, has died at age 31. She lost her battle with depression.


This breaks my heart too. Coming from a family who struggles with mental health issues, this just hurts. If someone who was doing so much good and getting support can still lose the fight, anyone can. It makes me even more worried about my son, myself and others.

This thread though gives me hope, people talking openly about these issues is one of the best things anyone can do.

TALK about it and get it out and keep it out, in the open. Keeping quiet just keeps the stigma and negative stereotypes going.

Support and talking are good steps in the right direction.

I hope everyone is doing the best they can today and everyday.
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by sweetsinner
Am not coping at the moment. This is when I started falling apart last year and instead of realising that this year is different, I am holding on to what I seem to perceive is bound to go wrong. I am so paralysed and can't seem to snap the fuck out of it.


SS,

I feel for you. A mental / emotional attitude is difficult to break. My attitude towards this is to try and break things into smaller pieces and change routines.

Last year's news really depressed me. And while I haven't fully cleared that from my psyche, I tried to eliminate all daily reminders of this. I stopped reading the news. I refused to discuss politics. I blocked or avoided people who raised my ire. I redoubled my connection to those I cared for. While this change of routine wasn't a cureall, it left space for better, more positive things to creep in. To be completely transparent, it was more difficult to employ this in my more personal arrangements. My relationship with my spouse is strained and a work in progress still.

The smaller pieces bit, was finding small things that gave me some semblance of pleasure. Cooking, walking my dog, coffee with a friend, etc. gave me some solace against the context of, people are stupid and wrong headed." I still have that cynacism, but it seems a little less depresing and debilitating right now.

My solution may not be what works for you but I want to offer what I found helpful. I wish you the best on getting out of this "funk." "Funk" seems to understate and trivialize the problem, but I cannot find a single term that does justice to the difficulty of this journey. We are there for you.

Regnadkcin
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Regnadkcin
I return to work today after being on medical leave for eight months now and really need the salary. I have had anxiety dreams about work for the last three nights, but still in look foreward to seeing my colleagues.

Please wish me luck.

My body is still immune supressed, so I will take precautions to avoid catching everything in the petrie dish we call the world. I bought new pants (trousers) as my old ones are still too big. My hair has grown out for a year and a half now, I wonder how people will react to that and my changed appearance.


I have returned to work for the last two weeks. I work half days and will start three quarter days next week. I lost a little weight and struggle with fatigue, but it was largely successful.

However, on the third day back, it was announced that the function I run would be relocated to another state. I was offered an early retirement package effective in two years. It is a pretty generous package. I am not sure how I feel about this. I have been doing this for twenty years and have been greatly successful. Two years ago, this probably would have been devastating as I viewed my profession as who I was. With my cancer, I don't quite see myself the same way today. Maybe it hasn't hit me fully yet.

I am not sleeping well and seem to be processing this change. It is a chance for a new start but older problems still exist. I don't get what I want and need from my long term relationship. But divorce would mean I couldn't retire and would need to work for another ten years. I also worry about caring for my aging parents. If I continued to work in my profession, I would need to relocate and to a less liberal state. This is all a bit depressing and challenging. I do feel a bit trapped.

Still, I am in a better place than three months ago. Thank you all for the good thoughts and concern.

Regnadkcin
Guest
Lurker
Quote by kiera
Edit. Changed my mind about the post.

Hope you're all doing ok xo


I'm here for you. I'm sorry I didn't respond until now.

You're allowed to feel anyway you feel.

I don't know if I could make you feel better, but I'll always listen as long as you need to.
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by kiera
Edit. Changed my mind about the post.

Hope you're all doing ok xo


You have the right to feel the way you feel. Please take care of yourself.

We care!
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
I am hurting for my best friend. She is taking her son to visit colleges. Her son's friend was also visiting but took a small plane up. The plane crashed killing all on board. She is hurting right now and there is little I can do for her. I hate feeling this powerless.

My friend kept me alive over the last three months. I literally owe her my life. Now, when I can't help except through text and phone, I feel inadequate.
patokl
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Regnadkcin
I am hurting for my best friend. She is taking her son to visit colleges. Her son's friend was also visiting but took a small plane up. The plane crashed killing all on board. She is hurting right now and there is little I can do for her. I hate feeling this powerless.

My friend kept me alive over the last three months. I literally owe her my life. Now, when I can't help except through text and phone, I feel inadequate.
I'm sure of this: She knows how much you care, and she feels the support you give, even if you're not physically with her.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.

Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
All of us go through good days and bad days. I really thought I was on a long-term upward swing recently (recovery progressing, more energy, back to work) and then, wham, darkness intrudes again.

Last weekend was very tough. Pre-migraine, insomnia, forced early retirement (while developing training for my replacement), bruised feelings at work with everyone asking me to "fix it", and the slow motion observation of my relationship ending all fighting for space in my small head. My best friend is struggling with her own challenges, so I couldn't go where I sought perspective in the past. I could only offer my small solace. Distraction was my friend. The kitchen has been deep cleaned and all the laundry is done, folded and put away.

I seemed to have gotten through it with some help from a couple Lushies. Sometimes just a note is enough...

If I irritated you when I was in my dark space, I am sorry.
patokl
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by Regnadkcin
...
If I irritated you when I was in my dark space, I am sorry.

All I can do (I often wish it was more) is say: I hear you, and I listen. And, no you didn't irritate.
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.

Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i
Regnadkcin
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by MostPreciousLittle


Thank you for this. I've been having some really bad days lately. It reached a crisis today. Your message really helped. Thank you.

Been through hell. I don't recommend the place.
Guest
Lurker
Quote by Regnadkcin


Thank you for this. I've been having some really bad days lately. It reached a crisis today. Your message really helped. Thank you.

Been through hell. I don't recommend the place.


You're welcome. I am glad that it helped you.
patokl
Active Ink Slinger
Sorry, posted in the wrong thread
A little kindness can be so valuable, yet costs almost nothing

In many countries being gay is a crime, and even in modern societies, politicians try to legalise discrimination. Your voice can make a difference. Have a look at All Out to find out how.

Hey... pssst.... that's an l (as in luscious) at the end of my name, not an i