Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
This is brilliant actually, perfect for that next game of Naked Twister...heck, wish I thought of this one...
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DirtyMartini
Over 90 days ago
Male, 64
United States
Forum
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by nicola
I'd prefer it in British Racing Green please.
Oh damn...it appears we're all out of Astons...
I think we might have some bicycles left though...let me check in the back...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Oh damn...I'm not even close here...
I might have to think of something really cheap and shameless to promote myself...hmmm...
I might have to think of something really cheap and shameless to promote myself...hmmm...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
New Aston Martin convertible to the next person who clicks on my profile page...
Profile Page - DirtyMartini
http://www.lushstories.com/dirtymartini
Hurry...supplies may be extremely limited...offer may not be valid in your area...see my page for details...
Profile Page - DirtyMartini
http://www.lushstories.com/dirtymartini
Hurry...supplies may be extremely limited...offer may not be valid in your area...see my page for details...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Fugs
Is this the one?
Oh yeah...you done good Miss Fugs...
Now excuse me while I go add a couple of thousand friends...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Reminds me of a story that happened to me a long time ago here on Lush...I met this female member in a rather hot chat session, the details of which I won't get into at the moment...anyway, she started sending me really hot pictures, which of course only piqued my interest...
I found out later through sources I'd rather not reveal that was actually a real dog...no, I mean a real dog...
So yes...be careful out there...just sayin'...
I found out later through sources I'd rather not reveal that was actually a real dog...no, I mean a real dog...
So yes...be careful out there...just sayin'...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Something tells me that if you look up the word "Fail" in the dictionary there just might be a picture like this...
Just saying...
Just saying...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Good Evening Lushkins...that is most certainly some fascinating trivia there Reverend...
How about some Rumplebations trivia...I would say that at least 9 out of 10 of those fancy bottles on the top shelf contain some form of Sams Club no-frills liquor...and 99 out of the last 100 coffees Busty made scored less than 2% on the Drinkablility scale...
Oh, and Coma and Tose are blitzed 100% of the time...
So...what sort of Super Bowl drink specials we running here tonight? Anything I can afford?
Cheers,
Alan.
How about some Rumplebations trivia...I would say that at least 9 out of 10 of those fancy bottles on the top shelf contain some form of Sams Club no-frills liquor...and 99 out of the last 100 coffees Busty made scored less than 2% on the Drinkablility scale...
Oh, and Coma and Tose are blitzed 100% of the time...
So...what sort of Super Bowl drink specials we running here tonight? Anything I can afford?
Cheers,
Alan.
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Fugs
3. Ask anyone and everyone to be your friend - They will go to your profile to see who you are before accepting.
Just curious...is there an application to send out 103,000 friend requests at once? Hmmm...let me see if I still remember my programming skills...
And be careful about drawing too much attention to yourself...it could have its hazards...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Good Evening My Blessed Lushkin Friends...that was a lovely and blessed sermon most perfect for this here most blessed of sanctimoniously pious religious holidays, otherwise known as Super Bowl Sunday...I see your divinely inspired words Reverend did indeed work well, as the, um, New Jersey Giants did indeed win...
Anyway...did I happen to mention that we are once again out of communion wine?
Where is this big Super Bowl party I here of? Anything left in that tequila bottle besides a drunk worm? What's going on here?
I be back...nice to see y'all...
Cheers,
Alan.
Anyway...did I happen to mention that we are once again out of communion wine?
Where is this big Super Bowl party I here of? Anything left in that tequila bottle besides a drunk worm? What's going on here?
I be back...nice to see y'all...
Cheers,
Alan.
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Spriteness
yes, but it only goes up one no matter HOW often you view it, so don't just start clicking on it over and over LOL
Oh damn...you mean I been sitting here clicking all my stories the last two years for nothing?
How about my profile page views? Maybe you can help me out there by clicking on mine, a few thousand times...let me know when you're done...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by GypsyChild
Sorry to be a grammar Nazi, but it should be" how to write well".
Damn, another grammar Nazi named Gypsy...I mean, like, what are the odds?
Just saying...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
I am sooo loving this idea...I can hide out in my own living room...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Oh yeah...I think I'm getting flashbacks...Donovan...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
OK, maybe not...but I could use one of these...Super Size it, will ya?
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by NightFox
I Command you all to NOT look at my page!
Oh damn...that is slick, why didn't I think of that one?
Btw, giving out free lattes to the next person to click on my page...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Confucius say, "If you are in a book store and cannot find the book for which you search, you are obviously in the.....
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
I had mentioned a couple weeks back about how my 9-11 poem was plagiarized and submitted to a church bulletin...I wrote Pastor Tim Goodman, and he put this out in the current February edition of the bulletin...very nice, and touching btw...
Here is an excerpt...it's on page seven of the bulletin, me thinks...
It has recently come to our attention that a poem commemorating 9/11 was published in our October newsletter that was incorrectly credited in terms of authorship. We sincerely apologize to the author, Mr. Alan Jankowski, who published this poem We Shall Never Forget as a tribute to those affected by the tragedy of 9/11. It was originally published in our newsletter with the intention of bringing more healing to those who are still hurting and comfort to those who are still grieving. It is a true blessing that there are individuals like Mr. Jankowski who are gifted in writing and we thank the author for sharing his gift with the world. For all of you who enjoyed the poem and were encouraged by its words, here it is again in its entirety. May we together continue to seek to participate in Jesus’ ministry of healing and reconciliation for anyone who suffers.
The Creekside Connection - The Newsletter of the Creekside United Methodist Church
http://www.creeksideumc.com/yahoo_site_admin/assets/docs/Creekside_Connection_Feb_2012.27202656.pdf
Here is an excerpt...it's on page seven of the bulletin, me thinks...
Corrigendum
It has recently come to our attention that a poem commemorating 9/11 was published in our October newsletter that was incorrectly credited in terms of authorship. We sincerely apologize to the author, Mr. Alan Jankowski, who published this poem We Shall Never Forget as a tribute to those affected by the tragedy of 9/11. It was originally published in our newsletter with the intention of bringing more healing to those who are still hurting and comfort to those who are still grieving. It is a true blessing that there are individuals like Mr. Jankowski who are gifted in writing and we thank the author for sharing his gift with the world. For all of you who enjoyed the poem and were encouraged by its words, here it is again in its entirety. May we together continue to seek to participate in Jesus’ ministry of healing and reconciliation for anyone who suffers.
The Creekside Connection - The Newsletter of the Creekside United Methodist Church
http://www.creeksideumc.com/yahoo_site_admin/assets/docs/Creekside_Connection_Feb_2012.27202656.pdf
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Of course there is always Facebook and Twitter, and probably millions of other places on the net where you can post links to your story...
Most people don't go to that much effort unless they're actually selling something...for example, two of my stories here on Lush are coming out in an anthology on e-book soon...I'll promote that when it comes out, otherwise I won't really bother...
Just saying...
Most people don't go to that much effort unless they're actually selling something...for example, two of my stories here on Lush are coming out in an anthology on e-book soon...I'll promote that when it comes out, otherwise I won't really bother...
Just saying...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Wow...I just want to say Dude...I am impressed...nice work...
Btw...is that list just from this year, or all of Lushtime?
Btw...is that list just from this year, or all of Lushtime?
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Happy Birthday Ashleigh Doll...
I was going to post some naked pictures of myself here...but, for that you're going to have to go visit my profile page later...
In the meantime...
Cheers,
Alan.
I was going to post some naked pictures of myself here...but, for that you're going to have to go visit my profile page later...
In the meantime...
Cheers,
Alan.
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Mini Liking Spriteness
i like them - they are cute. ah, and what WWM said.
You know I used to think Minis were pretty cool...then I found out Sprite likes them...
Now I'm not so sure...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Miss Evil Vengeful Spriteness
fine, i'll just have to post them on my page then - and here i was trying to help you out.
Hmmm...you know, I'd really like to help you out too...
Which way did you come in again?
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Good Evening my fellow Lushketeer Friends...Oh Miss Jenni, it is so wonderful to see you again...and did I mention how hot you're looking lately?
Did you just happen to mention that you were buying drinks? Well, well, well...just so happens that I happen to be thirsty...what a coincidence that be...
What did you say you want to talk about again? Just remind me a couple of times if I forget...oh yeah, love...
Well, let me tell you...if you keep buying drinks, I just may fall deeply in love...beats the heck out of falling on my face like Tose just did when he tried to get up...
Anyway, um, yeah...love...I heard of that...pass me a drink and let me know what you want to know...
Hope everyone else be doing good around here...nice to see you all, Chef, Holly, Lady S, Al, and of course the most Righteous Reverend East or West of the Mississippi...
Btw, I heard a rumor about some contest going on here...something about viewing a profile...
Just to refresh my memory...what is a profile again? Is that like this link?
http://www.lushstories.com/dirtymartini
Just making sure I got it right...
Cheers,
Alan.
Did you just happen to mention that you were buying drinks? Well, well, well...just so happens that I happen to be thirsty...what a coincidence that be...
What did you say you want to talk about again? Just remind me a couple of times if I forget...oh yeah, love...
Well, let me tell you...if you keep buying drinks, I just may fall deeply in love...beats the heck out of falling on my face like Tose just did when he tried to get up...
Anyway, um, yeah...love...I heard of that...pass me a drink and let me know what you want to know...
Hope everyone else be doing good around here...nice to see you all, Chef, Holly, Lady S, Al, and of course the most Righteous Reverend East or West of the Mississippi...
Btw, I heard a rumor about some contest going on here...something about viewing a profile...
Just to refresh my memory...what is a profile again? Is that like this link?
http://www.lushstories.com/dirtymartini
Just making sure I got it right...
Cheers,
Alan.
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by Attention Whore Wannabe Spriteness
you think? lol - you're SO observant!
Nothing gets by me...you should know that by now...um, what you trying to say anyway?
And stop posting all those naked pictures of yourself all over my profile page, will ya? It's starting to get way too cluttered...I might have to start taking them down soon if it gets too bad...
Just sayin'
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by nicola
Is it going to be another stolen image from the porn site, watchmygf.com, to go with your fake ass made up career / profile?
If you had a little more intelligence about you, it would be more difficult to spot your new accounts. Tenacious as well as thick
LOL...I think she's trying to tell you something...
Just saying...
Purveyor of Poetry & Porn
Quote by nicola
Here are the Top 10 for January, for those that may need some pointers
Oh damn...I'm gonna have a little trouble competing here I see...
I might have to resort to some cheap and totally shameless self-promo techniques...
Just saying...