Twas the night before New Years,When all through the house, Not a creature was stirring,Not even my spouse. His clothes were all packed in a suitcase with care,And he and his bag were traveling on cheap airfare. The children were away sleeping at a friend's homestead,While visions of a sugar daddy danced in my head. So alone in the dark I lay for a nap,When at the front door I heard a loud rap. I sprang from the couch to...