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mercianknight
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 64
0 miles · Evesham
Forum
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We tried the KY "Yours & Mine". Seemed to work for wifey although do not expect the 'Wow' factor the commercials claim.
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Damn, I feel kinda dull with my www.bbc.com
Good footie news though.
Good footie news though.
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Oh darn! Not being part of the 'American Public' kinda excludes me. 
Hang on, my wife attended Uni in the States.... I'm sure that qualifies. I'll celebrate in ...er...I mean....on her, oh wait, that sounds worse.
Ah sod it, I'll just shag her
Hang on, my wife attended Uni in the States.... I'm sure that qualifies. I'll celebrate in ...er...I mean....on her, oh wait, that sounds worse.
Ah sod it, I'll just shag her
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......taking down her 'Fathead' poster of Larry the Cable Guy. Suitably prepared, she logged onto the the url given in the email and...........
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Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven.
Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in. The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.
Dolly takes off her top and says, 'Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.'
The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.
The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse and drinks it down.
Then,she pees into a toilet and pulls the lever.
The Angel says, 'OK, your Majesty, you may go in.'
Dolly is outraged and asks, 'What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She pees into a toilet and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?'
"Sorry, Dolly," says the Angel, "a Royal Flush beats a Pair, no matter how big they are."
Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in. The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.
Dolly takes off her top and says, 'Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.'
The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.
The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse and drinks it down.
Then,she pees into a toilet and pulls the lever.
The Angel says, 'OK, your Majesty, you may go in.'
Dolly is outraged and asks, 'What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She pees into a toilet and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?'
"Sorry, Dolly," says the Angel, "a Royal Flush beats a Pair, no matter how big they are."
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I know, I know, another guy poking his nose in the gals section, but......
She never asked, but I just stood in front of her one evening after dinner and slowly masturbated in front of her. I swear, she came without me touching her! She still talks about it, but has never asked me to repeat. Why?
She never asked, but I just stood in front of her one evening after dinner and slowly masturbated in front of her. I swear, she came without me touching her! She still talks about it, but has never asked me to repeat. Why?
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.....she needed to switch her web-cam on, resplendent in "Madonna-esque" basque with tassles. Second.....
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......machines are never as good as the real thing and in her heart still yearned for her Mercian Knight to slip on that kilt and have a fling with her. She rushed to her computer, logged on to her e-mail account and positively glowed when she saw......
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Erm, pardon me, but isn't this kinda how the movie 2012 started?
Should I pack my bags and head for the Himalayas now?
Should I pack my bags and head for the Himalayas now?
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The problem with these kinds of stats is always the timing.
Right now, with the Barclays Premier League & UEFA Champions League on the telly, you will be hard pressed to drag my sorry ass away from a live game. Otherwise, I tend to agree with the ladies so far as, apart from Top Gear, there's not a lot to watch on the telly.
I will add the caveat, however, that I do limit my TV and on-line time in line with the restrictions I place on my daughter as I am old school in my belief that you need to be up and out to meet real friends and be ACTIVE. So, TV and on-line time is really 'down time' in our house.
**piously pushes keyboard away with an overinflated aura of self-importance**
Right now, with the Barclays Premier League & UEFA Champions League on the telly, you will be hard pressed to drag my sorry ass away from a live game. Otherwise, I tend to agree with the ladies so far as, apart from Top Gear, there's not a lot to watch on the telly.
I will add the caveat, however, that I do limit my TV and on-line time in line with the restrictions I place on my daughter as I am old school in my belief that you need to be up and out to meet real friends and be ACTIVE. So, TV and on-line time is really 'down time' in our house.
**piously pushes keyboard away with an overinflated aura of self-importance**
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......slapped the cyborg upside his head and (disappointedly?) pointed to the 115volt socket telling the cyborg, "That's where you re-charge, you donkey!" He staggered out of the room leaving the cyborg, a throbbing mass of flesh and machine, recharging on the floor when Gypsy entered from the side door and, mouth agape, approached the man-machine and......
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...pulled out his squeegy and began to clean the windows, cursing the way his chores kept him from logging into his Lush account. As he moved around the house ready to clean the sliding glass doors, he saw....
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.... Gypsy because of her renowned silver tongue and her collection of 'Strap ons'. Turning her back forever on Tarzan, she pulled out her iphone and dialled....
