The One Hello. My name is Dean. In 1983, I was a typical 16 year old kid living near a small town in Minnesota on a farm, standing 5’ 7”, weighing about 150 pounds. I had a farmer’s tan from working on the family farm baling hay and working for all the neighbors helping them out trying to make some money to buy my first car. Anyways, it was a Friday evening in July. The sun was going down, turning everything beautiful sha...

I Don’t Want To Know I had just finished my work at the store and was walking out to the parking lot where my car was parked. The first cigarette in four hours tasted damned good; these twelve hour days were pretty rough. A female voice came to my ears from out of the darkness. “You got one of those you could spare?” I pulled out my pack and my lighter and held them out. A hand reached out and took them from my hand. She...

A Good Kind of Trouble I was driving north on Interstate 35 as fast as the governor on the blue Mack would let me, the 8 inch dual open exhaust pipes snarling with the Cummins powered song in my ears as I crossed the south Texas prairie land trying to make San Antonio to stop for the night. The air conditioner was doing its best to keep me cool in the 100 plus degree late July evening, and failing at its task. I’m John Mu...

It was a beautiful Midwest fall day. The sky was a deep blue, a deeper blue than usual. There was a chill in the air, a hint of the coming winter. The fall leaves were brilliant with their reds and oranges. Once upon a time, it used to be my favorite time of the year, but that had come to a crashing halt long ago. I unlocked the door to my apartment and went inside, tired from a long week at work. I didn’t mind the job I...

I walked alone in the darkness My heart was cold and filled with sadness Anger and despair were my only companions Love had left me hurt and alone The pain was a weight like a stone I carried my burden in silence For no one would care to hear my prayer I prayed before sleep every night That someday there would be light I made so many mistakes in the past Thought I found love, but it would never last The sun would always t...

I used to think Darkness was my friend. Because it would Hide the scars. The scars On my heart, The scars On my soul. The darkness was my friend. But I could not see All the damage I was doing to me. All the anger, All the pain. Nothing but clouds, Nothing but rain. It would cut even deeper, Cause even more pain. So I built a wall Strong and tall. To keep everything out, And protect from all. But one day The sun came out...

I Lied I lied to myself once, Told myself “I don’t need love.” I lied to myself again. Told myself, “I am fine.” Once more I lied to myself. Told myself, “I am strong.” I lied to myself another time. Told myself, “I don’t need anybody.” But the lies Came back to haunt me. I was not Fine. I was not Strong. I do need Love. I do need Somebody. I need You. I need your Love. To make me strong. To make me fine. To make me whole...

It was 7:30 on a Monday evening in May. I had just finished my last class of the semester at the community college. At 42, I was going back to school to learn a new career being unemployed during this economic downturn. I had to stop at Wal-Mart to pick up a couple of things for my supper that evening. I don’t know why I decided to stop at this particular Wal-Mart instead of the one in my hometown twenty miles away, but I...