Kids tucked in bed, I hear my wife humming “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" as we wrap the presents.

A quiet knock on the front door.

Some guy in a Santa suit?

She grins a thousand watts.

“Merry Christmas, honey. This is Alan.”

Oh.

She met Alan online for a potential threesome.

She starts kissing him.

Fun to watch, but it goes on for a while. I clear my throat.

“Sorry, got carried away there,” he says, turning to me.

I hope the kids aren't seeing Mommy and Daddy kissing Santa Claus.