Quote by lynnwitt

In the queue!

And on the map!

My latest story, The Fockit, or, In and Out Again, contains the following inimitable piece of love-talk:

“YEAH FUUUUCK!!! FUCKIN’ COMING, BABE. SQUIRT YER FUCKIN’ JIZZ ALL OVER ME FUCKIN’ SLUT FACE – YEAAAAAHHHHH!!!"

Just saying... 😕

Quote by KimmiBeGood

I’ll hit it this week, Grusha! 😀

"Hit it"? Maybe just stroke it, Kimmi. Or give it a little kiss... 😉

"In a Hole in an Arse there lived a Fockit..." So begins my latest story, The Fockit, or, In and Out Again.

(N.B. This story has nothing to do with Alison, or smoking, or cursed cunts, or even opera-singing futas. No religious guilt, no dystopian futures, no social commentary - cunty-promise! It is pure comic relief - and it always good to be relieved, no?)

Bewildered? Have a read. And here's a map to help you on your way. Have fun exploring! 😜🤣😇

Quote by principessa
The rules for cover images at the top of stories are the same as those for avatars. No hardcore shots, closeups of genitals, or photos depicting insertion are permitted.

May I include an image which includes a stylised line drawing of female genitalia?

Quote by lynnwitt
This IS going to be about Arwen Evenstar, right? Now SHE'S an elf I'd like to... Well you have an idea. 😇

As to Arwen, Lynn, I sympathise entirely. But no, this story is going to be more hobbity than elven. But I am sure that good packages come in small packages. And I always liked the sound of Belladonna Took - didn't you?

Quote by lynnwitt

my artistic abilities consist generally of being able to spill paint.

Likewise! Well, it's good to know that others like my idea. But seemingly other Lushies are as unartistic as I am. Ah well...

With Young Cunts - Act Five, this saga, the "Silmarillion of Cunts" if you like, reaches its conclusion. Alison fans, beware - for in this act, as in the final chapter of Alison Goes to London, there is betrayal, tragedy, grief, love - as well as a whole load of filthy fucking. Two scenes, at opposite ends of the timeline, bookend Emma Jane Cuntslicker's history-making career as Principal of the Royal Academy of Fucking; her turbulent relationship with Hildegard Fotzenficker; and her final, bittersweet fuckship with Dr Richard Dick, perhaps the only person who ever truly loved her.

And so, who will you, in the final instance, agree with? Is it Cunts, who says, "See what a wonderful world! A fucking world, a world full of Pleasure, a world devoid of possessiveness or exploitation or jealousy"? Or is it Alison, who says, "Fuck loads. But love more"?

If you remember and love Cunts, Dick-Dick, Riley, Alison & Rob, and the other lovable fuckers of the original novel, don't miss this ambiquel. Really, you won't regret it...!

Hello. I am writing a story which requires a piece of artwork to be included, which I do not have the competence to draw myself. Basically, I am looking for an explicit "map" of the female external genitalia, but in a Tolkien The Hobbit map style, i.e. a bit like the example attached. We could discuss privately what needs to be included on the map (apart from cunt and asshole, naturally), including text (both English and Dwarvish?). But is there anyone here who is good at drawing and who fancies having a go at this? Please PM me - thanks! 😊

With Arise Ye Fuckers From Your Slumbers! - Act Four of Young Cunts, the history of the New Enlightenment reaches fever pitch. I warned this could get Dickensian, and this is truly a tale of two titties, er, cities. One city is exemplified in Cunts and Hildegard, celebrating the glorious election victory of the Fuckers Party, the triumph of Pleasure, and the advent of a free-fucking nation for all. The dark underbelly, however, is locked in the hidden stories of the downtrodden: Riley's parents Eddie and Olive, and Rob's & Eva's parents John and Rosie - do they have any future in this Brave New World, or is it time to flee?
But soft - whose tongue is this licking at Hildegard's cum-soaked cunt? "My name is Dolores. I belong to you now," she says - which name should strike terror into the hearts of all Alison fans. What will Cunts do now?

Remember Riley from Alison Goes to London - the schoolgirl piece of "proper posh totty" with the anal gape to end all anal gapes? Her origins have always been obscure - though we know her mother is a respectable "two-bit whore" who works at the gloryhole station on Maryleboner Road; and that she once had a father who "pissed off years ago", leaving her mother with some alimony money with which to GM their daughter's asshole. Now, in this central climactic act of Alison prequel Young Cunts, we find out how her parents met, and where this most lovely of anal sluts sprang from. You will be moved to laughter and tears, I promise - and possibly even the spilling of other bodily fluids. But whose side will you end up on? Young Cunts - Act Three: Bathsheba's Tits is up now.

Wait, "Bathsheba's tits" - what? Well, she was a temptress from outside the palace, falling for whom brought retribution, but eventual glory, to the King. And her son wrote great poems about tits, didn't he? Read on to find out more...

A good question indeed, and one that is answered in glorious detail in Young Cunts - Act Two. Inevitably, therefore, the focus in this act begins to shift (temporarily, I assure you) from Emma Jane Cuntslicker onto Riley Throstlethwaite-Eccles who, as all Alison fans will know, is the consummate rectal-inserter of all things culinary, British, and chav. It is 2060, though: ten years after Alison, and Riley is no longer a schoolgirl anal ingénue, but a highly respected lecturer, Professor of Prolapse at the Royal Academy of Fucking, and respectably married to her big-dicked teenage sweetcunt Gaz.

But when a mysterious stranger appears, Riley's comfortable academic existence (exemplified by her twin mutually assfucking futa post-grad colleagues Yumiko and Fumiko) is disrupted. Who is this strange man in a grey three-piece suit, and what does he want of her?

None of that bothers Cunts, of course, who is adamant, despite her colleague Dick-Dick's remonstrations, that "this is what it's all about. Fucking. Pleasure." For, as she believes to the bottom of her heart, nothing else matters.

Reader - does it?

Quote by KimmiBeGood

He’s baaaaaaacckk!

Oh, Grusha, you are a unique talent! I highly recommend that the Alison fans read your offshoots! The fucktastic filthy fuckery continues!

Kimmi, so glad you are still an Alison fan! And you may do anything you like with my, er... "offshoot"... though I've never heard it called that before... 😉
(Fancy an "offshoot"-pic, Kimmi? 😜)

"Shall we start with Cunts?" suggests 80-year-old Alison Bates, when asked, "Tell me more about those times, Grandma Alison." It is of course a very good place to start, for Professor Emma Jane Cuntslicker ("Cunts" to her friends) of the Royal Academy of Fucking was not just, as my friend Violet puts it, the "best professor ever ❤", but one of the great founding fuckers of the New Enlightenment, a woman who managed to balance her devotion to building a free-fucking society with nobility of character and goodwill towards all her young charges. But where did this great woman come from? How did she help to create this brave new world? And just what was her enigmatic relationship with her eventual nemesis, Dr Hildegard Fotzenficker of the sinister Princess Asshole Hospice?

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times," writes Cunts later in life - and so this Alison Goes to London ambiquel has somewhat Dickensian (over-)ambitions, tracing a path through the history of the New Enlightenment, backwards and forwards from Alison, interweaving the stories of some of the people who were most deeply affected by this revolutionary movement: not just Cunts and Hildegard, but Riley and her elusive parents (What really happened to her dad?), Rob and Eva and their exiled family (How did that happen?), and of course Alison (What happened after she escaped?)

Young Cunts - Act One: Shall We Start With Cunts? is up now - the first of five. (OK, I have Shakespearian ambitions too - but have patience!)

Oh and, by the way, it's really filthy too... 😕

It is nearly four years since I started publishing my novel Alison Goes to London here on Lush - all about young Alison Bates travelling to the big city to study at the Royal Academy of Fucking, and what ensues thereafter. Opinion was divided on the merits of the work. Some Very Important People called it "hyperbolic… insecure", "vulgar", "disgusting” and "not erotic in the slightest.” But those who actually read the novel called it:

“the coolest erotic story/series I’ve ever read… I kinda feel like I did when I finished Parks and Recreation or Friends… a masterpiece from top to bottom.” (CarltonStJames)

“a truly delectable read… beautiful… just keeps getting better and better… You, my friend, are an excellent author!” (El_Henke)

“one of the most original, exhilarating and facetious pieces of writing I’ve read in a long time! … Thank you so much for such a fucktastic saga, through and through!” (AvidlyCurious)

“tremendously well-written… Bravo… consider me sold.” (Jaymal)

“Fucking! Absolutely fucking! The whole novel, of course…” (StarBelliedBoy)

There were several requests for follow-ups. The most frequent one was, "What happened next to Alison, Claire and Bradley?" - which question I answered in my Christmas special Claire's Cunt Kitchen. But then there was another flurry of questions, not just "What happened after that?" (i.e. another sequel, please), but also "How did this all begin?" (i.e. a prequel). Not one to shirk a challenge, I have spent the past year writing an Alison "ambiquel" (prequel plus sequel combined 😉) - concentrating on the origins, as well the later life, of some of your favourite Alison characters: the utterly inspirational Professor Emma Jane Cuntslicker, the delightfully chavvy anal fuckslut Riley Throstlethwaite, the evil and sadistic Dr Hildegard Fotzenficker - and of course Alison & Rob and their family.

As it centres on the early life of Professor Cuntslicker, this ambiquel will be entitled Young Cunts - and Act One of it is in the queue as we speak. If it gets past the powers that be (never to be taken for granted), please have a shufti!

More later...

xx Grusha

If you recognise the title of this post - which probably means you are British (or at least a Two Ronnies fan) - you may appreciate this little pair of micros I've just posted here on Lush:

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/microfiction/four-candles

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/microfiction/four-candles-two-back-door

They're quite niche - but there's nothing quite like a nice wet niche is there...? 😉

Grusha

This is research for a story - honest!
I am curious to know, from any ladies who have them, what difference having breast implants has made to them sexually. How has it affected your physical sensitivity? How do you like the feel of them? The look of them?
Also - how has your partner (of either gender) enjoyed feeling/kissing/licking/sucking/fucking them (delete as applicable)? What has changed?
As a male, I adore tits. But, whilst "fake" tits make for great porn (well, I like them anyway), I have never (and probably will never) experience them "hands on". And I adore the soft, flexible, flowing nature of big natural tits - which is what my partner has. So really, I am wanting some handle on (pun intended) what it feels like to feel, kiss, suck, even fuck surgically-enhanced breasts, and how that is different from doing the same to natural breasts.
All for a story featuring a lesbian relationship between two young women with very different - though equally fulsome - tits.
Can anyone help me? Perhaps drop me a PM? Thanks!
Grusha

The results of the Clitorides Awards 2022 have just been announced, and two Lushies (at least) have made it to one of the many podiums, in this case for "Flash Erotic Story of the Year 2022":

DeviantSusie won first prize for Best Friends Forever

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/cheating/best-friends-forever-3

and I won second prize for Widadari Ophelia

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/voyeur/widadari-ophelia

Susie's story is brilliant, mine's not too bad either, and both are short - so have a read!

It has, of course, been an absolute pleasure rubbing clits with Susie: I highly recommend it... 

xx

Quote by KimmiBeGood
Just a note

Thank you, Kimmi, for this. Your post is nuanced, sincere, intelligently argued, carefully worded, non-polemical, and buttressed by well-chosen examples. Therefore, it genuinely generates more light than heat. OK, I don't agree with everything you say (see my previous post above), but - more like this, please!

Quote by sprite

so, authors... think about ALL the stories you've ever read. Hemingway? Patterson? King? Tollkien? The Bible? how many of them had dialogue that looked like this:

"MAKE ME CUM!" she shouted.

the answer? none of them. there's no real good reason to capitalize every letter when writing a story. just the little descriptor - she shouted - should give readers the idea. just because you've seen it on other porn stories, doesn't mean it's the way to do it. also, adding letters - i'm going to cuuuuuummmmm! - is just as bad. stop it. please.

I like all caps, and repeated letters. Sometimes they are the perfect way to express anything loud or out-of-control - e.g. anger, orgasm etc. J.K. Rowling uses all caps, as does Terry Pratchett, and George Orwell. Jaymal, CarltonStJames, VioletVixen, and doubtless many others use them, along with repeated letters. DeviantSusie makes a positive art-form out of repeated letters, and she does it so well: have a look through her stories, and you'll see what I mean.

Why not just use descriptors? Well, you can - and sometimes this works very well. But I like, when possible, to show rather than tell. Expressing the "music" of a character's speech, i.e. its rhythm, its resonance, its weight, its pacing, through unconventional orthographies, can save unwieldy descriptive vocabulary, especially at a moment of high drama in a story, or a sexual climax. It conveys the subtleties of how that character is feeling, without too much narrative intrusion. "I'm c-c-cccoming" is completely different from "I'm cominnnnnng..." from "'M COMIIIIING!!!" Read them out loud, and they make you feel different - in a way that narrative description can struggle to achieve.

Yes, it's pornographic. But we are writing porn, aren't we? Porn is "the depiction of erotic behavior (as in pictures or writing) intended to cause sexual excitement". Whether we describe our stories as porn, or erotica, or smut, and whatever our personal stylistic preferences, it's all about fucking. There are different literary styles available to us pornographers, some more appropriate to certain contexts than others. But these different styles lie on the same spectrum. They can work in partnership, rather than opposition.

Quote by VioletVixen
But do I go no bars held full-filth or literary filth?

Surely they are not mutually exclusive?

Quote by IMPURETHOUGHTS
w/ me, it's thrice recommended, now.

Why thank you, Natalya!

As we reel from the news of the passing of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II, British and Commonwealth readers may be interested to read my affectionate hommage to our Queen, and to the sceptred isle for which she has stood, in this story:

Snow White and the Seven Dildos

The Queen is known for her wicked sense of humour, and her ability as a mimic. She was also, in her youth, one of the finest young princesses ever. I hope my genuine respect and affection for her comes across in this story - despite its apparent irreverence...

Well, quite to my surprise, another RR has appeared on my story The Cursed Cunt! (Good things come to those who... wait.) In case you are hesitating, it's psycho-horror-meets-crime-procedural-meets-the-apocalypse. Oh, and it's very rude. And very good. And it's full of cunt. Here's what others have said about it:

"a mindfucking meld of the ecclesiastical and the erotic... this is next-level... hot (and disturbing) as fuck." (Jaymal)

"This is your best story! I loved everything from the title to finish! ... This is brilliant!!" (vanessa26)

"This contains everything I love about your stories - raw sex, filthy language, three-dimensional characters, plot twists - and then ramps it up" (naughtyannie)

"Excellently done. Engrossing. Intriguing." (CumGirl)

"This creeped me out to high heaven... I'm frightened, aroused and intrigued. Your writing is fucking fantastic" (CarltonStJames)

Give it a go! here (I hope) is a link:

https://www.lushstories.com/stories/horror/the-cursed-cunt-chapter-one

Quote by VioletVixen
myjewishlearning.com

Thanks to everyone who has offered their help on this, both here and privately. In the end, I found the challenge of finding out exactly what Jewish customs were current in different time periods a bit too much for my meagre scholarship. But I hope I made an acceptable compromise. Here's the story:

Akedah!

If you are well-versed in Jewish midrash, that title is your clickbait; but you will be surprised at where it in fact takes you...

Well, the story is up, "rentst" and all! Thanks for all your advice, and here is the finished product:

Akedah!

Moving back and forth between King James English and good ol' porno fuck-talk is a challenge - so if you like that kind of thing, please have a shufti!

I recently experimented writing a whole scene in the past perfect (pluperfect) tense. It is a lengthy flashback embedded and intercut into a futanari time-travel story: the story was written in the past tense; hence the flashback ended up pluperfect. And time travel adds another layer of complication to tense use! I am quite proud of how it turned out - but I sometimes wonder whether it might confuse some readers. Have other writers here struggled with the pluperfect? The story in question is Metamorphoses chapter 4: Slow Curtain. Below, a brief excerpt, in case it tempts any of you to have a closer look:

Daphne slouched back into her seat, but did not waste much time sulking, as her mind was too full of her unexpected encounter with Dr Gaia the previous weekend: "No," Daphne had insisted, "I am not leaving Lucy here to come back with you to the future! You sent me back here, and it was Lucy's foresight that allowed that to happen. We will not be parted!"

Al telaio tesserà lino e duolo pel lenzuolo che la coprirà... -- "To shroud herself shall she weave woe and linen at the loom," sang the chorus of gold miners on stage -- dressed, of course, in Ku Klux Klan outfits which they kept tripping over, much to Henke's annoyance.

"What we didn't realise, Daphne," Gaia had replied, "is that sending you back changed the course of the sexual history of mankind. It's one thing for women to want cocks. But now they're demanding multiple tits, or retractable dicks like the Vrdmlians. And men are wanting two or three cocks -- or both cocks and cunts, or expanded arseholes, so as to take all these huge ten-inch dicks we keep providing their wives with. And because Lucy has now learnt about this technology from you, and can research it at her Institute, all this demand has developed two hundred years earlier than we expected it to!"

Il mio cane dopo tanto mi ravviserà? -- "Will my dog recognise me after so long?" sang the chorus of miners, whilst bending over and miming buggering each other doggy-style through their KKK costumes. Henke smiled contentedly -- though Daphne could not tell whether this was mere directorly satisfaction, or because the mediocre but buxom mezzo-soprano, Bambi by name, whom he had cast as the squaw Wowkle, was now crouched at his feet, headdress feathers waving just above the level of his table as she slid her fulsome spit-lubricated tits up and down around his rather small penis. Daphne scoffed, but returned to brooding over the conversation with Dr Gaia.

"Oh, for goodness' sake, Doctor!" Daphne had responded. "This is ridiculous! You can't expect me to abandon my wife now, and let you take me away just because of your bullshit story about a 'crisis of demography'! You're a doctor, for Christ's sake, and you claim to have all this amazing sexual technology! So use it! Sort the problem! Yourselves!!"

etc.

Thank you, all, for your advice. The story resulting from these inquiries is up now:

It is entitled Akedah - and is my Biblical take on rope bondage...

Here is a link, in case you have a minute:

www.lushstories.com/stories/hardcore/akedah

Warning: it is very rude.

Grusha

Do any of you remember my story And There Came Two Angels to Sodom, based on the story of Lot's wife and daughters, which got thirty "5"s in the "Myths and Legends" competition but then sank without a trace?

Well, undeterred, I have re-cast that story as the first in a series entitled Scarlet Scripture. And the second episode is up now, entitled Akedah! Those of you versed in Hebrew midrash will think from the title that you know what it is about - but you would, of course, be wrong! Please do have a read, for my highly individual take on rope bondage in the Old Testament. Here is a link:

www.lushstories.com/stories/hardcore/akedah

Warning: it is very rude.

But very good.

Interesting: this has become a thread about two competitions instead of one.

1. re: flash comp: Never mind the competition, I have written a deeply personal story for this. Deeply. Like, cunt-deeply.

Here it is:

Widadari Ophelia

2. re: noir comp: Not sure I have any noir ideas left, I think I used them all up here:

The Cursed Cunt

Ah well...