As told to her husband Eric and me by Tori

“Looks like you worked out extra hard today,” observes the woman who always seems to be at the gym at the same time as Tori. She's standing a few feet down the row of lockers, getting dressed after showering.

“Uhh ... yeah, I’m working through some things,” stammers Tori, still half-absorbed in the thoughts occupying her.

“Kinda looked like it,” says the other woman as she picks up her bag and closes the locker, looking open to discussion - but not pryingly so.

Tori did, in fact, work out extra hard today. Angrily, even. But ... “Sorry, I’m kind of preoccupied. I don’t really want to talk about it right now.”

“No problem. Have a nice day,” smiles the woman as she leaves the locker room.

Well, that was rude of me, Tori realizes. And maybe a stranger would be the best person to talk to about this, since my husband knows all of my friends. She sure can't talk to anyone in her circle about sleeping with that Darrell guy last night. Yeccch. What a mistake he was.

Also, even if it's by a woman, it is nice to be noticed. Tori's been feeling pretty fucking invisible lately.

The next day is a chilly November one, and Tori heads to the gym for a short workout followed by a long session in the sauna. When she hits the hot, darkened, cedar-infused room, Watching Woman is already there.

“I guess I should introduce myself,” says Tori, much more amiably than last time, “since we keep running into each other. I’m Tori.”

“Jackie," responds the other woman broadly, extending her hand. "Pleased to meet you.”

“I’m really sorry about brushing you off yesterday.”

“Oh please. I should have guessed you were dealing with stuff and left you alone.”

“I realized afterward I shouldn't be so quick to avoid talking about what’s on my mind.”

“I don’t remember asking you to.”

“You’re right. You didn’t. I just assumed you were trying to start a conversation."

“You never know when one might erupt," chuckles Jackie.

Tori is charmed so far. "Actually, if you're willing to listen, it might be good for me to talk about this with a stranger."

"Sure. But I’ll warn you that if you do, I won't be a stranger anymore. Now, is it work, family or relationship trouble?”

“Relationship. When you saw me yesterday, I had just slept with someone I shouldn’t, and I was trying to cleanse both my body and my mind.”

“Ah, well, I hope you're not beating yourself up for that. Other than on the elliptical. We've all been there." She leans in, whispering, "Was it at least any good?”

“No, it was terrible! Charming enough at first, and hot too, but in the end, there was very little thought given to my pleasure.”

“One of the Beautiful Ones, huh? So pretty they don’t have to work at it? What led you to go to bed with them?”

Tori notices the use of a neuter pronoun and realizes Jackie might not be into men herself, so she clarifies the gender of the dickhead. “I’m kind of embarrassed to admit it, but I slept with him for revenge. That’s what I feel most guilty about.”

“Revenge?” asks Jackie quizzically. “Sooo … let me see if I understand this. You were so angry with this guy that you thought you could get even with him by ... " A smirk crosses her face as she concludes her facetious inquiry, "... having lousy sex with him?”

“Very funny!" utters Tori, laughing. "No, it’s my husband I’m angry with.”

“Oh, no,” deadpans Jackie. “Double-dick disappointment.”

“I don't know that I'd call Eric a dick. Most of the time, he's ... You know what? I take that back. What he did was really dickish. He fucking cheated on me!”

“Oh, I'm sorry, Tori." After a pause, she adds, "Uhh, sorry again ... I didn't mean to make light of this by rhyming your name. Especially when I was already trying to apologize for making light of what happened to you."

"Oh, you're fine, Jackie," Tori lightly assures her. "No offense taken. It's not like I haven't heard 'Sorry, Tori' a bazillion times."

"So what were the circumstances?”

“Well, we had been discussing the possibility of opening our marriage. But only when we were in bed and worked up.”

“Not exactly a binding agreement. Even a man should know that.”

“Exactly! But I was out of town for one night last weekend, and he took home some floozy from a bar … and fucked her right in our bed! I didn’t think people even did that anymore.”

“Oh, believe me, they still do. You and I have just aged out of it. Mostly.”

“Thing is, had we actually agreed to open up, I would have found it hot as hell. He’s maybe an average-looking guy, but I still find him really sexy, and I always get turned on when I know another woman is attracted to him. Like any guy, he sometimes looks at other women, and when they look back, it drives me wild." Tori admits to herself that she's getting a little hot thinking about it right now, even as angry as she is with Eric. Maybe the feeling is also a little bit due to the attention from Jackie.

"Sure, makes you feel like you made a good choice when the hotties are checking out your partner, right?"

"Yeah, you get it! So I was kind of excited about playing with that. But instead, he violated my trust and blew everything up. I’m so fucking angry with him!”

“Ignoring what he just did, do you love him?”

After a moment, Tori mutters, “Well, yes. I probably still do.”

“Do you think that if he’s really sorry, and enough time goes by, the two of you can eventually move past this?”

“Oh, I know he’s really sorry. And my head says yes, we can. But my heart isn’t ready to say yes right now. I guess, like you said, maybe some time has to go by.”

“Understandable. Maybe you need him to feel some accountability before you take him back?"

"Yes, that’s right! Wow, Jackie, thanks for listening. I feel a lot better just airing that out."

"Oh, it's nothing. Listen, I need to go meet a friend, but it was nice talking to you, Tori."

"You too, Jackie! I can't really talk to anyone else about it, so I really appreciate it."

"Well, if you need to again, you know where to find me," concludes Jackie as she exits the sauna.

Tori ponders this interaction while she's showering and driving home. From Jackie's matter-of-fact mannerisms, practical, undyed brown hair and choice of workout clothing, Tori realizes there is a good chance she might be a lesbian. You know what? Tori muses. “Maybe Jackie's onto something. Because right now, the solution to Tori's problems with men does not seem to be a man. And the emotional attention from Jackie has reminded her how much she could use some physical attention right now.

Tori's glad that nothing happened with Jackie in the sauna - what a cliché that would be! - but that evening, while she's pleasuring herself, she allows her mind to drift to thoughts of a woman’s sensitive touch rather than a man’s dick pounding her senseless. She's not precisely sure what being with a woman would be like, nor is she sure that Jackie is even interested in a straight woman, let alone her specifically. But the mere thought of not being entirely dependent on undependable men for pleasure is incredibly freeing. And while the sauna room was pretty dark, she got enough of a view of Jackie's full, sweaty silhouette to fire her imagination. It adds up to a spectacular, long-lasting orgasm for Tori, her best solo effort in a while.

+ + + + + + +

A week later, on the way to her workout, Tori bumps into Jackie in a coffee shop near the gym. Jackie looks like she just finished.

"Hey, Jackie, fancy running into you here!"

"Nice to see you ... Tori, right? I was about to do some laptop work before the gym, but I'd always rather talk to someone. Join me?"

"Absolutely!"

After they get their coffees and sit, Jackie asks, "So, how are things with your husband?"

"Ugh, I hear he's slept with more women. Like I said before, he's not classically good-looking, but there seems to be this niche of women who seem to find him hot. Me included, for better or worse."

"And how do you feel about what he's been up to?"

"Like he doesn't seem that sorry. Like he's using this as an excuse to spread his sperm around. Sorry, I should realize you might not appreciate me being so graphic."

"It's quite all right.” Leaning in, Jackie whispers, “But I appreciate your sensitivity to my perspective on sperm."

Tori's synapses fire at the closeness of Jackie's face and the confirmation of her sexuality, but she stays on topic. "I'm still really torn. I love him so much, but I am just not ready to get back together with him. Does that make any sense?"

"It makes all the sense in the world, Tori! You need time to recover and heal. And since he seems to be using this break to see other people, you might be better off emotionally if you do the same. Watching his escapades from the sidelines, alone, isn't going to be healthy for you."

“I guess you're right. That other guy I slept with was a reminder of what a gem Eric is, most of the time, and how many shitty men are out there if I did try to find another one."

“I won't argue the ‘shitty men’ part of that,” jokes Jackie.

The women have finished their coffees and get up to leave, Tori longing to take the next step with Jackie. "You're right that I probably should find other people to be with for now," she ventures, now giggling, "I might need some help getting around this ... shitty-men problem."

"Might you be looking for another option?" offers Jackie, eyeing Tori sidelong as she holds open the door for her.

"Seems it would be foolish of me not to explore all my options," Tori flirts.

"Have dinner with me tomorrow, and we can talk about that."

"I'd love that. I promise to listen and get to know you a little better, not talking only about my problems with men," says Tori as they stop next to Jackie's SUV. "But I do thank you for listening tonight."

"Sounds like a good time. I'll see you tomorrow."

They hug, then Tori tips her head back, and they kiss briefly on the lips.

Tori's lips are on fire as she drives home. So are other body parts. Did she just set a date with a woman? Yes! Jackie was right that seeing other people will be good. Especially if one of those other people is her.

+ + + + + + +

They meet at a semi-fancy Italian restaurant, sitting in a booth for privacy.

Tori learns more about Jackie and her background, her family, the challenges she's faced working in a male-dominated IT career.

As dessert arrives, Jackie changes the subject. "So, the other night," she inquires, leaning in and dropping her voice to a murmur, "was that the first time you've ever kissed a girl?"

"No. I did a couple of times in high school."

"Oooh, tell me more," enthuses Jackie, leaning back again. "I love first-time stories!"

"Well, my friend Julie and I kissed a few times, just to practice for boys."

"Was that her idea, or yours?"

"Hers. I think. I found it really nice though, enough that I wasn't sure we were really practicing for boys anymore ... but we never progressed beyond that. Sometimes, thinking back, I wish we had. Sorry, if you're looking for first-time stories of anything other than kissing, I don't have any."

"Well, it's never too late to try new things, is it?" ventures Jackie. "Then you can have more stories to tell."

"I like that idea," says Tori, placing a hand on Jackie's. "So tell me about your first time."

"I was a bit of a later bloomer, but I did the same with my friend Allison, and for exactly the same reason as you. Or so I thought. The instant our tongues touched, I knew I wasn't practicing for boys."

"Is that when you really knew you were ...?"

"Gay? I pretty much knew already, but that was the moment that really confirmed it. Unfortunately for me, Allison was only practicing for boys, and it took her about thirty seconds to figure out that I wasn't. Our friendship didn't survive that, sadly."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't be. I'm forever grateful to Allison for showing me that my destiny is not to please men."

"So is it ... to please women?"

"Well, it certainly seems to be something that I enjoy doing."

"I would love a demonstration sometime," flirts Tori, a finger tracing partway up Jackie's forearm.

"I'll be happy to," replies Jackie alluringly.

"Are you sure? You know I might go back to Eric."

"Are you kidding? I know you will go back to him. But if I'm lucky," she continues, raising her eyebrows, "not for a little while." She withdraws her hand, looking more serious. "To be clear about where I'm coming from, I just got out of a serious relationship. I'm not looking for another serious relationship, but I asked you out because I am hoping for more than a onetime 'demonstration' with you."

"I think I can be up for that," replies Tori huskily. "I don't know why I never thought about dating a woman before."

"Sometimes things happen when they're supposed to."

That thought lingers as they pay and head back to Tori’s.

As they walk in, Tori asks, “So, if I promise I'm in for more than the demonstration, would you give me one tonight?"

"I thought you'd never ask. And it's important that you do. I'm very much into consent."

"Well, I fucking consent."

"Very good," whispers Jackie into Tori's ear. "Now, what is it ... that you're consenting to? Do you consent to me kissing you?"

"Yes!" breathes Tori as Jackie nibbles on her ear. But does not yet kiss her on the lips.

"What will you consent to after that, Tori? Do you consent to me kissing your breasts?" Jackie lightly brushes her hand across Tori's chest, not yet kissing her there either.

“Oh my God, yes.”

"And do you consent to me pleasuring your womanhood?" Jackie wraps her hand around Tori's ass, then hips, then gently presses against her mound through her dress, somehow knowing exactly where to graze her clitoris.

"Yes,” moans Tori.

Hand in hand, they walk to the bedroom. Inside the door, Jackie raises her arm, spinning Tori around as in a dance move, so that Tori's back is to Jackie's chest. Jackie runs her tongue along Tori's neckline, then spins her back around to face her. Jackie and Tori stare at each other for a long time before bringing their faces together in a proper kiss.

"God, yes, Jackie. I am ready to love a woman."

They continue the kiss in the bedroom, Jackie kissing Tori's ear, then her neck, then her clavicle. Nibbling on her ear again, she touches Tori, delicately, on the shoulder, provoking a shiver, as she runs her finger down the neckline of Tori's little black dress, dipping into her cleavage before climbing out the other side. The finger continues over the shoulder and around the back, meeting her other hand to slowly unzip, letting the dress fall to the floor. A braless outfit, this leaves her breasts fully exposed. Jackie pointedly ignores Tori's points at first, running her hands down Tori's back and over her buttocks, pulling her closer in until her breasts are squeezed against Jackie.

Whispering "my turn" into Jackie's ear, Tori returns the favor, removing Jackie's dress, kissing and suckling down from her shoulders. She looks up to Jackie for acknowledgement, which Jackie returns in a nod.

Tori takes her first true taste of feminine flesh, suckling on Jackie's soft breasts, cupping them in her hands, squeezing them, experiencing them. Although she's never done more than kiss a woman, breasts have always fascinated her, and she's always played with her own a lot while masturbating. She's beside herself with enjoyment. Also beside Jackie, as the two of them move to the bed, spending minutes on end feeling and tasting each other's tits.

Finally, Tori's hands find themselves more on Jackie's hips and thighs, starting to pick at the topline of her underwear, then slipping underneath. Jackie shifts her weight so that Tori can pull the panties off, then lies back. Between her legs, Tori uses her hand to explore Jackie's outer parts first: the convolutions of her labia, the nub above, and the trimmed forest of surrounding hairs. She inhales deeply, taking in and approving of Jackie's intoxicating scent, before taking a tentative lick across the outer labia, just touching the clitoris.

Jackie returns a light moan of approval. Emboldened, Tori withdraws her mouth and explores deeper, a finger finding its way through the folds to Jackie's wettest spot, then tentatively exploring the well beneath. Tori might not be an expert at this, but it seems pleasurable enough for Jackie, who moans deeper. Now Tori slowly plunges deeper, also wrapping her lips around Jackie's labia and exploring their complex shape and taste.

She withdraws again, not wanting to take this further without knowing how it feels for a real woman - someone who knows what she's doing - to do the same to her. Jackie is happy to oblige, first kissing Tori and giggling, "Mmm, I taste so good!"

"Yes, you do. I didn't realize how much I'd like it."

"We'll get to seeing how you taste. In time." Jackie suckles Tori's breasts again, moving her hand between Tori's legs, which she opened in preparation. Jackie touches her lightly on the labia, so lightly that she shivers and shudders, grinding herself against the hand in response. Jackie rubs her hand on the outside of Tori's pudenda, indirectly massaging her pussy.

During this time, Jackie is alternately making out with Tori, and then kissing and sucking her boobs, occasionally putting her mouth on her ears, neck and clavicle.

Jackie has been gliding a finger back and forth across Tori’s opening, enough to wet it without entering. Suddenly and without warning, Jackie slips the finger in, abruptly, deeply. She's pushed it in at the perfect angle to produce no discomfort, only indescribable pleasure. "Ohhh," moans Tori. "That feels so fucking good."

"Then prepare for some good fucking."

Jackie curls her finger as she works it in and out of Tori's womanhood, ever so slowly at first, her fingertip milking out squeals of pleasure with each outward stroke. After some time, another finger, and then a third, joins it, filling her as completely as a penis, but doing things inside her that a penis never could do. And not being attached to a beefy man's pelvis, they can move far more quickly - and delicately. This also goes on for a lot longer than the eight minutes that the average penis can sustain.

Eventually, Tori reaches a broad plateau, trembling with pleasure at what Jackie is doing to her. She tenses up, breaking out in a cold sweat as she reaches an orgasm that lasts a full minute.

But to continue the landscape metaphor, it's a false summit. Tori is right back up there again, trembling.

"Beg for it," demands Jackie, knowing what Tori needs next.

"Oh please, Jackie! Go down on me now! I've never wanted anything more!"

Satisfied with the response she has been producing in Tori, Jackie shifts downward, drawing a long line with her tongue across Tori's abdomen, swirling it around inside her navel, and continuing further - all with a couple of fingers still working her insides. Her mouth finally finishes its journey at Tori's pussy, clamping around her clitoris and upper labia, her tongue then working on those parts in tandem with - and in rhythm with - her internal work.

Tori is practically screaming with pleasure, squealing out "Oh My God!" and much more sacrilegious oaths as she reaches her real orgasm, this one lasting even longer than the first. Jackie takes Tori in her arms and gently touches her all over as she comes down from the mountain, panting like an animal.

That, however, is just the beginning. Tori is anxious to return the favor, and she does. Right away, and having just had her amazing "demonstration," she knows enough to pleasure Jackie more than sufficiently. The two women spend hours exploring each other's soft, rounded bodies, alternately giving physical pleasure and learning more about each other.

And that is just their first night together.

Two months later, Tori has gotten very good at sex with a woman, bringing Jackie equally intense, long-lasting pleasure. But Jackie senses that Tori's anger and hurt feelings towards Eric have faded. Not that Tori's resentments have been the basis for this relationship, but they were the magnetic force repelling Tori from Eric and attracting her to Jackie, who decides to end things before these weakening forces reverse polarity, as they inevitably will.

"Wait, you're breaking up with me?

"I think you might be ready to go back to Eric soon. It's time to set you free."

"What makes you think I'm going to?"

"Come on, Tori, I've gotten to know you pretty well. Any longer and it might become too well."

"There's such a thing as too well?"

"Yes, for me there is. I fell for a straight woman once before. I will not let it happen again. It's time."

Tori spends a couple of weeks alone, pondering her delightful time with Jackie, but soon enough, Eric comes around and begs for her back. After a few more weeks, they agree that the break was good, but that they belong with each other - and that it is time to finally open their marriage. It doesn't amount to more than a few encounters a year for each of them, at least until years later when Joe Barnes enters the picture - but they do become closer as a result of the change. As part of the deal, they agree to tell each other about each person they sleep with. And not to tell each other about who they dated and slept with while they were separated.

The latter promise is one they've kept until now, with Tori finally sharing her Jackie experience.